Never Again

A half hour after we had fallen asleep, I heard Frank’s phone ringing from beside my bed.

I heard him groan, before he reached for it on the bedside table. Although he had said that he hadn’t been very tired when he went to sleep, he hated being woken up when he had already gotten comfortable.

“Hello?” He spoke groggily into his phone, as I yawned and sat up.

I was feeling a little better after my nap; but the chocolate that I had for breakfast hadn’t kept me from being hungry. I was going to leave Frank to his phone call, and get something to eat, when suddenly he jumped up.

“But-” he gasped into the phone, looking past me with a pale face.

“What’s wrong?” I asked, knowing instantly that something was up.

He just put his hand on my shoulder, nodding silently at the phone as he listened to whoever was on the line.

After a few minutes he bit his lip, breaking the silence.

“We’ll be right there.” he turned off the phone, closing his eyes and taking a moment to catch his breath. “Amber…” He began softly.

“What? What’s wrong?” I was starting to get really worried, now.

“There’s been an accident…” Frank whispered, staring into space.

“Who?” I could feel all of the blood rush from my face as I froze, whispering the question.

“The guys… they-” Frank broke off mid-sentence, shaking his head and rubbing his eyes as if to stop tears.

“Are they okay? Where are they?” I spoke hurriedly, but the words seemed to come out of my mouth in slow motion. I took a deep breath, trying my hardest not to panic as my head started to whirl with what had happened - and what might happen.

“I don’t know, exactly. That was Ray, he’s okay - or so he tells me. He says Bob’s not hurt too bad, but he doesn’t know about Gee and Mikey.” Frank sighed, suddenly sitting down on the bed as if his legs wouldn’t support him. “They’re all in the hospital, and I said we’d be right there… You’d better get dressed.” He whispered finally.

I nodded silently, walking towards my closet, but not wanting to leave him alone. I watched him until he took a breath and stood up, burying his emotions for the time being, as he prepared himself for what was to come.

I took only a minute to get dressed, throwing on whatever I found and my favourite jacket. Tears came to my eyes as I saw the MCR symbol on the arm, but I blinked them away, forcing myself to think that everything was going to be fine; it would be okay.

Taking a deep breath, I hurried into the hallway, meeting Frank at the door.

“Well, let’s go. I’m sure they’ll all be fine.” I lied, partly to myself.

Frank nodded, but his eyes were still terrified as we got into the car.

Ten minutes of Frank’s fastest driving later, we climbed out of the car, and ran through the hospital car park.

Standing helplessly in the queue of people in the waiting room, Frank kept looking around like a deer caught in headlights, whenever anyone shifted or made a sound. I couldn’t think of anything to say that could make either of us feel better, so I just held his hand and smiled weakly each time the line of people inched forwards.

After another ten minutes of just waiting, the registrar finally called ‘next!’ and there was no one in front of us. Frank stepped up to the counter anxiously.

“Hi, we’re here to see Toro, Bryar and the Ways? Just came in hour or so ago?”

The woman nodded tersely, clicking slowly through her files on the computer.

“You can’t see either of the Ways yet, the doctors are seeing to them.”

I saw Frank’s face turn a paler shade of white when she mentioned doctors, and he gripped my hand tightly.

“But... let’s see, Toro and Bryar are in Room 68, third floor.” She smirked at us, obviously reciting protocol. “Don’t disturb the patients.”

Frank nodded silently, frowning slightly as we hurried through the maze of corridors to the room. He paused as we passed room 64, counting the doors until we came to the right one.

“Well, here we are.” He muttered flatly, a thin disguise over his true anxiety.

I took a deep breath, shaking my head to come back to reality after all the running around, then glanced at Frank, nodding. He reached for the door, knocking quietly as he opened it.

“Hello?”

“Hey, Frank, Amber!” A tired but pleased voice rang out, which I recognized as Ray’s.

By now we had both entered the room, where I could see Bob and Ray sitting up on hospital beds. Bob smiled and waved as we moved further into the room. I smiled back, frowning a little as I saw the cast on his arm.

“Hey, guys.” I waved to them both, watching Frank as he moved quickly to the beds.

“How are you doin’?” He spoke quietly, sitting on one of the tables between the beds.

“Ah, we’re okay.” Ray nodded, shrugging “Just a couple of sprains and cuts. It’s the other two I’m worried about. Mikey was awake when we got here, but his leg’s hurt pretty bad. Gerard… well, I don’t know.” He put his hands up in the air. “Since it happened he hasn’t woken up at all, and his head was beat up real bad. I think they’re in surgery now.”

