Easy To Hate?
Pt. 4
"Kammy? Are you okay?" Mack asked, in response to my complete shock.
How selfish of me... Nick and Tyson and... Well, whoever else is in the band now... They weren't a full band when I was in the picture... But still... They had talent. And I was being selfish for wanting them to not make it. <p> I thought I had a good reason... But obviously not.
"I'm fine." I told Mack.
"Are you sure?" he asked.
"Look! If I say I'm fine, then I'm fine!" I snapped.
The look of hurt in Mack's eyes didn't phase me. It should've, but at the moment I felt like being a bitch. Sue me.
"Its obvious you're hurt," Mack said timidly.
"Hurt? You think I'm hurt? Please." I said nastily.
"Okay... You know what? I'm gonna let you have some alone time."
He got up and left without looking back.
After a moment or two of being alone, I felt awful.
The way I treated Mack was uncalled for.
I sat quietly on the bench while I slowly searched for Mack's number in my cell phone.
I had to apoligize.
It rang once... Twice... Three times... "Hello?" his kind voice answered.
"Mack? Uh... It's Kammy. I just wanted to apoligize. For the way I just acted." I said.
"It's fine. I'd be pretty pissed off too if my ex got famous." he laughed.
"Yeah... I hoped too much that they'd crash and burn - Not literally, but you know what I'm saying." I told him.
"Of course. But hey, I'm gonna let you go. 'Cause I seem to remember you telling me you had to study?" he questioned.
"Aw, man. You rememebered?" I said.
"Yes, now go to your dorm and study." he sounded like a parent. But it was cute the way he did it.
Oh my God... Was I falling for this guy?
After getting off the phone with Mack, going to my dorm, and studying for another hour, I went to bed.
Gracie didn't get in until midnight. Tsk-Tsk.
She woke me up, and oh man... I'm downright evil when I wake up.
"Damn you. Do you know what time it is?" I asked her groggily as I sat up and tried to see her.
"I'm sorry. Go back to sleep." she said in a soft whisper.
"Shame-shame girly! What were you and Cole doing this late?" I teased.
"Shut up and go to bed." she said, throwing her shoe at me.
"Ouch! Thats supposed to make me sleep?" I asked, tossing the shoe on the floor.
"Why not? Now go to bed." she said... Sounding pissed might I add.
"What happened?" I asked.
It was dark, but I could hear her beginning to cry.
"Gracie, what the hell happened?" I asked, turning on my bedside lamp.
Her mascara was running like you wouldn't believe. She'd been crying for a while.
"Go back to sleep. You have a test tomorrow." she said wiping her face.
"Screw the test, what happened?" I walked over to Gracie and gave her a hug.
Once I did that, she latched on to me and wouldn't let go. I sat her down on her bed and grabbed a box of tissues.
"Whats wrong?" I asked, once again.
"He said we - We weren't right for each other..." she said, sobbing in between words.
"Oh, Gracie... I'm so sorry..."
"The only reason dumped me is because I wouldn't sleep with him!" she grabbed a few tissues and blew her nose.
That, I didn't have an answer for... She'd been with Cole for a while... I assumed they already... Well then.
"Did you ever sleep with Nick?" she asked.
Damnit... I was afraid she'd ask that.
"Well... Yeah... But that was because I was ready. Sweetie, if you aren't ready you shouldn't do anything!" I told her.
"I know... But you and Nick broke up... Don't you feel bad about doing that?" she asked.
"No. Because we were really in love. If Cole doesn't want you to wait, then he doesn't love you."
"Nick didn't pressure you?"
"Nope. He respected me." I explained. Damnit!! I didn't want to talk about this because it made me miss Nick.
"Well... I love Cole..." she sighed.
"No! Hell no, you aren't going to have sex with him so he'll get back with you." I said quickly.
"I love him so much!" she cried.
"He doesn't care about your feelings though." I told her.
After an hour, I finally convinced Gracie that doing something she doesn't wanna do won't make anything better.
Both of us were very tired... So we went to bed.
I fell asleep thinking about Nick. Again.
It was a long time ago...
"Nick, you have to promise me something..."
Nick and I were sitting on his couch in his basement, hanging out with Tyson.
Tyson went to the bathroom, so I thought I'd ask Nick a serious question.
He looked at me, prepared to answer.
"We'll always love each other?" I asked.
At the time... Oh man... His simple "Yes," answer, made me feel complete...
I needed to feel safe. And with Nick, I did.
I kissed him, which led to us making out, which then led to Tyson coming back in the room and jumping on top of us to break us up.
Sounds like Tyson, doesn't it?
I woke up to my cell phone alarm the next morning.
I took a shower, and headed to class.
After the test (which, I think I aced, by the way) I turned my cell phone back on.
I had a text message from a number I didn't recognize.
"We need to talk"
That was what it read. I didn't reply to the message, instead, I called the number.
The person answered on the second ring.
