Let Me In

“Monkeys!”

“Lions!”

“No way little dude, the monkeys were the coolest animals there today!”

Beth shook her head and smiled at the exchange that was taking place between Brian and Nate whilst she drove. To say that their trip to the zoo had been a success was a slight understatement. She had been a little apprehensive that the idea of spending an entire day in Brian’s company would end up becoming a daunting prospect for Nate. However, from the minute she and Brian had arrived at her parents’ home that morning to collect him, he had never left Brian’s side, aside from when they had been in the car. Beth had almost felt a little redundant as it had been Brian’s hand Nate had chosen to hold or shoulders he had sat on as they had walked around the zoo. Yet she hadn’t minded one bit. It was important to her that they formed a bond, because she knew Brian wasn’t going to just disappear from their lives overnight, and to have her son accept and be comfortable with him was so vital.

Glancing in the rearview mirror, Beth caught Nate yawning.

“Tired kiddo?” she asked, gaining a nod in response.

“Okay, well how about we have dinner when we get in, then it’ll be bath and bed for you buddy. Any ideas what you want?”

Nate sat quietly for a moment, giving the subject some thought.

“Pork chops, and Brian!”

Brian winked at Beth as he turned in the passenger seat to look back at Nate.

“You wanna eat me?” he asked, pretending to be shocked, causing Nate to laugh.

“No,you stay!” he cried, smiling.

“Thank God! Cos I was going to say, I don’t think I’d fit on the plate!” Brian added with a grin.

“Brian may have stuff to do Nate,” Beth suggested, not wanting Brian to feel pressured into staying with them.

Brian turned back to face Beth and shook his head.

“No, no plans. In fact, I was kinda hoping that today didn’t have to end just yet anyway, I’ve had a great time. I’d love to stay for dinner,” he admitted with a smile.

Beth continued to drive towards home, feeling perfectly content that Brian wanted to spend more time with them. As they neared her street, Brian admired a Dodge Charger that passed them. Beth pulled a face as he complimented it.

“Colby and his brother are mad on them, so forgive me if I don’t return the enthusiasm,” she muttered with an apologetic smile. “Especially as that one looks exactly like Dylan’s,” she added, the smile disappearing a little.

Brian sighed, resting his hand on her thigh, squeezing it gently to show he understood. Since the night Beth had told him all about Nate, she had gradually filled him in on how her life had been since he had been born. It turned out that Colby was not alone in being unaccepting of his son. His parents and brother rarely had the time of day for him, having practically shunned him from the day they too had received the news regarding his autism. It was something Brian still found a little difficult to grasp, how anyone could try and deny a child’s existence. He knew he had only spent a handful of hours in Nate’s company, yet aside from a couple of moments where he had drifted off into a little world of his own, and his occasional reluctance to respond verbally, Brian saw nothing more than a cheerful, exceptionally cool kid.

Once they had arrived back at the apartment, Beth set about making dinner, whilst Brian settled himself at the table with Nate who wanted to occupy himself with some drawing. She smiled at the sound of Brian protesting to Nate that his stickmen were the best he’d ever drawn as Nate laughed, clearly amused by Brian’s apparent “work of art.”

As she prepared some vegetables, Beth jumped a little as she felt two arms snake around her waist. She let out a contented sigh at the feel of Brian’s lips against her neck.

“You need me to do anything?” he asked.

Placing the knife down on the chopping board, Beth turned in his arms, resting her hands on his shoulders.

“Not that I can think of, and besides, you’ve done more than enough today…thank you,” she answered softly.

“Thank you?” Brian questioned, a little confused.

“Yes, thank you. You approached today with a completely open mind and treated Nate exactly how I wish others would treat him. There are times when you have to make allowances for his autism, but the rest of the time, he just needs to be treated like a normal kid, it helps nurture him. And that’s what you’ve done today. You’ve not tip-toed around him, and it’s been wonderful to see. Especially as he’s responded so well to it…he’s like a whole new Nate today,” Beth explained with a smile.

“Well then you’re welcome,” Brian replied before kissing her gently.

A loud persistent knocking on the front door prevented Brian from going any further.

“You expecting anyone?” he mumbled, his lips still attached to Beth’s.

“No, unless Jen’s driven past, seen your car still here and is being nosey,” Beth suggested, pulling away.

“Want me to go see?”

“Please,” Beth nodded, returning her attention to getting dinner ready.

Placing some broccoli in a pan that was sitting on the hob, Beth almost dropped the chopping board as a voice rang through the peaceful silence of the apartment.

“Who the fuck are you?”

Practically tripping over her own feet in her haste to get to the door, Beth noticed that Brian was keeping himself firmly in place, not allowing their visitor to enter just yet.

“Do you wanna maybe step aside buddy, so I can get in, see my wife and son.”

“Think that’s something for Beth to decide.”

“It’s okay Bri, I got this,” Beth stated quietly.

Brian glanced at her and nodded.

“I’ll just go and…” he trailed off, gesturing his head in the direction of the lounge, letting Beth know that he would sit with Nate while she tried to find out just why Colby was there.

“Why are you here Colby?” she enquired cooly.

“Oh c’mon Bethy, don’t be like this. Why do you think I’m here?” Colby responded, his smile as fake as they came.

“To make our lives as awkward as possible…and don’t call me Bethy, you know how much I hate that.”

Colby gave a cocksure smirk, and attempted to step inside.

“Don’t try and stop me Bethy, he’s my son, and I’ve been trying to get to see him all day. Had me a little confused when I discovered you weren‘t at home, but maybe that’s because you and your little friend Bri were out playing happy families with my kid for the day,” he hissed, pushing past her.

“Colby wait!”

