Lousy Truth

Two days later, I wake up looking at the ceiling a foot and a half above me. I slowly remember how alcohol was quickly brought out last night after everyone was finally here and how we drank and partied until early in the morning. I don’t remember passing out in my bunk though.

I extract myself and fall gracelessly to the ground. Steadying myself, I wobble as the headache hits me. Bloods rushes through as my vision swims. I close my eyes against the pain and lean against the wall.

A hand nudges me and passes along a cup of water and two Tylenols. I mumble thanks and quickly swallow the pills. Slowly opening my eyes, I squint at David. He chuckles at me and messes up my hair.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone so small drink so much,” he teases me and I groan a little.

“Too loud…” I mutter and start walking for the bathroom. David laughs at me and I repress the urge to flip him off.

The toilet flushing behind me, I exit the bathroom, feeling a little more human. I look around the bus and see David in the back with his laptop out.

“Where’s everyone?” I ask as I sit next to him, my head falling back as my eyes close.

“In the hotel with nice comfy beds. And showers… Nice, hot showers…” His eyes get a faraway look in them and I poke him.

“It’s way too soon to be longing for a hot shower.” I point out and he smiles.

“I’m kind of a girl. I need my showers and my sleep. Otherwise, watch out ‘cause I will kill you.” He tries to make a scary face but it doesn’t work. He’s too cute to look threatening. Stretching a little, I slump back down onto the couch quickly.

I sit there for a minute, thinking about what I should do next. Our first show is tonight in London. The venue is actually right across the street from the hotel, so luckily we don’t have to go very far today.

“I guess I’ll go in and steal the shower from someone…” I get up and head for my suitcase. Gathering some clothes, I leave David alone in the bus. I call Ace and he tells me what room he and Jon are in. Soon enough, I’m knocking at their door and locking myself in the bathroom.

The hot steam from the shower clouding the mirror, I dry off with the thin hotel towels. I pull on my tights, setting them straight before wiggling into my blue dress. Grabbing the hair dryer, I turn it on and let the hot air blast my hair into oblivion. When the last of the water is gone, I brush it out and add some soft curls into my long brown hair.

Leaning closer to the mirror, I place my white hat and secure it with some bobby pins. A little mascara and eyeliner later, I’m just about finished. I grab the jewelry from yesterday and put the earrings back on, sliding the necklace into place.

I open the bathroom door and the steam escapes quickly into the colder hotel room. Ace runs past me, doing the potty dance as he closes the door.

I laugh and sit next to Jon on his bed. He’s flipping through the stations in a trance. I poke him and he jumps, surprised. He looks over at me and gives me an uneasy smile.

“You need to stop poking people…” he glares a little but it melts in front of my bright, I’m-so-innocent smile. “Anyway… Sound check is at six. Doors open at six-thirty. Until then, we have nothing to do.”

Sighing in annoyance, I flop back onto his bed, already messing up my hat. “But what are we gonna do?” I whine, not excited at the prospect of just sitting around until tonight. I check the clock next to the bed and notice it’s already noon.

“As soon as Ace is outta the bathroom, let’s go get some food? Maybe we can go sightsee a little too. Just an idea.” I shrug. Sightseeing has never been my thing. I hate seeing what everyone comes to see. I like finding the hidden, local’s only places. Those types of places are the only ones that can really show you want the place is like.

Ace comes out of the bathroom, looking considerably relieved and I giggle a little. He throws a pillow at me and misses. I catch it off the floor and lob it back at him. He whines when his hair gets messed up. Jon rolls his eyes at us and pushes my legs until I sit up.

“Food. Shopping. Whatever, let’s goooooo.” Jon looks bored and I slip my feet into my white high heel boots. Ace tries to be fun and fakes pushing me over. I slap the back of his head as Jon herds us out the door. We collect people from different bands until there’s a large group of us heading for a restaurant the front desk recommended.

After having a little trouble finding it, we get seated in the middle of the room, four tables pushed together. I look around at the circle of my friends, new friends, and people I don’t know yet. Smiling to myself, I have a feeling I’m going to have fun on this tour.

--

“Quinn! Hurry up!” Jon yells at me as he leaves the dressing room. I shoo him away as I take off my hat, trying to tame those curls I put in earlier. Sighing as I try this and that, I decide to just brush them out finally.

Someone steps up to the dressing room, stopping there. Since I’m looking down at my hair as I violently brush out the curls, I just assume it’s someone telling me to hurry up.

“I’ll be just a second.” The person clears their throat and hesitates.

“I was hoping you could spare more than a second…” I look up quickly and try to control myself as my heart races.

“Oli…” I turn sharply, facing the mirror. I look into it and I refuse to meet his eyes. I know he’s staring at me, I know he’s waiting for me to turn back around and talk to him. But I can’t. My breath hitches in my throat and I realize I’m about to cry. I stopped caring, but now he’s making me remember.

“Go away.” I steel myself and I look into the reflection of his eyes. He looks down and I pick up my hair brush. I grab my hair, focusing on brushing it. I hear footsteps and relax. He’s gone now, thank –

Light, gentle touches spark fire down my back until I realize Oli’s just a few inches away from me. He leans down a little and kisses the exposed skin of my shoulder. I shudder with memories and lean back into him, lost in my thoughts. His arms come around my waist as he holds me closer. I can feel his breath on my skin, his face tucked into my neck.

I’m uncomfortable, but I can’t stand the thought of moving away. I play with the ends of my hair as I try to stop the tears. My breath hitches again as tears drop straight down my face. And then I feel wetness on my neck. Something snaps and I turn in his arms, my own pulling him tighter against me. I wrap myself against him, the tears falling as my heart breaks again. I can feel his own against my hair until I push him away.

“Don’t tease me. I can’t afford to get my heart broken again. Don’t think you can come in here and pretend that what you did can be forgotten. You killed a part of me that can’t be replaced. So just… go. Now.” He stands there, obviously stunned. “I can’t stand to be around you. So just go.” He continues to stand there and then his brow furrows and he takes a step closer to me. I stop him with my hand and I have to consciously stop my fingers from gripping his shirt and pulling him close again.

“Go. If you ever really loved me, go.” Heartbeats pass and I look down, unable to look at him anymore. “Please…”

He shakes his head and grabs my arm, using it to pull me into him. I trip back into his arms. There’s fury in his eyes, but so much sadness too. “No. I’m not going anywhere. I made the biggest mistake this summer letting you go and I’m not about to make it again.”

I tug my arm, trying to get away from him. I can’t believe anything he says. I can’t believe that he’s back.

“Quinn, I love you. It took me a long time to figure out just how much, but this month has killed me. I miss you so much because you’re everything that I want in my life.” I close my eyes, hiding from the pain that he’s causing me.

“You killed me.”

“And I should never have done that. But I’m here now and I love you. Don’t push me away.” I sigh and look back at up him.

“Give me a reason to put myself out there again. Tell me why I should allow myself to become vulnerable.” I wait for him to say something. When a minute passes, I bite my lower lip and look away, taking a step back.

“I love you.”

“You said you loved me back then too. And you still crushed me like a bug.” The words barely make it over a whisper and I look at him. Sighing, I rise up on my toes and brush my lips against his.

“You’re right. You made the biggest mistake letting me go.” I push past him and leave the dressing room, ignoring the pain.