Can't Find My Way Home
Chapitre sept
The pounding inside my head was not letting up, it was like having small children with squeaky toys and mallets having a bouncy castle party on my brain. I licked my dry lips, and furrowed my brow. Something wasn't right, I had an extra body part then what I recalled I got off the plane with, and it was draped over my stomach. I turned my head and my heart stopped, Frank was sleeping soundly with his arm around me. And just to make matters worse, he was naked. Gulping hard, I lifted the sheet to find that I was also as naked as the day I was born. "Oh fuck.." I muttered. What had I done? No, no.. It couldn't have been me, he obviously overpowered me and took advantage of me in my drunken state. Yeah, that was it. Only, it wasn't. I remembered exactly what had happened, it came flooding back into mind like a collogen injection to the lips. I managed to pull a sheet away from Frank, and wrap it around myself. I didn't move far, my head wouldn't let me stand for too long, so I moved just to the end of the bed. I sat there and thought, in silence for at least fifteen minutes before he woke up.
"Oh what?" he said confoundedly. I didn't turn to look at him, he'd get the idea soon. "Dill.. did we?" I nodded slowly, "Oh.. fuck." his reaction was much the same as my own.
"Let's just blame the mini bar concept." I turned to look at him and he smiled, he was my idea of perfection. Even with all his tiny flaws, to me he was still perfect. I couldn't be mad at what had happened, I could be ashamed in myself, I could be embarressed and upset, but I couldn't be mad.
"No, it's my fault, I came to your room, I-"
"Frank," I cut him off before he went in a downward spiral of blame, "we're both adults, we're not randy teenagers anymore, we obviously made a concious decision to do it, albeit a drunken concious decision, but we consented all the same. I'm not mad."
"You're not?" he said, apologetically. I sighed.
"No. In fact, I'm glad." he looked shocked, "Maybe now that we've got it out of our systems, we'll move on." I didn't even believe myself, there was no way I could move on. I've loved this guy near all my life.
"Yeah." he said in a tone I couldn't quite place, "Definitely. We can just.. move on." he nodded, he chewed on his lip ring like it was annoying him and tapped his fingers on the bed. "Oh shit, I'd better leave or the guys will start getting the wrong, well the right, but the wrong idea.." he jumped up and began pulling on his clothes. I couldn't help but look at his colourful body once more before he was dressed. I stood up and walked over to the door, the sheet clasped tightly around me. He followed me and stood infront of it, his hand waiting to turn the handle. "I.. I'll see you later?"
"Probably." I laughed slightly, I didn't want him to leave.
"Good." he nodded.
"Moving on now remember." I said standing away from the door so as he could open it further. Instead, he closed it.
"Moving on?" he mused, "Can we start doing that once I leave?"
"Okay." I agreed not really knowing where he was going with this.
"Okay." he gently placed his fingers on my chin, and one hand on the back of my head and kissed me. It wasn't your everyday kiss, and it certainly wasn't the run of the mill passionate kiss, it had feeling behind it, it was almost sad.
"Oh what?" he said confoundedly. I didn't turn to look at him, he'd get the idea soon. "Dill.. did we?" I nodded slowly, "Oh.. fuck." his reaction was much the same as my own.
"Let's just blame the mini bar concept." I turned to look at him and he smiled, he was my idea of perfection. Even with all his tiny flaws, to me he was still perfect. I couldn't be mad at what had happened, I could be ashamed in myself, I could be embarressed and upset, but I couldn't be mad.
"No, it's my fault, I came to your room, I-"
"Frank," I cut him off before he went in a downward spiral of blame, "we're both adults, we're not randy teenagers anymore, we obviously made a concious decision to do it, albeit a drunken concious decision, but we consented all the same. I'm not mad."
"You're not?" he said, apologetically. I sighed.
"No. In fact, I'm glad." he looked shocked, "Maybe now that we've got it out of our systems, we'll move on." I didn't even believe myself, there was no way I could move on. I've loved this guy near all my life.
"Yeah." he said in a tone I couldn't quite place, "Definitely. We can just.. move on." he nodded, he chewed on his lip ring like it was annoying him and tapped his fingers on the bed. "Oh shit, I'd better leave or the guys will start getting the wrong, well the right, but the wrong idea.." he jumped up and began pulling on his clothes. I couldn't help but look at his colourful body once more before he was dressed. I stood up and walked over to the door, the sheet clasped tightly around me. He followed me and stood infront of it, his hand waiting to turn the handle. "I.. I'll see you later?"
"Probably." I laughed slightly, I didn't want him to leave.
"Good." he nodded.
"Moving on now remember." I said standing away from the door so as he could open it further. Instead, he closed it.
"Moving on?" he mused, "Can we start doing that once I leave?"
"Okay." I agreed not really knowing where he was going with this.
"Okay." he gently placed his fingers on my chin, and one hand on the back of my head and kissed me. It wasn't your everyday kiss, and it certainly wasn't the run of the mill passionate kiss, it had feeling behind it, it was almost sad.