I nodded sadly, moving to stand next to Frank. So far, neither of us had given into our emotions and cried; but we were both close. I think we were both in shock.

Then we heard a cough from the bed on the other side, and Bob spoke.

“I think they’ll be alright, though. They’re tough.”

I smiled weakly, knowing that if anyone knew what was going to happen, he would. Ray nodded, fiddling absentmindedly with a bandage on his arm.

“But, guys?” Bob looked up again, frowning. “I know it’s not really what we wanna talk about, but, what about the tour? I reckon - I know - that they’re both gonna pull through, but none of us will be able to play for weeks at least - probably a lot longer for...”

Just then, the door opened, and Alicia rushed in; gray-faced and breathing heavily.

“What happened? What’s going on?” She cried, her eyes wide.

Frank blinked, and the other two just sat there; not knowing how to explain it.

“Ash…” I tried to speak calmly, but my voice shook a little.

“What?” Alicia sank down on the edge of Bob’s bed, looking around but obviously not seeing who she was looking for. “Where’s Mikey?”

“He’s with the doctors - he’s gonna be alright, I think.” I put my hand on her shoulder, knowing that my reassurances were not helping as much as I would have liked.

“What happened?” Alicia found her voice, breathing quickly and shallowly.

“We hadn’t got that far, yet.” I glance over at Ray and Bob, hoping one of them could tell us.

Frank was looking around as well, starting to think more rationally after the shock had worn off a little.

“Yeah, what happened? Was Gerard-” He broke off as Bob shook his head.

“It wasn’t anyone’s fault, it was an accident.” He looked around at us, as Ray finished his explanation.

“It was the sun - y’know how it gets real bright driving uptown at sunset?” Ray bit his lip, closing his eyes as he remembered what had only happened a few short hours ago. “It was so bright, he couldn’t see anything, and the truck… at the intersection, he just drove right through…” His voice trailed off.

Frank was holding his face in his hands, trying to take deep breaths as he comprehended what had happened.

Alicia looked just as shocked, and was still silent when Frank found his voice minutes later.

“I need to go find out what’s going on. I’ll be back soon.” he looked around at me, so I nodded silently, squeezing his hand as he left the room.

I knew that he couldn’t handle all the confusion; not when his friends were hurt.

After a moment of silence Alicia looked up at me, with tears in her eyes.

“You okay?”

“I think so.” I took a deep breath, calming myself. “You?”

“Yeah,” She nodded, biting her lip. “I’ll be okay. At least now I know Mikey should be alright... that bitch at reception who rang me and told me to get in here wouldn’t tell me anything!”

I smiled slightly, knowing that she was just getting her frustrations and worries out.

We sat in silence for another few minutes, before I sighed.

“So... now we wait.”

“Yep... we just wait.” Ray sighed and nodded subduedly from beside me.

Bob looked up sharply from my other side, beyond Alicia.

“They’re gonna be okay, you know that, don’t you?”

“Well...” Ray started, but trailed off.

I knew what he was thinking - he had been one of the few people who had seen what had really happened. He knew how badly Gerard was injured; and that Mikey wasn’t in great shape, either.

“The fact is we don’t know for sure, Bob. We can say we hope so, but... I don’t know.” I finished Ray’s earlier statement tentatively, all the while thinking to myself that Bob must still be in shock.

He couldn’t be thinking straight - after all, no one knew, did they?

I didn’t have any longer to contemplate my thought, for the door to the hospital room suddenly flew open.

“Guys, guys!” Frank cried, dashing into the sickbay. “They’re gonna be okay!”

“What?” Caught off guard, it took me a while for his message to sink in.

“They’re gonna be okay!” He repeated his statement, grinning widely.

“That’s great!” Ray sat on the edge of his bed, leaning forwards. “Have they woken up yet? Can we see them?”

“Well, Mikey is awake, but Gerard isn’t, not yet...” Frank’s smile fell a little, but he was still cheerful as he came over to me, giving me a thankful hug, just for the sake of it. “But, they say he will be...” He frowned for a second as a thought occurred to him.
“Hey, guys?”

“Yeah?”

“Has anyone got onto Bandit’s babysitter? She should really know what’s going on, and we have to work out what to do with Bandit until... well, until Gee’s back on his feet again.”

