Wham Bam Thank You Ma'am

Ferin awoke to someone banging what sounded like a drum out in the hallway. She pushed down on the pillow to see Dunn's alarm clock. It read 6:30am.

"Oh my god are you serious?" she groaned as she buried her head back into the pillow. At least they had made it through the night without any difficulties.

"People in this house are crazy," Dunn mumbled beside her.

Ferin laughed, "hey you are just as bad as them sometimes."

Dunn smiled and rolled over to face her so he could see the clock. "Well at least I know the importance of sleep."

Ferin nodded. Dunn was never a morning person.

The banging had quieted down a little so Ferin swung her legs over the edge of the bed and padded barefoot to the door in boxers and a T-shirt. She opened it carefully and checked to make sure she wasn't going to step in anything before creeping out into the hall, closing the door behind her, letting Dunn go back to sleep.

Ape was peeking out from behind her bedroom door. "What's goin on?" she whispered.

"It's okay Ape, I'll go check," Ferin assured her as she wandered down the stairs into the dining room, past the pool table, and into the living room. She noticed Bam's door was open which meant that he and Ville were also up. She shut the TV off then headed down to the pirate bar.

"Good morning," Ville said cheerfully from his perch on a stool.

She frowned, Ville, Bam, Jess and DiCo were sitting around the table.

"It's about time you got up," Bam smiled.

She glared at him then at Jess whom seemed to be in the possession of a drum and a pair of drum sticks. "We should have left you at the airport," she grumbled.

Jess laughed, "and here I thought you were the sweet type."

"I am."

"We've been up for a long time. We've even been to the airport and back. We figured it was about time everyone else gets up," DiCo smiled.

Ferin grabbed a glass then wandered to the fridge for a glass of apple juice which Ape had so sweetly bought for her the day before.

"Why were you at the airport?" she asked as she ran her fingers through her hair and sat down on one of the heartagram stools.

"The boys went home this morning," Ville answered her.

Ferin thought back. It hadn't even dawned on her that Mige and the rest of the HIM boys were gone from their claim on the living room.

"How come they didn't stay until tomorrow?"

Ville smiled softly. "They wanted to spend a little extra time with their families before we go back to work."

"How come Ape and Phil aren't up yet?" Bam wondered out loud.

DiCo nodded, "yeah usually Ape would be up throwing a shit fit."

"They are up," Ferin said as she took a sip of her juice. "I told Ape I'd see what was going on."

"Well that is unacceptable," DiCo said in his pirate voice. "We are hungry."

He grabbed Jess by the arm. "Come Jess and bring your drum, we must wake them."

"No, no," Ferin protested as she waved her hand in the air.

Everyone stopped to look at her.

She sighed, "I'll make breakfast."

"You can cook?" DiCo asked.

"Well I've been successfully nourishing myself for like five years now, so yes I can cook."

Bam did the math in his head. "You moved out when you were sixteen?"

Ferin nodded and wandered to the fridge for the bacon and eggs, and the freezer for hash browns.

"You would have still been in high school," Jess added.

Ferin set the food down on the counter by the stove and found the frying pans with Bam's help.

"Yes, I thought I was teaching my parents a lesson for being so controlling by moving in with my boyfriend."

Bams eyebrows shot up in curiosity. "You still with him?"

Ferin shook her head.

"Didn't work out?" Ville stated rather than asked.

"You could say that," she replied after a minute as she cut open the package of bacon.

"Please tell me you are making french toast too," Tash said from the bottom of the stairs.

"I can if you get me a bowl, bread, cinnamon and a fork," Ferin replied, thankful for the interruption.

Just as she was finishing up, Dunn, Raab, Rake and Johnny appeared.

"Oh god that smells good," Dunn said as he grabbed a plate.

Ferin smiled and headed back to the fridge for more eggs and bacon. After she cooked it up and successfully got everyone else fed, she fixed up two plates and summoned Tash's help to give Phil and Ape breakfast in bed.

***

Dunn glanced at his watch, "It's eight in the morning, you think Vito is up yet?"

"No, but we have to be there before he gets up anyway or else he will eat breakfast," Rake said.

"What are you doing to Vito?" Phil asked as he and Ape came down the stairs, empty plates in hand.

"Remember how we did don't feed Phil day? Well now it's Vito's turn," Bam grinned.

