Mielisairas Rakkaus - a Crazy Dudesons Love Story

Nikki woke up very late the next day with Jetlag. The Dudesons were all awake, and still at the house, pulling pranks on each other. Or actually, HP, Jarno, and Jarppi pulling pranks against Jukka, as he was on the other team. She rubbed the sleep from her eyes and looked over to see Lynn was still asleep and laughed, she would be able to make the first move.

“I know what you’re thinking, so turn around.” Lynn said lazily from her place in bed before standing up and walking out of the room fully dressed, and smiling. Nikki behind her and let out the most fearful, ear-shattering, horror movie scream she had ever heard from her before. They’re crawling from her bed onto her leg, was Dave’s pet tarantula. She couldn’t push it off, because she was afraid to touch it, but in her thrashing it fell off and onto the floor. In one very agile movement she leaped from her bed, onto Lynn’s, and bounced to the door, running after her now laughing friend in a fury.

“LYNN YOU WHORING BITCH!” she screamed, and threw the nearest thing to her, which luckily happened to be Jarppi’s pillow, sending it bouncing off said whoring bitch’s head. “Who-what?” she laughed, trying to act innocent? Nikki was extremely upset with her for the prank; Lynn knew she was afraid of spiders. There were certain lines that shouldn’t be crossed, and forcing someone’s worst fear on them was one of them, along with messing with their hair, and completely ruining their car, or prized possessions. Instead of yelling at her more, she just left the house and went for a walk to cool off.

“Is she all right?” Jarno asked in concern once everyone’s ears quit ringing from her scream. “She will be. I don’t really know how your prank wars start, but this is kind of how it goes for us. Someone gets really pissed, someone gets hurt, that hurt someone gets revenge, and the battle begins. It always ends up being really fun in the end, and we all ends up laughing until someone cough, cough, Lynn, cries, and somehow form a truce and everything’s okay. She just needs to cool off, Nikki’ll be back soon enough.” Squint shrugged. “Fuck you.” Lynn laughed and walked into the kitchen to try to find something to eat. “And if she gets lost?” Jarppi questioned. “She never does. Then again, she’s never been pissed in Finland… Ehm, she’s on your team anyway.” He shrugged with a laugh, and chased after his friend.

Meanwhile Nikki was storming her way through the woods behind her brother’s house without a care as to where she was going. All she cared about was figuring out the perfect plan to get back at Lynn. She wasn’t afraid of spiders, snakes, bats, rats, or anything else that drove Nikki insane, she didn’t have a car to steal, they shared a bedroom… there really was a short supply of ammunition. Normally after a “joke” like that she would just go to her big brother and have him put his teammates in their place, but since he was at work she was on her own.

With an exasperated sigh she plopped down next to a tree and leaned against it, closing her eyes and taking in the sounds and smells around her. “Well Lynn is a bitch, she’s a big fat bitch, she’s the biggest bitch in the whole wide world.” She sang with a light chuckle, unaware someone was sneaking up to her, “She’s a stupid bitch, if there ever was a bitch, she’s a bitch to all the boys and girls.”

“Did you write that yourself?” Jarno asked, clearly trying not to laugh.

“Delete it.”

“Delete what?”

“The footage. I know you’re taping this, Jarno.” She laughed as she stood up and faced him. She didn’t expect HP to be standing right there only a few inches from her when she turned around though, jumped, and fell backwards. He laughed and helped her back to her feet. “He’s not going to delete this.” He chuckled. “I know, and if you weren’t on my team I’d hurt you… but I can’t because I kind of need you guys.” She sighed and leaned against the tree lazily.

“So what’re you guys doing out here anyway?” she yawned. “We came to make sure you didn’t get lost again.” Jarno grinned. “Hey, I may be useless in the city, but I never get lost in the woods.” She laughed. “Didn’t you live in a city though?” HP asked confusedly. “Yeah, but dad lived outside the city, in the woods. We used to go hiking and camping all the time. Well, I did. Dave kind of… he and dad really hate each other. Let’s leave it at that.” She sighed and randomly started walking.

“Are you coming back to the house?” Jarno called after her. “Uh, no? Why? There’s no food worth eating, Lynn’s a bitch, in case you couldn’t figure that out already, Squint’s plotting… there’s a freaking beast of a spider in my bed… I’m gonna find somewhere to crash.”

“Are you sleeping in a tree?”

“Nope. Because I can’t climb trees. Of all the things I learned to do, that’s not one of them.” And with that she took off running. They chased after her, both tripping over things she easily jumped over and dodged, and eventually lost her completely. They started running again when they heard her scream bloody murder, for the second time in an hour.

