Playing God

School, over the next few days, became somewhat of a disregarded establishment. Instead I spent much of my days and part of the night at Louie’s bookstore. Louie my overwhelmingly nonchalant boss is a large Italian man with a knack for the accordion, which is how he spends most of his days at the shop. Louie is also the laziest and most anti social being in Connecticut, making me his one and only friend.

On Wednesday, the day after the historical double freak feature, Teddy tried to convince me that what happened in the locker room didn’t really happen, but I couldn’t be so sure. Instead I skipped school all together. Louie didn’t even glance up from playing his accordion when I walked in that morning.

“ No school today?” He asked with a disinterested yawn.

I replied with a quick “ No” and that was the end if it. I made it all the way till Saturday when normally coming in at four but instead came in at twelve, I received the devastating news.
“ I have a new Guy starting today,” Louie said to me as he made is way to the office. At the door he turned with a knowing look and continued with “ I’ll need you to train him for me.”

“ What!” I yelled. The only reason this job works out so well for me is because it is just the two of us. Louie and I. No one seems to be able to handle my illness except for Louie and no one comes in the crappy bookstore anyway! Why did we need a new guy? I rushed into the office. Loud annoying music came out of the world ugliest instrument, as I competed with the noise. “ WHAT! Louie we don’t need a new person!” Louie didn’t seem to have noticed me so I yelled louder! Again nothing. Finally I was forced to take drastic measures.

Mustering up all the straight I had I tipped over the filing cabinet next to the door. The crash of metal against the hard wood floor was deafening. That got Louie’s attention.
“ What the Hell Max!” Louie came to his feet quickly and I almost shrunk back. I had forgotten how big Louie is. I stood my ground and squared my shoulders.

“ Why in the world did you hire a new guys? We don’t need it. Look around, no one ever come here. You’ll just be wasting money.”

Louie casually walked over to the filing cabinet and set it back up right. The cabinet had to have weighed over a few hundred pounded but it appeared as light as a feather when he move it. Louie placed both hands on my shoulders and stared deep into my eyes.

“ Because,” long pause. “ I can.” And then he walked out of the office and out of the store. Great!

* * * * * *

As the hours passed I began to feel safe. Maybe this person wasn’t going to show up. I was busy stocking an order of books, which came in last week, on the top shelf when I heard someone clear their throat behind me.

“ One moment please. I’ll be right with you.” I climbed down the small latter and turned slightly to see the customer. I fell down the last rung on the latter and straight into the arms of the last person I thought to ever see here. “ YOU!” I hissed at the blond boy as I pushed against his chest to escape his arm.

“Me?” he looked at me with slight amusement and something else.

“ Get out!” I yelled in his face. His soft blond curls were cut shorter then last time I saw him in the locker room, and arranged neatly into a foe-hawk, but he still wore all black. This time he wore a pair of black jean that look as if they have never been worn and a black polo. I glances down as discreetly as I could to take in my over sized sweat pants and two times too big gray shirt.

“ Why are you kicking me out?” It took me a moment to realize he had spoken to me. My pause was too long and the look in his eyes was pure bewilderment. He probably thought that I was crazy. Which, I guess, I kind of am.

“ Because I have the right to refuse service to anyone I want and right now I am refusing you.” I stomped my way to the front on the store while he followed close behind. When I got to the door he placed his hand on the frame keeping me from opening it.
“ Ah but I’m not a costumer.”

NO!
“No! Your not----“ I couldn’t bring myself to finish the thought. But as it turned out I didn’t have to, he did it for me.

“ The new guy? Yes I am” He smiled a smile so bright I though I would go blind from it. “ So boss where do we start?”

“ We start with me firing you.”

“ I don’t think you can do that.” The confidence in his voice was unbearable. I knew he was right. I couldn’t fire him. In all honestly I didn’t even know him so my reaction was completely unwarranted. I sighed in defeat. The boy held out his hand to me and offered something I could have done without. His name.

“ I’m Logan Carr” I ignored his hand.

“ Max” was my only reply. I started waking back to the place where I left the shipment of books.

“ Max?” The sound of disgust was prominent. “ That’s a strange name for a girl. Tell me that it’s short for something.”

