Cloaks and Daggers

I took my last draining step and entered the small concrete cave under the highway bridge. As I tried to catch my breath, my empty hand flew and slammed to the dirty stone. I lifted my other hand to examine the beautiful stolen turkey sandwich. A worn-out, greedy smile made it’s way onto my face. My blistered fingers struggled to work with the wrapper while the rest of my body hit and slid down the gritty cave wall. The tips of my fingers caught a break in the plastic wrap and tore it to pieces. In an instant, the left half of the cut sandwich was between my teeth. It tasted wonderful. It was the most delicious turkey sandwich I had ever eaten.

And to think, my beautiful moment of pure bliss was interrupted by a whopping cough. First, my head turned to my left, then my eyes made their way over, too. I pursed my stuffed lips and I wrinkled my forehead. Two meters to my left was a cloaked figure. A cloaked, dirty figure. All I could see was his a-gape lips and tilted head--a head tilted directly at the other half of my sandwich.

I looked down at my sandwich, then I looked at the stranger again. Then I looked at my sandwich. I worked hard for this sandwich! I risked my own skin! All he did was sit around in this cave. So, I lifted the other half to my mouth and--stopped. Without looking to my left, I swallowed, snapping the sandwich out to my side with my left hand. There was a moment’s pause, so I shook the sandwich in an irritating but reassuring manner, and the stranger gasped. He scurried over to my hand quickly and snatched up the sandwich. Once I dropped my hand, I let my eyes wander over to him in curiosity. Amazingly, I watched him shove the last bite into his mouth. Then I turned my eyes away. They made their own way to my lap.

“Thank you!” The stranger thanked me, scooting even closer. I gave him a weird look for scooting closer, then nodded while looking away.

After that, we sat in silence until dark. Occasionally, I would look over, and occasionally, he would be looking back. When that happened, I didn’t look again for a long time. It was… painfully awkward. But it soon got to the point where I was shivering in my light clothing and the silence was broke.

“Are you cold?” the stranger asked. My head moved in his direction.

“Hm? Yeah, sorta,” I turned my head back to my lap.

“Sorta? You look like you’re dieing!” he let out a chuckle after that as if he had told a joke. I looked at him for a brief moment before answering.

“So? There’s not much I can do about it.”

“Well, I’m cold, too.”

My eyes narrowed.

“What are you talking about?”

“Since we’re both cold, shouldn’t we warm each other up?”

My eyes blinked with shock one moment, then the next with fury.

“What?” Even though I will deny it. Even though I can convince almost anyone otherwise, my face was getting rather heated from his remark. Rather pink. The stranger looked at me and looked at me for a very long time.

“I thought you were cold, but you look quite hot.” he said, genuinely turned around.

“W-well, I--”

“Or could it be that you’re blushing?” and this he said without a slight hint of teasing. It was, I’m sure, a complete surprise to him. “I didn’t mean it in a sexual way, at all, if that’s what you’re thinking.”

“No-no, I… it’s just, you know.. It is the eighties,” I said, my head cast down and my blistered fingers working their magic on my scalp. He laughed at this.

“Yeah, it is.”

Then he shuffled his butt over to me and wrapped his arm and blanket around my shoulder. He pulled me closer to him so he could connect the arm around me with his other blanketed arm. I cleared my throat awkwardly and he sighed in relief. Indeed, it was much warmer like this.

Once more, we sat in silence. I could feel his body moving with the rhythm of his breathing. Though I will also deny this, it was comforting and it soothed me and I was warm. And though I was enjoying every aspect of this situation physically, my mind was still stumped that I was in fact cuddling with this dirty stranger.

Just today, I told myself. just right now.

A moment after my conclusion, the man tilted his head down to the level of mine and spoke with a curved smile.

“You warm?”

I looked up at him as his head returned to it’s prior position and touched his eyes with mine.

“Yes.”

He smiled bigger and let out his breath. “Good!” he said, rubbing his hands to and fro upon my arm as a comforting and warming act. I laughed at this and looked at him once more with humor.

“You’re like a mom,”

He looked at me like he was offended but it was overrun with curiosity.

“What?”

“Well, you’re all comforting me and worrying over my temperature.. It’s like a mom. Very mom-ish,” I said, laughing again.

“Oh! And I thought I was getting somewhere with you!” he said laughing with me, now.

But my smile dropped and was replaced with shock. I broke from his hold in equal shock.

“What? You were hitting on me?”

“Hm?” he said, genuinely surprised. “You didn’t know?”

I waited before I answered. And I took my first real look at him. He was grimy, sure, but he wasn’t ugly. Not at all.

“Not at all…” I let slip out, and regretted it immediately. The man was clearly taken aback by this and I felt bad because I didn’t mean it in that way, my thoughts had just slipped out. But at the same time, I’m not gay. There’s nothing I can do about it. But he was..

Only him, I reassured myself, making my last exception. Only because it’s him.

“But it’s okay,” when I said it, it felt like I was giving the wrong line in a school play.

“Really?”

I nodded. “Yeah,”

He smiled. “Well, I’m starting to get cold, eh?” and he beckoned for me to go back to him. I did according so, my heart beating all the while.

What I was doing, I don’t know. Why, out of everyone in the world, I would allow this to be with him, I don’t know. He wasn’t anything special. He was less than ordinary. He was a hobo. But, there are just some things I can’t explain.

This time, when he wrapped his arms around me, he held me closer. My heart stuttered just as if my foot had slid on a step. And this time, I was able to lie my head on his shoulder and he didn’t reject it. Our chests hummed and I soon fell asleep.

Sometimes
lives intersect
no rhyme, no reason

I awoke slowly, like in a book. Like in a movie. I stared at the ceiling, then looked to my left. I watched his chest heave up and down, like that night.

His eyes open quickly and connected with mine.

“You’re awake?” I asked.

“I am now,” he said. He was different but the same from that night. He had let his hair grow out. He had actually started to grow a beer belly, which I found hilarious. I was staring at it when he noticed. “What?”

“Guess what? I had a dream about the night we met, do you remember?”

He started laughing. “How could I forget? You dragged me home with you after,”

“Fuck you!” I said jokingly, as I tried to push him off the bed. It only backfired and ended with me falling off the bed. In frustration, I reached up and pulled the blanket off the bed and rolled up in it on the floor.

“Goodnight,” I said, closing my eyes.

“Hey, maybe you’ll have a dream about the first time we fu--”

“Goodnight.”