Lips of an Angel

With a fierce force, Bam slammed the front door to his house, causing the windows to rattle in their frames. His eyes scanned the panoramic view before him, and the mess he saw churned his stomach. His house was never clean anymore, but he stepped over the clothes, the empty beer cans and bottles and moved further into the house to find what he was looking for. Tammy. Tammy was one of the women in Bam’s life and even though he wasn’t sure if he was in love with her, he kept her around to satisfy his manly needs. Tammy was a wild one, and he liked that.

‘’Tammy,’’ Bam yelled out in frustration and ran up the stairs to his room. Not surprisingly he found Tammy sprawled out on his bed, in nothing but a black pair of panties.

Bam smirked to himself. Perfect, he thought and jumped onto the bed, waking Tammy up. He knew she would never get mad at him and she would do anything for him because if she needed anything, Bam was the one that got it for her. Tammy lifted her head and blinked up at Bam, turning her body to expose her nakedness to him.

‘’Just what I wanted,’’ Bam sighed as he fell down next to her, drawing her into his arms. As he roughly started kissing her, he assured himself this was what he needed to get Michelle off his mind. Since leaving the bar and finding Michelle in her car, and walking away from her, he had a nagging voice in his head telling him that he should have gone to talk to Michelle and flashes of Michelle kept popping in his mind. Now though, he knew he would get her out of his mind and that voice would shut the hell up.

Michelle woke up with start, jumping out of bed. Her head swiveled to the left and right, but she couldn’t see what the noise was that had woken her up in that manner. Lifting a hand to her pounding head, she sighed as last nights events came rushing to her.

Grabbing some clothes, she sauntered to the bathroom to get ready for the day that lay ahead of her. Dropping her clothes onto the basin counter, she stared in the mirror that revealed her blood shot, swollen eyes. ‘’It doesn’t help crying all night – this is what you get out of it,’’ she mumbled to herself and stepped into the shower but fresh tears burned her eyes when she thought of Bam and what he had said to her. She had truly loved Bam, and a part of her still did but she knew she had to get him out of her head.

Feeling angry and resentful, she made way downstairs to look in the news paper for a job, because she knew Bam wouldn’t hire her. She didn’t know if she wanted to work for Bam either, anyway. Pulling her hair up into a messy pony, she spotted her mother and Andrea sitting at the kitchen counter drinking coffee and eating doughnuts. Before Michelle could escape, because she didn’t think she could face them, Andrea called out Michelle’s name.

‘’Did you have good night, honey?’’ Michelle’s mom asked and couldn’t help it, but she shot her mother a cold glance. It was after all her mother and father that made her get the abortion.

‘’Actually I didn’t,’’ Michelle answered coolly.

‘’Looks like you did,’’ Andrea responded, with sweet smile.

‘’Well I didn’t, Andrea,’’ Michelle shot at her and blew a piece of hair from her eyes. ‘’Why the hell didn’t you tell me Bam owned The Note?’’

Andrea’s eye’s widened at Michelle. Michelle was one of the meekest and sweetest people Andrea knew, and this a side no-one ever really saw, so Andrea knew something must have happened.

‘’I…I…’’ Andrea stammered and slipped off her chair, composing herself. ‘’I didn’t think to, I mean just because you and Bam broke up doesn’t mean that you can’t work there. You broke up ages ago!’’

Michelle took her eyes off Andrea and moved them to her mother. Her mothers eye’s were to the floor though as if she found something more interesting on the floor to look at, but her hunched shoulders told Michelle that she was feeling her pain, she just couldn’t look her in the eye.

‘’You’re right,’’ Michelle said to Andrea, and she gave her sister a weak smile. None of this was Andrea’s fault – she only thought that Michelle and Bam broke up a few years ago and by now they would have put it aside and got on. She was still so naïve and young when Michelle’s world crashed around her that Andrea didn’t understand. She still didn’t.

‘’Bam is a good boss, Michelle,’’ Andrea said with a smile again, knowing her sister already forgave her. ‘’He pays well, gives us free beer, and is generous when it comes to needing time off.’’

‘’Good,’’ Michelle said and touched her sisters arm lightly, reassuring her that she wasn’t still mad at her. ‘’I’m going for a walk though.’’