That was when the enormity of the situation really hit me. While none of us knew what was going on, we were running on adrenaline; and although we were terrified we only had to worry about the moment - right then and there.

But now we had the future to look to.

Mikey, at least, would be out of action for six or eight weeks; but who knew how long the doctors would want to keep Gerard for observation? If a broken leg would take weeks to mend, what about severe concussion, and maybe more broken bones? What was going to happen now that...?

I snapped myself out of my contemplations, forcing myself to just concentrate on one thing at a time. Right now, the most important thing we had to organize was Bandit.

“I’ll ring her.” I grabbed my cellphone out of my pocket and walked over to the corner, telling myself to calm down. After all, everyone was going to be fine.

I dialed the home number for Gerard’s house, relaxing a little as I imagined him back at home with his daughter...

“...hello?”

I jumped as somebody picked up the phone.

“Oh, hi... is this Bandit’s babysitter? Jaynie?”

“Yes, it is.”

“It’s Amber here, Amber Freeman, do you remember? I need to talk to you, about Gerard... privately.”

“Um, okay...”

“Well, there’s been an accident...”

I related everything I knew about the crash, and Gerard’s current condition. By the time I had finished, the line had gone silent.

“Hello?” I frowned, hoping we hadn’t been cut off.

“Uh, I’m still here - are you serious? Oh my god... but, what do you want me to do? I can’t explain it to Bandit...”

“No, no.” I explained hurriedly, “I just wanted you to know what’s happened, and then could you tell Bandit that she’s going to be staying at Auntie Amber’s tonight, please? I’ll explain some of it to her then.”

“Okay, okay...”

“I’ll send Frank over to pick her up in an hour or so... and if she could pack for a few days it would be good.”

“I’ll do that... and good luck to you all. Mr. Way’s a good man.”

Thank you.” I smiled sadly, “He is.”

“Okay, bye.”

“Bye.”

I hung up the phone, glad to know that there were people behind us, wishing Gerard well.

“What did she say?” Frank came up behind me, putting his hand on my side.

“Well,” I sighed, “She knows as much as we do, now, and she’s alright for you to go pick Bandit up in a while.”

“Is there anyone else we need to call?” I looked over at Alicia, Ray and Bob, trying to make sure I forgot no one in the confusion.

“Uh, I don’t think so...” Ray frowned in thought. “I rang Gee and Mikeys’ parents, and our manager just after I rang you guys and Alicia - Donna and Donald should be here any minute, and the boss says he’s just gonna organize what he can and see how it goes.”

“Okay...” I paused for a moment, looking around at the sparse interior of the room, and between the other four people in it. “So what do we do now?”

There was silence in the room.

I had an overwhelming urge to organize something - to work out the frustration and helplessness that dragged me down when I couldn’t do anything.

“Isn’t there anything we can do? Just waiting?” I had tears in my eyes, now.

Frank came over to me, wrapping his arms around my shoulders as I pressed my face into his chest.

“I just...” I started to sob, but caught myself.

“I know, I know...” Frank kissed the top of my head as he spoke. “They’ll be okay. We’ve just gotta wait.”

I took a deep breath as he held me, eventually pulling away and wiping my eyes.

“I’m sorry...” I slumped down on the chair by the bed, feeling stupid for crying when everyone else was holding up.

It’s okay.” Alicia spoke quietly, reaching over and taking my hand. “We’re all worried, and you’re sick, too. It won’t be long before we can go in and see them, I think. You’ll be alright then.”

I smiled at her, thankful for her reassurances.

A moment passed, before Frank spoke.

“I guess I should go pick Bandit up. You were gonna take her straight home, weren’t you?”

“Yeah,” I nodded. “I guess I should go with you, so I can look after her when you get there.”

“Okay... but, what are we going to tell her? I don’t really want to tell her everything...”

“You’re right... we don’t want to scare her if... I mean, now they’re gonna be okay.” I glanced around at Ray, Bob and Alicia. “I guess we could just say that Gerard and Mikey ‘had an accident’. That way we’re not lying, but she doesn’t have to know about the truck.”

They nodded in unison, Frank smiling at me weakly as I grabbed my bag, waving to the others.

“Ring as soon as anything happens - anything at all, okay?” I told Alicia, who was the only one with a cellphone on her.

“I will. Oh, and good luck with Bandit - hopefully you won’t need it, but all the same.” She smiled a little as she answered me, looking more hopeful and less despondent.

“Okay. Bye!”

We left the hospital, feeling sad, but not miserable; there was hope, after all.