I Didn't Know I Could Break Your Heart

"You're father was here?" Rodger asked dumbly, his chin hanging maybe five inches lower than normal. "How come nobody told me this?"

"Because... it didn't matter. It wasn't... a problem." Steven took a shaky breath and turned to stare at the wall. He didn't speak for a long time and for a while Marrietta and Rodger thought they had lost him to the drugs. When he spoke again, it was easy to tell that he was fighting back tears, "No one knew but me and Carlos... he didn't tell anyone because I begged him not to. He didn't tell anyone because I told him I'd talk to someone else... that I'd find help... that..." Steven swore, "It doesn't matter anymore. It's too late. Whatever."

Rodger was frozen in place by his half-brother's words, but Marrietta found the strength to walk closer to him. She wrapped one arm around his shoulder and pulled him closer to her. He let his head fall onto her shoulder, his breath coming in gasp, and closed his eyes. Rodger couldn't move. He was torn between being outrageously mad at Steven for being on drugs and just wanting to comfort his little brother. So he settled for a place that was somewhat in-between.

"How the f*ck did Carlos not realize that you were on drugs? How did he not know you weren't going to counseling, that you weren't getting help?" Rodger exclaimed, needing to direct his anger at someone.

Steven just shook his head, "It's way more complicated than that... he was dealing with other things... when he asked I blew him off... I...I destroyed his entire world. I mean, damn it, the guy hates my f*cking guts yet for some screwed up reason he can't help but act like an older brother to me. And I don't need that. He calls me a bastard, he spits at my feet, he hits me if I do something really dumb, but then he tries to act like a real brother to me? You know what, f*ck him. F*ck this entire family. F*ck m-"

"Don't you dare," Rodger snapped in such a menacing voice that Steven shut his mouth immediately. His dark eyes fell to the floor, making him seem much more innocent than he actually was. Rodger knelt before him, his words coming out in the form of a hiss, "Carlos loves you, he just needs someone to blame for what happened. He could never blame mom, because she raised him. He could never blame your dad, because he's never been around. Carlos is the best big brother you could ask for. This is the best family you could ask for. So you better shut the f*ck up."

Steven nodded his head slowly. He shifted away from Marrietta, needing the space to say what he was going to say next, and let it rip, "Carlos is gay. And I told the entire world because he wouldn't get off my back about going to the damned guidance councilor. He beat the shit out of me after that and we haven't spoken a civil word to each other sense. So never mind, you're such an outsider now but your still better to this family than I am. Do you not get that?"

Rodger shook his head, "They all love you, no matter what you did. Now, come downstairs and we'll get some real food into your system. Marrietta, what can you cook with bread and random condiments?"

"Nothing," She squeaked out nervously, "But I could go down to the store and get something that I could cook with."

He smiled at her reassuringly and then took her hand. Turning to his brother, he said, "We don't have all day. You'll be throwing up in a couple of hours at most with all that you've drunk."

"Carlos will kill me if he sees my face," Steven replied, completely serious, "He blames me for everything. Not just his fall from grace, but mom's death, dad's... for lack of a better word, depression and everything else shitty that's happened here over the last couple of months. He hates my f*cking guts."

"We'll protect you," Marrietta managed softly.

Steven smiled a little and then got up off of the ground. He gestured for the other two to go ahead before he followed them out.

When they reached the living room, the bundle of blankets on the couch started to move again. A mop of hair appeared and then, from behind it, a reddened face. There was no indication that Carlos had seen Steven, nor that he was mad at him. It happened in the blink of an eye.

Carlos had bolted from the couch and jumped on Steven before anyone could stop him. Both of them were screaming obscenities at each other, but Steven's came out muffled and it wasn't long before blood was pouring down his face.

As the shock of the moment died down, Rodger yelled, "Get off of him!"

"And why the f*ck would I do that?" Carlos shouted back.

"Because I'm here."

The entire room froze. Slowly, one by one, everyone's heads turned to face the man standing just inside the doorway. His dark brown hair was softly greying and his tired eyes sparkled as if to show that there used to be life in them. He wore a battered old leather jacket, faded jeans, a plaid button down shirt and big brown boots. He looked a lot less menacing than one would have thought.

The moment passed and Carlos leaped off of Steven. Steven staggered to his feet and , supporting himself against the wall, was already taking the pack of ice that Rodger had gotten. Marrietta stood in the background, trying to look innocent even though she knew that she was. The man smiled when his eyes fixed upon her.

"Marrietta, how nice to see you again," He stepped forward, dropping the six-pack of beer he was carrying into a nearby chair, and took her hands. "I can't believe you and Rodger are engaged... it seemed like just yesterday he was graduating from kindergarten." The man forced himself to laugh, but the sound was empty, "Have you two set a wedding date yet?"

"No." They replied in perfect unison. Rodger smiled then and continued, "Dad, it's only been a month and it's the middle of winter for crying out loud. There's no reason to be starting all of this stuff until spring, when the flowers are blooming again."

His dad scoffed, "The boy just wants his freedom for a while more. Don't let him out of your sight to often, he's probably got ten or twelve other girls in his closet." He smiled at his own joke, but once again the gesture was humourless. "And as for you two... what in god's name were you just doing?"

"Dad, I have every right to beat that scum bag's face into the ground if he decides he has the right to be anywhere near me," Carlos hissed. Standing, he was taller than most people would have expected and more muscular too. "After what he did to me, that bastard-"

"Don't call him that!" Three voices screamed at once. Carlos just shrugged it off.

"I hope I not only broke your nose this time, but gave you a pretty bad concussion too. Maybe you'll forget where you live one day and just not come home. It'd certainly be an improvement," He said, glaring daggers at Steven.

Steven merely shrugged, "Why don't you just move out of the house already then, douche bag? We all know the only reason you hung around was because of mom. Well, she's gone, so scram. Just go ahead and get the f*ck out of town you little fa-"

This time the three voices cut him off before he could even finish the word. And none of them were in sync, or even saying the same words. They all just knew that they couldn't let those words leave Steven's lips.

"Why don't you all just calm down? You're brothers, every one of you," Their father snapped in his most authoritative voice, "This isn't what your mother would have wanted. We've never been a perfect family and a lot of us have been sent away more than once. So here's what I'm going to say, on behalf of Allison, all you have to stop. Steven and Carlos, I forbid you to fight. Steven, you're not allowed to drink anymore, or smoke, or do drugs. Carlos, you have to stop hiding from the world. And Rodger-" He turned, but his middle child had left the room. "Where did Rodger go?"

"He left the room when you mentioned mom's name," Carlos mumbled.

Marrietta turned at once and headed down the hallway. She didn't even have time to stop and realized that she had no clue where she was going. She just kept going until she heard the telltale sound of sobs racking a body. Knocking lightly on the door, she poked her head in and whispered, "Hey."