Michelle left before Andrea or mother could say another word to her. Walking under the hot sun, Michelle wished she grabbed a bottle of water before she left. The neighborhood was still beautiful and so green, it was nothing but lush. The problem was that she and they guys had been everywhere in the neighborhood and not one place was left where she didn’t think about the times she had with them…and Bam.

As Michelle came to a park, where kids were playing, skating and giggling as though life were a great big pleasure, Michelle sat down on the curb. She smiled at the kids, wondering how they were going to turn out. It was her, and her friends playing in that park once, thinking the same thing – that life was a pleasure. And it was, except for one big hole that came into her life and never left. She hoped that each and everyone of the kids there had a happy life from that day forward.

A car suddenly came to a screeching stop in front of Michelle, causing her heart to sink to her stomach and then jump out of her throat. Before her heart was back in place and she could think straight, Ryan jumped out of the car.

‘’Hey babe, I’ve been looking for you,’’ he said with a grin that warmed Michelle’s heart, even if he did come to a few inches of riding her over. ‘’Are still mad at me?’’

‘’For what? Last night or trying to ride me into the ground?’’ Michelle asked, with a cocked brow.

‘’Last night, because I would never ride you into the ground,’’ Ryan said and sat down next to Michelle, draping an arm around her shoulder.

‘’Naw, I’m not mad at you…anymore,’ Michelle said honestly and leaned against Ryan for support.

‘‘Raab, Dico and Rake wanted to come with to see you, but they thought you might be mad at them too,’’ Ryan said softly

‘’I’m not mad at them. They were Bam’s friends and I can understand why he didn’t want you all to hang out with me after, well, you know,’’ Michelle replied

‘’Good, then we’ll have a party sometime,’’ Ryan said and kissed Michelle’s temple.

‘’You know, I understand where Bam is coming from, but does he have to be so nasty to me?’’ Michelle asked, more to herself than Ryan.

‘’I know you both hurt,’’ Ryan said and then squeezed Michelle’s shoulder, ‘’but give him little time, he may come around.’’

‘’I doubt it. I’m also so sorry you were in the middle of it Ryan,’’ Michelle said and let her head fall into her hands. Would the stupid tears never end? She didn’t want to cry in front of anybody, but if she had to, she knew she could cry in front of Ryan.

‘’As long as you aren’t pissed at me, I don’t care,’’ he replied

‘’I’m not pissed at anyone. Though I wasn’t told by you, Ape or Andrea that it was Bam’s club, I’m not pissed, and I’m not even pissed at my mom – the person I’m pissed at is my dad. I know he would have convinced my mom that the abortion was the right thing to do, and he is a cheating husband and lying father,’’ Michelle said without even taking a breath.

‘’Your father was very controlling, Chelle,’’ he said with a nod and then out a laugh. ‘’Imagine if he saw that book that Bam wrote – the one with calendars and you name everywhere.’’

Michelle couldn’t help but giggle. He father would seethe knowing his daughters name was in a book, knowing exactly when she had lost her virginity and when she had had sex.

Michelle looked up at Ryan with a sudden puzzled look on her face. ‘’Why did Bam do that book? He hates me so much.’’

‘’How do you or I know how he really feels Michelle?’’ Ryan asked. ‘’Only Bam really knows how he feels and to be honest I think he is confused most of the time.’’

Michelle laughed and nodded. ‘’With so many knocks to his head who knows?’’ she said and thanked Ryan for making her laugh so much. And understanding her.

Bam woke up and adjusted his eyes to the clock next to the bed. It was past noon. He looked at Tammy laying next him, with all her tattoo’s and although it was appealing to him, he would have also like to have seen a piece of skin that was pure and clean. He sat up in bed and shook his head lightly, running a hand over his jaw. He hadn’t shaved in days and as he looked at Tammy again, he wanted it to be Michelle.

Letting out a groan, wishing that thought hadn’t come to him, he went to the bathroom. He wondered how someone who could hate someone so much as he did Michelle, could want to love her so much again. Without willing it, he would sometimes wish he could taste her again, to feel her hands run up his body and his fingers down her soft, silky skin. One thing he was sure of was that he wanted her to work for him – she was a hard worker, she was gorgeous and good with people, making her an asset to his business.

Yes, he decided, that he was going to have to talk to Michelle again, if only for his business.