When Beginnings End

I know I shouldn't do this. I'll ruin so many lives by doing this, but the only one I care about is my own – because I'm the only one who cares about my life.

I still know I shouldn't be doing this. I have more to live for, I know that. Just because nothing worked out the way I wanted it to, doesn't mean everything else won't work out. I just need new goals.

I just can't think of any.

I have no one to live for anymore. Right now, I can only think of one person to live for, and that person doesn't care about me. He acknowledges my existence and that's about it.

I know I shouldn't be doing this, but I will anyways. I know I will ruin my own life by taking it away, and I know I will ruin the life of the person who's gonna hit me, but maybe he or she deserves it. Maybe whoever is driving that car deserves to see the world differently. Perhaps that person will go home, hug his or her children, kiss their spouse, cal their mother and...

Maybe they'll go home and live happily ever after.

Unlike me.

I won't go home. Soon, I won't have a home anymore. I don't have a family to go home to. I don't have a mother to call. I have no one to comfort me.

I look down the road and see the light turn from yellow and red to green. The headlights from the cars seem to brighten up – as if the cars are happy to drive and not stand still.

I feel like the air is punched out of me as the cars come racing towards me. My head starts to spin and it becomes harder to breathe. The cars keep coming closer and though it's completely dark I can still tell what color they are from such a great distance.

They're close now.

I look down at the ground and step forward.

The cars swish past me, the lights blinding me and the wind knocking me back a bit. A truck comes hurling past me and I fall onto my ass.

My feet wouldn't move. They just didn't work. Maybe they are controlled by my unconsciousness telling me not to do this, but I need to do this! I can't go back now. There's no way back from here. Everything is ruined and I can't fix it and I just need to go away.

I get up onto my feet and stumble a bit. I brush the dirt off of me, as if it actually matters. I-
I fly. I feel no pain, no worries, no wind. I just fly through the air. I don't even feel myself landing. I can hear the cracks, crunches and clicks, but I don't register any pain.

I did it.

The world starts going bright. It's then that I realize that everything went black for a while, but now, it's all bright.

Someone is standing over me. It's a man. His skin is really bright and his hair is completely opposite. Or maybe he's just wearing a hat.

“Can you hear me?” he whispers. I think. He may be yelling, though. His mouth opens really wide as he says those words.
“My name is Gee, what's yours?”

I suddenly see his eyes clearly. They're golden.