Just to Live

Tabitha took only the money she kept in her room in case she needed it. The only evidence she left behind assuring she was indefinitely gone was a note she wrote for her mom and sister, saying only sorry. Maybe what she was doing was extremely immature and completely irrational, but the only thing she focused on was anger and deceit.

Matthew was probably waiting at the stairs with a smug look on his face. Tabitha didn’t want to deal with his arrogance and physically hurt him. Instead, she entered the second floor and jogged down the end of the hall to the sliding door with the elevated patio. It was more than lucky that there was a set of steps that touched the grass. Now she wouldn’t have had to make a 20-foot dive. When she reached the gates, she climbed over it as fast as she could.

Three hours later, she was well out of Huntington. It was now dark outside except for the dim streetlights and headlights from cars zooming by. It was like old times; roaming the streets at night without a mission.

Tabitha didn’t know what to do. She would only admit to herself that what she did was the worst choice of her life. She shouldn’t have shouted that she quit and left. But that was the only thing she could do given the situation.

Her friendship with Matthew was slowly blossoming until he had to reveal he was the person who swept her off her feet. She would’ve been okay if it wasn’t Matthew. Like she screamed before at him, he was nearing the middle of his life and she had yet to begin hers.

Their friendship was like having independence. The very first dose was the most exciting and thrilling. After more doses, the rejuvenating feeling eased down to a level of comfort. Of course, Tabitha and Matthew’s friendship only touched the very tip of trust. All it took was one conversation to eradicate it.

Trust wasn’t the thing that bothered her the most. The fact that the man she daydreamed about for months was her boss was the point of no return. She already didn’t believe in “love” for another person except for family or friends. How could love be real if she witnessed her mother lunge into a deep depression after the disappearance of her father? No, there was no such thing as love.

Tabitha’s night didn’t get any better. A man passed by her on the sidewalk, looked back at her, and hooted. She cringed and kept walking, ignoring the probably drunk man.

“Not even a hi?” he shouted when he noticed she didn’t respond.

Tabitha continued walking and didn’t look back. If she didn’t show fear, he wouldn’t bother her. Men like him only went after the weak ones. Her philosophy held no use as the man pulled her hair and began yelling at her. “When I say hello to you, you answer!”

Before she could swallow it, she cried and tried to get free, feeling the roots of her hair loosening. All the bad things had to decide to conquer her by occurring in one night.

“‘Ey, let her go!”

The possible rapist released his grip on her hair, only to hold his left eye. He glared at the man who decided to help the girl. Knowing he would be outnumbered, he ran away as fast as a cheetah.

Too shaken that she couldn’t cry or thank the man who possibly saved her life, Tabitha was silent. His eyes surged in distress, trying to clear his thoughts so he could decide what to do next. His ultimate decision was to take Tabitha to the hospital in case she was externally…or internally hurt.

The man sat outside in the waiting room as stoic as anyone could be until the doctor motioned for the man to follow him. Outside of Tabitha’s room, he explained she was only spooked and that she would be fine unless she needed psychological help. She was free to leave whenever she pleased.

Finishing his diagnosis, the doctor headed back towards the waiting room. The man walked into Tabitha’s room where she sat on the white hospital bed with her hands folded in front of her. He sighed, feeling a sudden shock of sadness.

“You look like my wife. Her name’s Maria Escobar. I love that woman so much…” he said unexpectedly. He didn’t know why he told a stranger about a section of his life.

Something about the way the man mentioned his wife made Tabitha forget about her traumatizing experience of the night. He said her mother’s name. Realization made her open her mouth in shock. “Excuse me, but I think you’re my bastard father.”

He almost developed whiplash by the speed of his reaction to her comment. “You’re not Tabitha…are you?”

“Yes, I am.” She scoffed, looking atrociously disgusted at her father. “I can’t believe you left!”

“Please calm down.” He stood by her bed, hands raised. “I left because I was scared. I’m still alone you know. I don’t have a girlfriend or anything of the type. I’ve been meaning to return to Huntington, but I thought you all moved. How have you been?”

“We were homeless for three years,” she spat with malevolence.

The tie around his neck tightened as the guilt bubbled in his throat. “Oh,” he uttered, lifeless. “Look, I can’t change the past, but would you like to stay with me until you can get back on your feet? I know you’re 18 so you’ll probably end up somewhere far away from here.”

What shocked Tabitha the most was her eagerness as she said, “Okay.”