Honey

Eliza sat on my couch, filing away at her nails. Her expression was a cross between annoyed, disinterested and nervous; Something I wasn't expecting to see before I had a date with Gerard.

"You okay?" Frank asked as I pulled a white T-shirt over my head. He smoothed the fabric down and moved so he was sitting down next to her on the couch.

She nodded. "Yeah, I just ... I feel like you shouldn't have gone to meet Josh."

Frank raised my brows. "You told me to go earlier. You seemed fine about it."

"I know," she mumbled. "I didn't want you to thank or feel like I didn't support your decisions. I mean, you're a grown man and I could tell you were upset when we had that little fight about it yesterday."

"Is that why you look all pissed and confused?"

Eliza shook her head, tossing the nail file on the coffee table. "No."

Frank leaned back in his seat and placed his hands behind his head, trying to feel relaxed. Deep down he wasn't so sure he wanted to know what was bothering her. "Then what is it?"

"Gerard stopped by again after you left."

"And?" Frank replied, his heart speeding up.

"He asked where you were! I mean, what do you think he stopped by for?"

"Well? What did you tell him?" His tone was shocked, rushed, and worried.

Eliza shrugged. "I don't know... I just... I freaked out and told him you were busy. I don't even know what I was talking about; he probably thought I'd gone nuts."

She was truly distressed, and Frank could tell by the look on her face that she was worried about his relationship with Gerard. However, he was glad she hadn't mentioned the truth. As terrible as it was, he never planned on telling Gerard that he'd gone to lunch with Josh. It didn't matter that nothing had happened, the mere fact that it was lunch with Josh made the whole event look and sound sketchy.

"Did he seem suspicious?"

Eliza nodded. "Yeah. Of course he did, I was mumbling shit like a fucking idiot."

Frank sat down on the floor and buried his face in his hands. His face was growing hot, he could feel it. It was as if the world was collapsing on top of him. The first good thing he'd had since the break-up with Josh was slipping through his fingers; He could feel it.

"What do I do?" Frank asked. "I know he's gonna ask me about it."

"Did he try calling you?"

"I haven't looked at my phone," he said, fishing his phone from his pocket and checking the call records. "Shit."

"He did?"

Frank nodded. "Yeah. I never turned the ringer on because I put it on silent during work."

Frank didn't know what to do. It was almost six and Gerard was due to show up any minute. Knowing him, he would show up early, that goofy smile on his lips. Just the thought of it made his insides crumble. Frank laid back and covered his face with his hands as he heard Eliza cross the room and move toward the front door.

"I hate to leave you like this, but Gerard is gonna be here soon and I don't think I should be here when he shows up. You know, in case you guys need to talk."

Frank peeked through his fingers as Eliza's hand found the doorknob. "It's okay. I get it. Have fun talking to Michael all night," He said, forcing a smile.

Eliza chuckled. "I hope things work out for you," she said, opening the door. "And put some damn pants on. You cant get the door in your underwear."

As she said this Gerard appeared from behind the door. Eliza's hand flew to her mouth as a blush crept onto her cheeks. "Well.... I think I'll be going now, she said. "Hello, Gerard."

Gerard waved, a polite smile on his face. "Hello to you too, Eliza," he said.

He walked inside, closing the door behind Eliza. Frank sat up, trying his best to cover up the fact that he wasn't wearing any pants. He smiled and waved toward Gerard. "Hey..."

Gerard waved back. "I stopped by your job earlier... a little while after I left."

"Eliza told me just now."

Gerard sat down next to Frank, his gaze dropping toward his underwear. Frank's cheeks grew warmer. "Well... you weren't there. According to Eliza's gibberish, you were 'out'."

"I was."

Gerard waited for an explanation Frank didn't quite have. When he didn't say anything, he raised his brows. "Well? What happened?"

Frank sighed. "I... I don't think I can tell you," Gerard's eyes grew wary. "It's nothing bad, it's just... I feel like I can't tell you."

