Love Is Hell

I slowly opened my eyes.

I blinked a few times, trying to take in my surroundings. I was lying on an uneven surface and my neck was cramping. My vision focused in on a pair of bare feet that seemed to be radiating off a foul smell. I wrinkled my nose and tried to sit up but something was keeping me in place.

I turned around and found a softly snoring Garrett. He was facing me and his arm was casually draped over me. I smiled at the sight. He looked so innocent asleep. I slowly tried to shimmy my way out from under his arm without waking him. Once successful I quietly stood up and looked around.

Now I remembered that we all fell asleep on the beach last night. Everyone was passed out around the fire that must have died in the early morning. I remember most of the guys got pretty plastered and just started crashing in random places. I silently laughed as I saw Max who made it halfway to the bus, but ended up passing out 10 feet away.

Quietly, I weaved my way through the sleeping bodies and towards the bus. Once I climbed onto the bus I made my way over to my bunk, grabbing my bag and taking out my phone. I furrowed my brow when I noticed that I had four missed calls from Amy. It must have been important if she called four times.

Confused and slightly concerned, I walked off the bus and started dialing Amy's number. I walked over towards the water, away from the guys so I wouldn't wake them.

"Finally Lo! I was beginning to worry!" She exclaimed when she answered after the third ring.

"Honestly Lorraine, I tried calling like fifty times, but you didn't answer and then I started thinking that maybe something bad happened and I would have to be the one to tell the governor that his daughter was kidnapped and could possibly be lying dead somewhere in a ditch in the desert!" She rambled on.

I rolled my eyes, but smiled, missing her crazy antics, "I'm fine Amy. I'm sorry I didn't answer your four missed calls, I was busy. And also I wasn't kidnapped and I'm definitely not dead in a ditch. But thank you for your concern." I added, shaking my head.

"You never know," she mumbled. "It just would be nice to hear from you now and then so I at least know your alive."

I nodded, "I'm sorry. I'll text you from now on."

I heard her sigh on the other end and agree. Then I realized that even though she didn't call me fifty times, she still did call four and that was strange for her. She wouldn't call that many times unless it was important.

"So was there something you needed to tell me?" I asked after a moment of silence.

"Oh!" She exclaimed, seeming like she just remembered why she even called, "Well remember that article I sent you online?"

"Yeah..." I replied, thinking back on the huge "Missing" article that my parents put out.

"Yeah, well now it's all over the newspapers, news, everywhere. I actually think they're really worried about you Lo."

I rolled my eyes, knowing better than to think that.

"No Amy, they're worried about the publicity that this will give them. Whether or not it'll be big enough or if all of this is giving them the wrong image. Trust me, they're not worried about me." I whispered back harshly.

Amy sighed, knowing not to argue with me.

"Ok well, just be careful. I don't know if you're planning to come home on your own or not because I'm sure that all this shit about you will get printed in other papers and people will be looking for you." She explained.

I groaned, knowing that she was right.

"Hey, you ok?"

I jumped, almost dropping the phone, and quickly turned around. Garrett was standing there looking at me expectantly.

"Uh I'll talk to you later, ok?" I told her before hanging up, not waiting for her reply. I then turned around and faced Garrett. "Hey."

He nodded towards my phone, "Who was that?" He asked.

I shrugged, "My friend. When did you wake up?" I asked, changing the subject. There was no reason telling any of them about what was going on. For now there was no reason to involve them.

"A few minutes ago. All the guys are getting up now. Just wanted to come and let you know that we're going to be leaving soon."

I nodded and followed him up the beach and towards the bus. All the guys were up and packing up everything onto the bus. When we reached them, Max began ushering us onto the bus, mumbling something about how we were already running late.

We all climbed onto the bus and once everyone was on we were on our way.

All the guys sat down and started talking. Instead of joining them, I made my way back towards the bunks. I climbed into mine and closed the curtain. Sighing, I turned over towards the wall and closed my eyes. I didn't want to deal with anything right now. I didn't even want to think. I just wanted to forget about everything right now, if only for a few hours.

&&

I woke to the sound of loud voices. I groaned and rolled over. Pulling back the curtain, I peeked my head out. All the guys were in the front and talking and laughing loudly. They seemed quite hyper, like they usually were after performing.

Confused, I jumped out of my bunk and stretched before walking towards the front.

