I Didn't Know I Could Break Your Heart

Soft lips moved against his own. Smooth, chestnut hair tickled his cheeks as her hands moved to the buttons on his shirt. He pulled her close to him with every second but the image in his mind was a very different one.

He saw a handful of red hair in his hands, glimmering in the firelight. The hands on his chest had perfectly manicured nails in his mind, not chipped and chewed ones from the result of an outdoor lifestyle. If he opened his eyes, he was sure he would see her brown eyes, not the clear green ones that were in front of him.

His lips moved down her neck slowly to the perfect spot. He worked at it for a while and then realized that there was no moan. No moan... The real situation came flooding back to him in half a second, no more, no less.

Tyler dropped his hands from her hair and his lips stopped moving across her neck. He paused there for a moment. He could feel the frown that was forming on her face and the disappointment that was sparkling in her perfect green eyes. He let his hand fall against his side, his fingers brushing hers. Unlike most days, she did not rush to grab it and pull him closer.

With hard, calloused hands she tilted his chin up so that he looked her in the eyes. No playful smile sat on her lips and no sorrow shined in her eyes. She knew exactly what he was about to say to her. It happened the same way every single time and the only reason she put up with it was because he actually told her.

I cheated on you, Jennifer. The words echoed through her head. His lips seemed to be opening in slow motion. She refused to cry. This happened too many times for her to get upset when he admitted it. I'm really sorry. I don't know what's wrong with me. I love you, you know I do. Please forgive me.

"Jen?" Tyler began softly, working hard to avoid her eyes. She nodded her head almost imperceptibly. While she was biting on her lip, he asked, "Did I ever tell you why I'm like this?"

"Like what?" Jennifer asked, completely caught off guard.

"Have I ever told you why I cheat? Why I always tell you?" He replied. A silly little smile had edged its way onto his lips. He looked partially insane. "Did I ever tell you why I'm such a dick?"

She blinked. Her morals told her that she was supposed to tell him that he was not a dick and that he did not have to tell her anything. But, instead, she shrugged and responded, "No, you've never told me why you cheat."

"It's because of this girl. This really stupid girl who I should hate with my entire being, but that I don't hate at all... I love her, Jen. I love you too... but, she meant everything to me in high school. She was the only thing I knew that was completely real. She was... the one that got away."

Tyler took a deep breath and dove into the entire story, "When we were fifteen years old, I asked her out. We had this instant connection that was so perfect and so amazing that everyone we met supported our relationship. Even her crazy dad who hated all of her boyfriends loved us together.

"We stayed together without any break-ups until senior year. The dumbest, most idiotic thing happened. I was playing football and she was a cheerleader and it was the championship game. If we won it, I was a lock for the NFL.

"But some random bitch comes up to me at half time, to this day I have no idea who the hell she was, and she kisses me. And it's not some normal peck-on-the-cheek kiss,m it was intense and passionate like she was in love with me or something. And then she told me that we needed to talk and that it was about the other night.

"I had no idea what she was saying, it made no sense to me. I could have sworn that I had never seen her face before that day, but Marrietta heard the entire thing. She was pissed. She was too pissed to even yell at me or scream at me or anything. And I didn't know what to tell her. Was she supposed to believe me that some random girl had just come up to me and done that? I don't know... but she didn't let me explain. She dumped me right in the middle of the football field and... I haven't been able to stop thinking about her since."

Jennifer stared at him blankly for a moment. Her mouth was hanging open in a gaping hole. There was something about the timing of this story that bugged her. Something did not feel right here. Gathering her senses, she managed to stammer out, "And this girl... Marrietta... are you... is she...?"

"I saw her today," Tyler mumbled, dropping his head into his hands. "I couldn't help it, I needed to talk to her once she recognized me. But... she's engaged and I'm in love with you, I really am, Jen. I sound like such a dick for saying that after what I just told you, but I love you. Please believe me. I still want to be with you."

She blinked. "I... I don't know what to say to that, Tyler. It's just, I..." She paused, staring at him hard, "I've put up with a lot for you and... and I'm been threw so much shit with you and for you that... that I don't know if I can take there being another girl. A real other girl. One that you love. How... how am I supposed to compete with that kind of history, Tyler? It's just... it's so f*cking hard."

"I'm not asking you to compete with anybody," Tyler whispered, shaking his head. He grabbed Jennifer's arms and pulled her closer to him. There was a desperate look in his eye. "I'm asking you to help me forget her. Forever. I want to be with you... I want to... I want to marry you."