They finally found her on the ground crying harder than she was when they first met. “Nikki, what happened?” Jarno gasped, but she didn’t answer. HP knelt down beside her to try and see if she was hurt, while Jarno stood there and filmed the whole thing. “DON’T” she screamed tearfully when he almost touched her ankle. “I think it is broken,” he announced, “Jarno, do you have your phone?”

Jarno lowered the camera and checked his pockets before looking back to them with guilty eyes. “Nikki do you have yours?” he asked hopefully while Jarno refocused the camera. “No! Where’s yours?” she demanded. “Jukka stole it.” He sighed and started to pick her up.

“Wait, no. No, what are you doing?” she gasped as the intense pain from her ankle got worse as it moved. “We have no phones to call for help, how else are we supposed to get you back to the house?” he asked. “Please don’t though, it hurts!” she cried, struggling to keep from open sobbing. “Nikki, we don’t really have a choice. Even if we had our phones we would just be calling someone else to carry you.” Jarno pushed. “We know it hurts, Nikki. But if it makes you feel better you aren’t the first one we have carried like this.” HP smiled, trying to make light of the situation.

After about ten minutes of arguing and protesting, they finally convinced her to let HP carry her, but upon standing to walk home they realized they had no idea where they were, or how to get back. “East,” she announced as the two men stood still, trying to figure things out. “How do you know?” Jarno asked curiously. “That tree over there. I passed it before falling in the hole. I was running west, basically a straight line from Dave’s.” she answered, trying to disguise the winces of pain in her voice. HP just nodded and started walking, following her directions on how to get home.

“Where’s your team now!” Squint roared as he, Jukka, and Lynn chased Jarppi through the house with homemade semi-automatic rubber band guns. “Hell yeah! Who’s your daddy?” Lynn laughed, jumping onto the couch he dove behind, wearing her pink tux. “Not you.” He laughed and ran for the door. As soon as he opened it he stopped and stared at his three teammates as they slowly made their way to the house. Jukka went to tackle him but froze when he saw HP carrying Nikki and announced for a temporary truce before Lynn and Squint could finish what he started.

“What the hell happened?” Lynn yelled as they ran out to see if they could help. “I was running from HP and Jarno, and I fell in a hole.” Nikki answered matter-of-factly. “Is it broken?” Jukka asked seriously. “We don’t know.” Jarno answered as HP carried her into the house and put her down on the couch.

After the first aid had been done they found out that her ankle wasn’t broken after all, just badly twisted. The guys all went out to play some game after their to-be prank war had come to a truce over Nikki’s injury, and Lynn stayed behind to keep Nikki company as she iced her ankle.

“So, running from HP and Jarno?” she asked suggestively. “Shut up, you know it wasn’t like that.” Nikki laughed.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever you say. You gotta admit though, they’re cute.”

“And filming you right now.”

Lynn’s face turned a deep red as Jukka and Jarno started laughing behind her. “Yeah… keep laughing Jukka, I didn’t say you were attractive.” She shot before leaving for her room.

“How’s your ankle?” he asked while Jarno went to do something to the camera. “Peachy.” She muttered sarcastically, looking out the window where Squint was sitting at a picnic table with HP and Jarppi.

“Well that’s a good thing?”

“It feels a little better, so yeah.”

“Great! The guys want you two to come outside and play with us. We’re playing spoons, if we can find the cards and enough spoons.”

“I can’t get out there, because I can’t walk on my ankle Jukka.”

“I’ll help you.”

“You’re not carrying me like HP did. I trust you, but that was just scary; I kept thinking he was going to drop me.”

“Fine. I won’t carry you like HP did.” He smirked and left for a few minutes, returning with grinning Lynn, and Jarno. As if the “We’re up to something” grins weren’t enough to worry Nikki, Lynn had the camera. “All right, on three.” Jukka announced as he and Jarno grabbed opposite ends of the cough. “Oh guys…” she gasped as they picked up the couch and started carrying her to the door.

As soon as they got to the doorway everyone started to laugh uncontrollably, because the couch didn’t fit through the opening. “Fail!” Nikki breathed through her giggling. “We have to turn it,” Jarno announced. “Turn it how?” she demanded, suddenly are losing the humor of the situation. “Don’t worry, we won’t drop you; we just have to tip it a little.” Jukka answered.

“Really, I think I can hobble… maybe crawl? You don’t have to, oh Jesus!”

