Therapy

Sitting on the floor of Erin’s lounge, Brian chuckled as the small ball of black fur that apparently went by the name of Manson attempted to climb up his legs onto his chest, before falling back on the floor. Picking him up, Brian held him close to his chest, stroking the kitten who looked up at him, purring with contentment.

“I bet everyone think’s you’re named after Marilyn, but I’d lay down my last dime that someone named you after Charles,” he murmured. “Your momma’s a sick woman, just one of the many reasons why I love her,” he added, grinning as Manson began to fall asleep in his arms.

Looking around the room at the framed posters that graced the walls and books that some would find disturbing that lined the shelves of two bookcases, Brian wondered just what Erin’s clients would make of the woman away from the office. The side they saw was by no means a façade. She was everything they saw. Kind, thoughtful, someone who was always ready to listen and help them as much as she possibly could. Yet there was the other side, the one that those close to her knew. The heavy metal, horror novel and movie loving girl, who had a weird fixation with trying to delve into the psyche of serial killers and murderers and discovering just what made them tick. It was a bizarre mix, and yet it had all blended together and made her the girl Brian had fallen for.

Everything about the room in which he sat screamed Erin, and Brian loved it. He was glad they had decided to come back here after she had found him in Johnny’s Bar. They needed to talk, to try and figure out just where this mutual confirmation of feelings was going to lead them. Brian knew that if he had suggested his, Erin would have refused. It was the home he had shared with Michelle, Erin would have felt uncomfortable, and that was the last thing he wanted.

Something caught his eye as he continued to survey his surroundings. Placing Manson carefully in the armchair so as not to wake him, Brian stood and walked over the to the unit that was home to some of Erin’s trinkets. He grinned when he saw the photograph of all of them together. It had been taken in the garage of the Sanders home, where they would practise like crazy each day. The guys were all sprawled on a beat up couch, Val in Matt’s lap, Erin curled up in Brian’s. Brian couldn’t even remember the photograph being taken, all he knew was that those days were some of the ones he treasured the most. The days when everything had seemed so simple.

It was the one next to it though that really got Brian’s attention. Erin and Jimmy. Judging by Jimmy’s appearance it had to be one of the last ones ever taken of him. Brian knew the rest of the guys had all stayed in touch with Erin, that they saw her on a regular basis, especially Jimmy and Zacky. He also knew that they would fill her in on everything that was going on with him, whilst he got an update on her once in a blue moon.

“That was taken two days before you all fly out to Vegas for Matt’s bachelor weekend,” Erin stated, walking into the room with a couple of beers.

She had changed out of the dress she had worn for work that day into some jeans and an aging Pantera shirt.

“They had tried to convince me to go with you all,” she added, handing Brian a beer.

“Sounds about right,” Brian laughed.

“Yeah, they also wanted me to go to yours.”

Brian coughed as he almost choked on the mouthful of beer he had just taken.

“They what?”

Erin smiled widely.

“Mmhmm, Matt was even on the verge of just getting me a ticket, but as it would happen I was out of town that weekend visiting mom anyway.”

“Maybe you should have come, might have prevented the last year being a complete waste of fucking time,” Brian told her with a wink.

Not giving him an answer, Erin moved over to the couch.

“There are still days when the phone will ring and I expect it to be him, or something will happen and the first person I want to tell is Jimmy,” she admitted quietly. “I can’t even begin to imagine what it’s like for you.”

Joining her, Brian let out a deep breath, resting a hand on her thigh.

“Pretty much the same, but it’s gotten better,” he assured her.

Brian gazed at her for a minute, not sure if what he was going to say was going to sound a little crazy, but knowing that he had to get it out in the open.

“The day of his funeral, I actually thought for one brief insane moment that I saw you there, but I had to be wrong.”

Reaching out, Erin took Brian’s hand in hers.

“You weren’t wrong. I couldn’t not be there,” she confessed. “I wanted to talk to you, but it just wasn’t the day for intruding. So, I stayed for the service and just slipped away afterwards.”

Brian just nodded, attempting to show that he understood. Even though if there had been any time over the last ten years that he had needed Erin, it was then. However, he knew that was maybe a conversation for another day. Tonight was about their future, not for dwelling on the past. Brian noticed the way Erin appeared to be a little lost in her thoughts.

“Rin, are you really sure this is what you want?”

Looking over at him, Erin smiled warmly.

“Of course, I wouldn’t have hunted you down otherwise. It’s just…”

Erin paused, trying to find the right words.

“I know I said about us taking it slow and steady, because that’s the right thing to do. Yet all I keep thinking about is that you’re leaving for tour in a week, and whilst that’s possibly a good thing, because it will give us both time to deal with how we’re feeling and maybe prove that we can just kinda pick up where we left off, I can’t help but think that maybe…”

For the second time that evening, Brian cut her off with a kiss, his fingers stroking her cheek.

“You worry way too fucking much,” he murmured against her lips.

Taking her bottle and placing it on the table by the couch, Brian held both her hands..

“You’re right, me being on tour is a good thing, we’re not going to be in each other’s faces, it’s going to allow us to take our time. But that’s it. No if’s, buts or maybes, so any worries you have, you can forget them. This is us Rin, and yeah, ten years may have passed, but when I’m here, with you, it just feels right.”

“I’m hopeless. People pay me good money to sort out their relationship woes, and 99% I’m successful in that. Yet when it comes to me, I haven’t got a fucking clue half the damn time,” Erin sighed.

“Only 99%?” Brian questioned.

“You’d call you and Michelle a success story?” Erin questioned with a laugh.

“In some ways,” Brian smirked. “It brought us back together.”

“Dumbass,” Erin muttered, kissing him again.

Leaning forward, Brian eased Erin back onto the couch, her arms wrapping around his neck as his fingers toyed with her auburn hair. Easing her lips apart, Brian deepened the kiss, groaning as he felt Erin pull away a little before they got too carried away.

“Just one question,” Erin began, “Are you mentioning this to the guys just yet?”

“No, I figured we should leave it a while,” Brian answered.

“Good, because I’m having lunch with Zacky tomorrow and I just wanted to check we were on the same page.”

“Gotcha,” Brian murmured, his lips finding her neck, his hand travelling underneath the material of her shirt.

“Brian!” Erin warned. “Slow and steady,” she reminded him, unable to stop herself from smiling.

“I know, I know,” he sighed, looking and sounding like the Brian of ten years ago.

Erin ran her fingers through his hair.

“It’ll all be worth it, I promise,” she reassured him, not entirely convinced she’d be able to stick to the deal herself.