“ Mackenzie”

“ I may be mistaken but isn’t Mackenzie, although a pretty name, still male?” This boy was becoming greatly annoying.

“ What can I say? I am not what my mother always wanted.” I don’t look at him. I haven’t looked at him since I realized I was stuck with him. Even If I imagined the pleasure in his eyes as his friends harassed me, even if I imagined all of it I still didn’t trust him.

“You have a bit of a temper, don’t you? I admit I find it kind of sexy.” I looked at him then with a shocked expression. Did he just say I was sexy? My short hair was pulled up into a messy ponytail and my bangs hung low on my cheeks. Make up was something I used only as a deterrent. Maybe I once was pretty. My long red hair and dark hazel eyes made me exotic but I didn’t enjoy the attention. I did my best to make sure people knew that.

I rearranged my face into something more like a scowl and bark this first thing I could think of. “ Hurry up and help me with these books.” I climbed the latter quickly and tried not to remember how it felt being held in his arms when I fell off the first time.

“ Hand me those” I pointed to the pile I was working on earlier, when I didn’t feel a new book in my hands I look to see Logan wasn’t paying attention at all. Instead his head was tilted to the side and staring straight at my cleverly disguised butt.

“ Hey!” I climbed back down as fast as I could and placed my backside against the shelf.
“ I wonder if anyone knows what is under all of that” He was talking about my outfit, that I knew, but he wasn’t looking at my body but straight into my eyes. His eerie green stare made my uncomfortable.

“ Those who look beneath the surface do so at their own peril”
“ Oscar Wilde?” I couldn’t have been more shocked had he stripped naked and defecated on the floor “Deceiving others. That is what the world calls a romance.”

“ And do you believe that’s true.” Oscar Wilde is one of the great cynics in the world. He words are what got me through most of my down days. I could never be that cynical so therefore my world can’t be all that bad. I smile at the fact that he knows one of my favorite authors.

A charming smirk plays across his face that softens his already relaxed features. That when I realized I did something terrible wrong. I let my guard down. Automatically I work to build the wall back up. I feel my features harden where I let them slack. I can tell that he sees the difference because the smile is disappearing as I work to block him out. Out of the corner of my eyes I see a dark shadow form.

Oh Great! Teddy Help Me!

Sometimes I can use Teddy to help me through a hallucination, but he isn’t showing up. I haven’t learned how to access the part of my brain where Teddy lives so I never know when or where he will show up. The dark shadow builds bigger and bigger. Suddenly it erupts into flames that engulf the entire store. I look around but Logan isn’t anywhere in sight. The form that was growing inside the shadow is now I giant lion head, It’s mane a bright burning mixture of yellows and reds

I try to tell myself that it isn’t real. It doesn’t works though, it never does. I can feel the flames grow hotter. My skin is starting to boil. I run for the front door only to find that it isn’t there anymore. There is no sign of a door ever being there. I run around in circles and find no way to escape. The Lion is following me, stalking me like its much-awaited prey. I fall then. Tripping on something I can’t see. I curl myself into a ball and begin to chant.

It’s not real. It’s not real.

The Lion licks my flesh and I can smell burning meat. I hold back my scream. I don’t allow it anymore. At first I would scream every time I saw something what wasn’t. Now screaming is against the rules. I let myself scream the other day with Mr. Benson. I used but my quota for the month. The pain is building now and is getting harder to stand. I cant breath do to the smoke and my vision is blurring. Any moment ill black out and hopefully all will be right again with the world.

And it was. Just like that the pain stopped and I can feel the cool flow of air that is coming from the fan on the desk. I am sitting next to a pile of boxes (must have been what I tripped over) and Logan his sitting next to me on the floor. He has the biggest smile I have ever seem on a real person. Teddy wears the smile often but it looks different in the flesh.

Before I have a chance to feel embarrassed Logan grips my hand tightly in his. The smile hasn’t wavered off his face. It doesn’t feel right to me but I can make myself look away. Logan then reaches in his pocket and brings back a pen. Without breaking eye contact Logan writes something on my hand then gets up.

“ Soon.” was all he said before walking out of the store.

Huh?

Looking down I see a seven digit number written on my hand. Did he just give me his phone number?