“Sorry Nikki!” both guys gasped as the couch hit the ground. “W-what happened?” Lynn asked, trying her hardest not to laugh. “Jukka lied, that’s what happened.” Nikki grunted as Squint and Jarppi came running over to see what happened.

“The couch is stuck in the doorway guys.” Squint announced. “Really?” Nikki asked, now it was her turn to laugh as the pain in her ankle subsided. “Yeah, it’s stuck good too. I guess we have to carry you after all.” Jukka grinned and picked her up from the couch. “I hate you.” She sighed as he handed her off to Jarppi. “But we love you.” Jarppi laughed as he carried her to the table to sit beside HP while he and Squint helped the others locate cards and spoons.

“Dave lives here alone, they won’t find enough spoons. We’ll probably be playing Spoons, Forks, Knives, and Anything Else we can find.” She announced with a humorous sigh. “Well that could be fun still.” He chuckled.

“I didn’t say it wouldn’t be. But someone is going to get stabbed in the hand if it happens that way.”

“Probably Jarppi, he’s the clumsy one.”

“I tripped and fell in a hole while trying to ditch you guys, got stuck in a suitcase, and crashed your car. He’s the clumsy one?”

“You need to stop being so caught up on those things. The suitcase doesn’t matter; it was our fault. And the car was… also our fault. We shouldn’t have made you drive. Nobody got hurt though, and that’s what matters now. As far as you falling into that hole and hurting the ankle… you should really be more careful while playing in the woods.”

She smirked and playfully punched him in the arm. “I am serious though, those little things shouldn’t be something to dwell on. Do you know how many cars we have crashed? We sometimes buy a car, just to crash it!” he smiled, raising his voice a little at the mention of buying a soon-to-be-junket, making her laugh with his enthusiasm.

“Nikki! Quit flirting with the Finnish boy! Finnish boy, quit undressing my friend with your eyes; it’s time to play FORKS!” Lynn shouted, jumping up and pushing herself between them. “Forks?” she questioned. “Yeah… we were aiming for spoons but your brother only owns like… two spoons. But he has elevendy-bazillion forks!” she answered like an excited child as Jarno shuffled the cards and Squint set out the forks. “Yes I found and brought out the first aid kit.” He answered before she could ask. “Well okay then.” She shrugged and waited for the game to begin.

Never before had Nikki seen a card game go on for so long. They had been playing for a total of three hours now, and were still going. So far Lynn had leapt across the table to wrestle a fork that she and Jukka had grabbed simultaneously out of his hands, Squint had somehow took an elbow to the face and was sure to have a black eye from it, and Jarppi accidentally kicked Nikki’s hurt ankle.

“FORKS!” Lynn gasped and snagged the first fork, starting the fight for forks as a chain reaction. Amongst the pounding of hands on the table Nikki’s squeal of pain sounded, followed by her own laughter. “We should have made a bet, HP! I got stabbed before Jarppi!” she shouted while he, laughing just as hard, went about the first aid since he was the closest to the kit.

“When Dave comes home, he’s gonna shit.” Squint chuckled. “Why?” Jarno and Jarppi asked together. “House is trashed, bathroom door is broken, his sister has a screwed up ankle from his two friends chasing her through the woods, and now she has been stabbed with a fork. He’ll never leave us unsupervised again.” He answered with a dramatic sigh. “Hey we’re all grown-ups, we can take care of ourselves.” Nikki laughed. “And each other, own, owe!” Lynn joked as HP finished up the bandaging.

“Was that a sex joke?” Squint asked blankly.

“Ehm, kind of.”

“It sucked.” Nikki laughed.

“You suck.”

“You suck harder.”

“And better.” She smirked triumphantly, “Oh look, Dave’s home!” she beamed, changing the subject quickly. “Hey Dave!” Nikki waved, not noticing the woman who was walking up beside him. “Hey Nikki… damn it guys I thought you were going to keep your dudesoning to a minimal until they got settled in?” he sighed after noticing the bandaged hand, ace-bandaged ankle, and Squint’s bruising eye. “They started it.” Jukka defended. “‘Tis true.” Lynn mused; leaning her head affectionately on Jarppi’s shoulder and earning a disapproving scoff from Dave’s friend. It was then Nikki noticed who it was. “Shit.” She muttered, making sure the Bitch didn’t hear her.

“Hey, I’m gonna go inside, it’s getting cold out here.” She lied and tried to limp to the house. She got part of the way there before she felt someone grab hold of her to steady her and take some weight off of her injured ankle. “Thanks guys.” She sighed as Squint took her other side to help Jarppi get her to the house.