"Oh this I like," Ape smiled.

"Bam you know Vito is gonna freak out. He's getting sick of your games," Phil warned him as he took a couple more pieces of French toast and bacon.

"Yeah Phil that's why were taking him to three mile island with us."

"Three mile island?" Johnny repeated.

"Oh no," Ape murmured at the memories of the last outing to three mile island.

"Don't worry Ape, you and Phil are safe this time," Raab added.

"What do you mean this time?" Bam yelped. "In case you forgot, which I don't know how
you could have, they left us on three mile island. They..." he pointed to Ape and
Phil. "Were fine."

"Until you showed me the house blowing up!" Ape yelled back.

Bam grinned, "I know that made it totally worth it."

"So how exactly do you plan on getting Vito out to three mile island?" Tash interrupted before finishing her orange juice.

"We'll tell him that we're going out there to have a fire and hot dog roast."

"So are we staying there?" Ville asked.

Bam nodded.

A little concerned Johnny asked, "Are we going to get to eat?"

Bam thought about this for a moment. "What if we have someone deliver us food at certain times and some can eat while the others keep Vito occupied, then we'll switch?"

Everyone nodded in agreement.

"Do we have to go?" Ape asked cautiously, referring to her and Phil.

Bam thought about this too. He wouldn't have to worry about Ape, but Phil may try to help Don Vito out.

"No you guys can stay here this time, no actually you two can bring us the food."

Ape nodded in agreement, at least her and Phil wouldn't have to sleep out in the woods.

"How are we going to keep Vito on the island?" Dunn asked.

"We'll get the boat to leave as soon as it drops us off, and we'll get it to come back for us in the morning."

"And sleeping arrangements?" Tash asked.

"We'll worry about that when we get there," Bam said.

"Isn't it a little late to worry once we're already there?" Ferin asked as she began loading the dishwasher.

"Fine, I'll bring Glomb. That way you ladies won't have to sleep on the ground and get dirty."

Ferin stood up straight and stared at him, "As I recall from a Viva La Bam episode, you boys didn't like being stranded out there with nothing either. In fact someone was complaining about being sick the next morning."

"You girls wouldn't have liked it either," Raab defended Bam.

"That's precisely why I wanted to know if we were bringing anything," Tash added.

Bam threw his hands up in the air, "alright we'll get tents, blankets, everything we need to make this a big ol' camping experience."

"You know what," Ferin slammed the door to the dishwasher shut. "Forget it, we're not taking a damn thing. And then we'll see who's whining about it in the morning."

Bam looked at her kind of stunned. He was impressed. She wasn't putting up with any of his shit. Hell, she was trying to one up him.

"Oooh do I smell a bet coming on," DiCo said as he slipped in between them.

"No," Bam shook his head.

Ferin raised her eyebrows, "I bet by the time night rolls around, one of you guys is complaining."

Bam laughed, "I don't think so."

"That includes Vito," Ferin added.

Ape laughed, "you know you've lost Bam"

Bam shook his head, "we'll bribe him to keep him from complaining."

"Beer should work Bam," Ville smiled.

"Can't give it to him there," Tash said.

"No, but we can give it to him after his 24 hours is up," Dunn added.

Bam leaned against the island, "So what happens when one of you ladies complains?"

"It won't happen. But when one of you guys complains, you all become Tash, April, Phil, and I's servants for a day."

Raab laughed, "Why do we have to wait on Phil?"

"Because it's about time you did something nice for your parents Bam."

"I have done nice stuff for them," Bam said in defense.

"Sooo," Jess interrupted everyone. "While we're sitting here fighting, Vito is probably up and about eating breakfast."

"Shit," Bam said as he grabbed the hummer keys off the key hook and tossed them to Ferin.

She caught them just before they hit the island. "What am I suppose to do with these?"

"You have to go pick him up. He'll go with you. While you're gone I'll call Glomb and get us a boat."

"Oh god," Ferin groaned and looked pleadingly at Tash.

"I'll come with you," she said as she got up and put her dishes into the dishwasher.

"I'll come to," Dunn offered. "In case you need back-up."

"Rad." Ferin muttered and headed upstairs to quickly get dressed.

She was sure picking up Vito was punishment for initiating their little bet. Oh well, once they won, Bam would be sorry.