Gerard's facial expression resembled disappointment. A feeling Frank hated when it was geared in his direction. "It's not bad, but you can't tell me?" He asked.

Frank nodded, avoiding his gaze. "Yeah."

"That doesn't really help much, you know," Gerard said.

His voice was one Frank didn't quite recognize. It was sad and angry. It was everything his usual, happy, goofy, caring tone wasn't. It made Frank grow disappointed in himself.

"I'm sorry," Frank mumbled, feeling like his heart was going to implode within his chest.

"That doesn't really solve anything, Frank. I don't want you to think that I have you on some sort of leash, but I feel like I should have some right to ask where you went."

"You do, I totally agree with that, but I don't want you to be upset with me," Frank confessed. "I feel like I like you and you like me too and... I don't know, I don't want to mess things up."

Gerard nodded, his expression softening. "I do like you, Frank," he said. "That's why I stopped by again after I left. I wanted to talk to you about where we stood, you know, relationship wise."

Frank's eyes widened. "What do you mean?"

Gerard blushed, that familiar smile, the one Frank loved, finding his lips. "I wanted to know if, you know, if I could call you mine and you could call me yours."

Frank's heart fluttered in a way it had never fluttered before. Even after he'd fallen into what he felt to be love with Josh, he'd never felt the way he felt in that moment. But it hit him that he wouldn't be able to do that with Gerard until the air had been cleared.

"I'd love to call you mine, Gerard," Frank said. "But... I feel like we need to talk about things first."

"Like?" Gerard asked, sounding worried.

"I went to see my ex-boyfriend today," Frank said. "When you came by today, that's where I was."

Gerard furrowed his brow. "Are you guys like... what-"

"No," Frank interrupted, placing a hand on Gerard's shoulder. "We aren't. I went to see him because he called me the other day and.. I hadn't spoken to him in a while. He asked if we could meet up and talk about things and I decided to go because I felt it was the right thing."

Frank watched as Gerard leaned back, resting his weight on his open palms. He wasn't sure what Gerard was thinking, but he was sure it wasn't something pleasant. "If it was the right thing, why couldn't you tell me? If it was right, why would I be upset?"

Frank sighed, not knowing what the word 'right' meant anymore. "Because of the fact that it was my ex-boyfriend and we..."

Gerard's eyes widened, but only slightly. "'we' what?"

"We have history, Gerard. You have to understand that Josh and I were together for a long time. I'm not saying that changes anything you and I have going on, but it still means something."

"Do you love him?" Gerard asked. He made the question sound simple when it really wasn't.

Frank shrugged. "That's a loaded question, Gerard. No matter what I say I feel like you won't be happy with the answer."

"You already know what the right answer is, Frank."

"You can't just stop loving someone altogether, Gerard. I love Josh, but not in the same way I used to."

When Gerard didn't say anything, Frank moved closer so he was sitting directly next to him. "Gerard... you have to believe that Josh and I are finished. I have no desire to get back together with him. He knows that now and that is really all that matters."

"You told him about me?" Gerard asked.

Frank nodded. "Yeah. Why wouldn't I?"

Gerard's lips curled upward into a smile. He shrugged. "I don't know... For a minute there I wasn't sure what to think."

Frank leaned in toward Gerard, wrapping his arms around his shoulders. He kissed the curve of Gerard's jawline. "I'm sorry," Frank mumbled into Gerard's skin. "For not telling you. I was afraid you'd be too upset with me for going."

Gerard nodded, his fingers tracing patterns into the back of Frank's shirt. He kissed his hair. "It's okay. I understand."

Frank smiled and looked up at Gerard. Gerard smiled back and pecked Frank lips. "Mine?" He asked, moving a few stray hairs from Frank's face.

Frank kissed Gerard, taking the time to appreciate the taste of Double-mint Gum and cigarettes. When he pulled away his fingers were tangled in the dark locks of Gerard's hair. "Yours."