"Sleeping beauty's finally up!" John exclaimed when they noticed me.

I sat down next to Garrett on the couch and ran my hand through my hair, "How long was I asleep for?" I asked.

Garrett laughed, "Practically the whole day. It's like 10:30."

No wonder they were all hyper and sweaty, they did just finish a show.

"Wait, why didn't you guys wake me before the show?"

John shrugged, "Garrett told us not to. He said you looked peaceful and he didn't want anyone to wake you. We practically had to play the silent game until we got to the venue."

I looked over at Garrett who just shrugged.

The bus, which I didn't notice was even moving, came to an abrupt stop. Leon then called back to us, saying that we were here.

Kennedy, Jared, and Aaron stood up and made their way towards the door. "We're getting some food at a gas station," Kennedy called to me, "Do you want to come?" He asked.

I nodded and stood up. My legs were a bit cramped and I wanted to walk around. I followed them off the bus as Max shouted at us to be quick. Kennedy waved his hand in acknowledgement as we walked into the convenient store.

When we entered the store Jared and Aaron went straight to the candy section while Kennedy walked towards the drinks. Not really interested in eating, I just walked around, waiting for them. As I walked by the magazine rack something caught my eye.

"You've got to be kidding me." I gasped as I grabbed the magazine off the stand.

It was a popular magazine, some kind of gossip one. Usually the Kardashian's or some other stars decorated the cover of the magazine. However, I stared in horror at my own face that now covered the whole entire front of the magazine.

I quickly flipped it open and to the article. "Beloved Daughter of Arizona Governor Missing" was printed at the top of the page in big, bold letters. There were pictures of me and my parents and the same picture of my mother crying that I hated so much.

I looked at the stand and saw a full stack of the same magazines. I was about to try hiding the magazines, but I heard footsteps approach me from behind. I quickly turned around in front of the magazines and held the one in my hand against my body.

"Jared and Aaron are just paying and then we're going." Kennedy said as he walked over to me. He noticed my weird behavior and glanced down at the magazine that I was clutching for dear life against my body.

"What do you have there?" He asked as he eyed me.

I just shook my head, "Oh nothing," I managed to choke out.

Unconvinced, he reached down and quickly snatched the magazine from my grip.

I closed my eyes and bit my lip, not wanting to see his reaction. It was quiet for a few minutes and I was beginning to think he and the rest of the guys got on the bus and left without me. I slowly opened my eyes to find Kennedy still standing there reading the magazine.

I decided to start explaining now before it was too late. "Ok so I know it seems bad," I began.

Kennedy scoffed and closed the magazine, "Seems bad? Lo, this is fucked up," he said as he showed me the front of the magazine.

I physically cringed as I glanced at my face on the cover.

"I know, and I'm sorry. Honestly if you just want to drop me off at a hotel somewhere I'll be fine. I really don't want to cause any problems, that wasn't my intention. I didn't mean for this to happen." I explained.

Kennedy sighed, "We're not going to just drop you off at a hotel and leave you Lorraine. And you're not causing any problems. This isn't your fault." He said as he waved the magazine in the air. I cringed again, just wishing he'd put it down so I wouldn't have to look at it.

"What do you mean it's not my fault? Of course it is." I asked, confused because I thought he was mad.

He shook his head, "Lorraine, you didn't do this. Your parents did."

"Don't remind me," I mumbled, "They know I ran away and wasn't kidnapped."

"Exactly," Kennedy said, "It's not your fault they're being ignorant."

I nodded, "So you're not mad at me?" I asked, looking up at him.

He shook his head and smiled lightly, "No, I feel bad because what your parents are doing is bullshit and you don't deserve it. They should understand that sometimes people just want to get away for a bit."

I smiled, about to thank Kennedy for being so understanding when Aaron and Jared came over. "We're ready." Jared said.

Kennedy nodded, "Ok," he replied as he casually put the magazine back on the rack, covering the rest of the magazines and facing backwards. He smiled over at me and we followed Jared and Aaron out of the store.

As the guys were climbing back onto the bus, Kennedy grabbed my arm.

"For now, let's not tell anyone. I'm not sure how some of them will react." He whispered in my ear before he got on the bus.

I sighed, knowing he was right. I could think of a certain bronze haired boy who's reaction I was particularly worried about. For now it was better if they were left in the dark about this. But who knew how long that would last.