Following him quickly, Beth tried in vain to prevent him from surprising Nate. Brian stood from where he was knelt by the young boy, almost as if ready to intervene should he need to. Beth made to move beside Nate, only for Colby to block her and get to him before she could.

“Hey buddy, how’s it going?” he asked Nate, whose deep brown eyes looked up at him in horror.

“No!” he yelled, shrinking back in the chair.

“It’s okay Nate, your mom and I are here,” Brian soothed, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder, all the while eyeing Colby.

“Aww, c’mon Nate, I thought you’d be happy to see me, it’s been a while,” Colby continued, stepping forward with open arms ready to embrace his son.

Before any of them had a chance to stop him, Nate lashed out at his father. His face contorted with anger and fright as his arms flailed wildly, striking Colby on the cheek.

“Why you little…!”

Without a second thought, Brian wrapped his arms around Nate, picking him up from the chair, not caring about the kicks he received as the tantrum completely took over. All he knew was that he needed to prevent Nate from hurting himself. Beth had explained that Nate had such a high tolerance for pain that he could severely injure himself and they could be none the wiser, which was why whenever he had a tantrum, she held him to calm him down and to be the one who took the pain.

“Get him out,” Brian suggested to Beth, his expression telling her that if she didn’t, then he would, and it may not be pretty.

“I’m not going anywhere asshole!”

“Colby, please,” Beth pleaded quietly.

Following him outside, Beth felt anger and hatred building up inside of her once more.

“See what you did!” she yelled, not caring what the neighbours may think. “That is why we don’t spring surprises on him if we can help it, especially ones like this,” she continued, pointing back towards the apartment.

“You can’t keep doing this Colby, you can’t just decide to hop on a plane, show up, cause mayhem and then disappear to leave everyone else to deal with the aftermath.”

“I won’t be disappearing so quick this time, I’ve been given two weeks leave so I can spend as much time with my son as possible, get to know him better,” Colby informed her smugly.

Beth ran a shaky hand through her dark brown hair. She was caught at a crossroads with that little revelation. She wasn’t under the illusion that Colby was doing this because he wanted to start building bridges between himself and Nate. It was driven by spite and anger towards her. She had walked out on him, and Beth knew it hadn’t sat well with him. Her friends in Laughlin had already filled her in on how he had gone around proclaiming that no one ever walked out on Colby Hudson and got away lightly. But for now, Beth needed to play dumb, to allow him to think that he had her right where he wanted her, even though she detested the way he was practically forcing her to use her son as a toy in his warped little game.

“You wanna see Nate, then that’s fine, but you have to fit in around us. He will need to know that you’re coming, and at what time. And if we’re busy doing something, then you’ll just have to wait.”

“Is that what time so Nate knows, or time enough for you to make sure your pretty boy in there has got plenty of warning to make sure he’s there to hold your hand?” Colby spat back.

“Brian’s a part of our lives now Colby, and you’ll just have to accept the fact that if he’s here when you visit, then that’s where he stays. I pushed him away once before because of you showing up, I’m not doing it again,” Beth answered honestly.

“How touching, but let’s get one thing fucking straight, he will never replace me in Nate’s life,” Colby told her, his tone almost menacing.

“No you’re right, he won’t, because let’s face it, there’s no one to really replace,” Beth stated clearly. “You can call me tomorrow to make arrangements for Tuesday,” she added, turning to go back inside.

“But I want to see him tomorrow,” Colby protested.

“And I’m telling you that’s not possible. You’ve upset him enough, let him have a day to get used to the fact that he’s going to have to see you again.”

Without another word, Beth continued on her way, leaning against the front door after she closed it to take a moment to calm herself. She walked through to the lounge, unable to help the smile that reached her lips once she saw Brian settled on the couch, Nate curled up in his lap. Brian looked over at her, and brought a finger to his lips to let her know to stay quiet.

“He asleep?” she mouthed.

Brian nodded, and sat forward carefully so he didn’t disturb Nate in any way. He followed Beth through to Nate’s room, placing him gently in his bed once Beth had pulled back the covers. He watched as she bent slightly, kissing Nate’s forehead, before turning back to him. Silently they walked into the hallway, leaving the door ajar a little way. Brian took Beth in his arms, holding her close.

“I didn’t expect him to calm down as quick as he did, and he just went out like a light,” he murmured.

“It doesn’t always go that way, sometimes it can take over an hour to get him calm, but he obviously trusts you, feels safe with you…and you did take control of it pretty quick,” Beth answered, her voice on the same level as his. “Thank you.”

Glancing down at her, Brian just shook his head.

“You need to stop thanking me for shit. You need to get it through that head of yours that we’re together now, and if this happens when I’m here, then I’m not just going to sit back and watch you deal with it, I’m gonna step in. You’ve been handling this on your own for far too long, let me take the punches and the kicks if I can, yeah?”

“Okay,” Beth whispered, biting back the urge to thank him again.

Sitting back on the couch, Beth on his lap, Brian caressed her back gently.

“So, is he heading back to Texas?” he questioned.

Beth sighed before going into detail over just what had taken place outside, not missing the way Brian tensed up when he heard the news.

“I’m on night crew again this week, but we’ll sort something out…I’d just like to be around, starting from tonight,” Brian admitted. “I know we said we’d wait a while before I stayed here when Nate was around, but….”

“”I’d like that,” Beth answered. “I’m not going to argue with you over that one.”

“I wasn’t giving you much choice in the matter anyway,” Brian chuckled, kissing the top of her head.

As they fell into a comfortable silence, Brian knew then that while everything seemed to moving at a pace quicker than either of them had anticipated, he was fine with that, and wouldn’t have it any other way. He wasn’t going to allow Colby’s appearance to be a deterent, if anything it was just going to spur him on to prove that this was right where he wanted to be, and nothing was going to change that.