"Kammy?"
My heart skipped a beat.
"Nick?"
How selfish of me... Nick and Tyson and... Well, whoever else is in the band now... They weren't a full band when I was in the picture... But still... They had talent. And I was being selfish for wanting them to not make it. <p> I thought I had a good reason... But obviously not.
"I'm fine." I told Mack.
"Are you sure?" he asked.
"Look! If I say I'm fine, then I'm fine!" I snapped.
The look of hurt in Mack's eyes didn't phase me. It should've, but at the moment I felt like being a bitch. Sue me.
"Its obvious you're hurt," Mack said timidly.
"Hurt? You think I'm hurt? Please." I said nastily.
"Okay... You know what? I'm gonna let you have some alone time."
He got up and left without looking back.
After a moment or two of being alone, I felt awful.
The way I treated Mack was uncalled for.
I sat quietly on the bench while I slowly searched for Mack's number in my cell phone.
I had to apoligize.
It rang once... Twice... Three times... "Hello?" his kind voice answered.
"Mack? Uh... It's Kammy. I just wanted to apoligize. For the way I just acted." I said.
"It's fine. I'd be pretty pissed off too if my ex got famous." he laughed.
"Yeah... I hoped too much that they'd crash and burn - Not literally, but you know what I'm saying." I told him.
"Of course. But hey, I'm gonna let you go. 'Cause I seem to remember you telling me you had to study?" he questioned.
"Aw, man. You rememebered?" I said.
"Yes, now go to your dorm and study." he sounded like a parent. But it was cute the way he did it.
Oh my God... Was I falling for this guy?
After getting off the phone with Mack, going to my dorm, and studying for another hour, I went to bed.
Gracie didn't get in until midnight. Tsk-Tsk.
She woke me up, and oh man... I'm downright evil when I wake up.
"Damn you. Do you know what time it is?" I asked her groggily as I sat up and tried to see her.
"I'm sorry. Go back to sleep." she said in a soft whisper.
"Shame-shame girly! What were you and Cole doing this late?" I teased.
"Shut up and go to bed." she said, throwing her shoe at me.
"Ouch! Thats supposed to make me sleep?" I asked, tossing the shoe on the floor.
"Why not? Now go to bed." she said... Sounding pissed might I add.
"What happened?" I asked.
It was dark, but I could hear her beginning to cry.
"Gracie, what the hell happened?" I asked, turning on my bedside lamp.
Her mascara was running like you wouldn't believe. She'd been crying for a while.
"Go back to sleep. You have a test tomorrow." she said wiping her face.
"Screw the test, what happened?" I walked over to Gracie and gave her a hug.
Once I did that, she latched on to me and wouldn't let go. I sat her down on her bed and grabbed a box of tissues.
"Whats wrong?" I asked, once again.
"He said we - We weren't right for each other..." she said, sobbing in between words.
"Oh, Gracie... I'm so sorry..."
"The only reason dumped me is because I wouldn't sleep with him!" she grabbed a few tissues and blew her nose.
That, I didn't have an answer for... She'd been with Cole for a while... I assumed they already... Well then.
"Did you ever sleep with Nick?" she asked.
Damnit... I was afraid she'd ask that.
"Well... Yeah... But that was because I was ready. Sweetie, if you aren't ready you shouldn't do anything!" I told her.
"I know... But you and Nick broke up... Don't you feel bad about doing that?" she asked.
"No. Because we were really in love. If Cole doesn't want you to wait, then he doesn't love you."
"Nick didn't pressure you?"
"Nope. He respected me." I explained. Damnit!! I didn't want to talk about this because it made me miss Nick.
"Well... I love Cole..." she sighed.
"No! Hell no, you aren't going to have sex with him so he'll get back with you." I said quickly.
"I love him so much!" she cried.
"He doesn't care about your feelings though." I told her.
After an hour, I finally convinced Gracie that doing something she doesn't wanna do won't make anything better.
Both of us were very tired... So we went to bed.
I fell asleep thinking about Nick. Again.
It was a long time ago...
"Nick, you have to promise me something..."
Nick and I were sitting on his couch in his basement, hanging out with Tyson.
Tyson went to the bathroom, so I thought I'd ask Nick a serious question.
He looked at me, prepared to answer.
"We'll always love each other?" I asked.
At the time... Oh man... His simple "Yes," answer, made me feel complete...
I needed to feel safe. And with Nick, I did.
I kissed him, which led to us making out, which then led to Tyson coming back in the room and jumping on top of us to break us up.
Sounds like Tyson, doesn't it?
I woke up to my cell phone alarm the next morning.
I took a shower, and headed to class.
After the test (which, I think I aced, by the way) I turned my cell phone back on.
I had a text message from a number I didn't recognize.
"We need to talk"
That was what it read. I didn't reply to the message, instead, I called the number.
The person answered on the second ring.
"Kammy?"
My heart skipped a beat.
"Nick?"