Status: in progress
you warm my cold heart ( sesshomaru love story)
you can have whatever you like
I put on my school uniform right after I took my long hot shower
As soon as I was done I walked down stairs to the kitchen where my sisters where. Each of them sat at the table eating cereal wearing the same uniform as I did. I grabbed the box of lucky charms and began fixing myself a bowel.
“Look who decided to come back.” Jamie commented.
I rolled my eyes “shuddap.” An threw some lucky charms at her. Tiffany glared at me from the other end of the table. When I sat down at my seat and grabbed the milk bottle to pour some into my bowel I looked at her from my cereal “what’s the matter with you?”
“YOU were supposed to talk to janku for me yesterday. “ I frown “shit…sorry tiff…I'm sorry…look ill do it for you today? I have art with him. By the end of the day the two of you will be dating” I gave her an on reassuring smile. She returned it back to me “thanks…sorry if I seem cranky about it…I just really like him…”
“Oh no you don’t… you like his MONEY. “ Tiffany gasped at Jamie. I dug my spoon in my cereal scooping some up and putting it in my mouth chewing it sheepishly. I knew for a fact an argument was about to start. I defiantly wasn’t going to get in between it. I'm in enough trouble as is.
Tiffany shot back at Jamie “SHUT up you doesn’t know anything. You’re so stupid sometimes!”
“Me? You’re the one chasing after someone who doesn’t want ANYTHING to do with you.”
Before this got out of hand even more, our step mother walked in.
“Ok, ok enough girls. Hurry up and finish your breakfast.” The two of them stopped but kept an intense glare among each other. This argument wasn’t over.
“Delray…I'm very disappointed in you honey...i thought you were better behaved then your sisters…but leaving the house without even notifying us is not acceptable.” She placed her hands on her hips.
“Mom...comes ON. KAGOME called to let you guys know….”
“You know better than to have SOMEONE else call for you. You could have been somewhere else so I and your father aren’t even sure she was telling the truth.”
She certainly was smart. “Ok...ok…I was wrong. But next time I go out I’ll let you and daddy know alright? “ I played the innocent role with the matching look a batted my pretty eyelashes at her. She smiled at me “ok. I’d like that. Now come on girls so I can drop you off.” My sisters stood up as well as I did, we each put our now empty bowels in the sink. We walked to the door to leave as soon as I opened it my father walked down stairs fumbling with his tie he looked a lot sober than he did last night
“Honey…remembers? I'm supposed to drive Delray to get her test present?”
Tiffany and Jamie smiled “we already went to go see ours. You have to go pick out yours” they smiled proudly. My step mom nodded happily “oh yeah…I forgot that you three scored the highest in your school.”
A cold feeling swept over me. I didn’t want to be alone with him… not now not ever.
“OH….cant it waits…? I mean I haven’t been in school for a day or two...so maybe I should go now a do this later on today?”
Mom shook her head “no can do. Your grounded an aren’t allowed to leave the house after school for awhile. And plus your father and I will be at work. So now is the time. Don’t worry I’ll tell the school you’ll be a bit late. Have fun. Nothing over 100,000” They walked out the house.
My dad placed a hand gently on my shoulder. It felt like acid on my skin… and I wanted it off. As soon as possible.
“Come on.we’ll have fun”
In the car...
It was quiet. Very quiet. I could feel my dad looking at me occasionally. But my eyes stayed on the window. Usually after drinking he could sometimes forget about what he’s done...sometimes he would remember and avoid me or act like I'm the worse child in the world. Anything was better than him being a raging drunk. But it didn’t take away my intimidation.
“So…” he cleared his throat loudly “how’s school going?”
He was trying to start a conversation. Hmm…I couldn’t tell if he remembered or not so I just played along like everything was perfect.
“Great…great…how’s work?”
“It’s good. I might be in for a promotion.”
I smiled at him. “That’s great daddy…” I could tell her was happy to see me smile at him.
We came to a stop light; he looked over at me “yeah...it is. Your mother always wanted us to do good you know…looks like her dream is coming true..” he waved his hand in a careless circular motion “you know…with my promotion and you girls getting great grades in school.”
I nod remembering my mother’s smiling face. “Yeah…you’re right…”
Daddy pushed the pedal and began driving again when the light turned green. When I looked at him I could see him smile slowly form into a sad one “I miss her. A lot…”
“I know daddy…we do to...”
“I think you and I are the only ones...your sisters are so…they just seem to of forgotten her.”
“What makes you say that?”
“I asked them if they are ready for this Saturday…they asked me what that was.”
I gasped. Feeling hurt. That was mom’s birthday. We went every year to her grave to put her favorite flowers on her grave.
I couldn’t believe they had forgotten.
“That’s…terrible.”
“You don’t know how angry I was…but I'm glad to see you still remember…”
A cold feeling rushed over me as I felt his hand go to my bare knee cap.
“Delly…you never disappoint me…I know I haven’t been the best dad in the world…with my...drinking...”
“You remember….”
He sighed sadly “yes. I'm sorry. It’s just…when I drink...it’s the only time I see your mom…I see her in you...not Ur sisters…just you. That’s why I love you so much. It’s like shes still here when I drink a when you’re near…”
“So…you see her now…” I said with fear. “No…I have to drink first... in order for me to her and you have to be around. Delly…I'm not proud of it…I know it hurts you...bnut you don’t understand how much it...”
“I lost mommy to…I do understand. But I'm not hurting anyone else in the family, I don’t see why you have to do it with me…you married hiraku did you not? She doesn’t satisfy you?”
“No…sometimes she doesn’t…I just feel better with you…I know you’re not your mother but...i don’t know delly...i just…I feel a lot better...when-“
“Dad I know you’re depressed I know your hurt...im willing to help you threw this...but I don’t want you to touch me like that... or hit me…cant things be how they use to be?”
“…I don’t know…..”
We ended the conversation at that.
The drive lasted for ten more minutes. We pulled up at a car lot. All of them looked very expensive.
We both got out of the car. My dad looked at me happily “pick ANY car you want. “
My mouth dropped open. I always wanted my own car...and here I was…about to get one. “Dad...this is cool! “ I ran to the red sports car. The giddy feeling inside of me faded when I saw the price tag “900, 00…………….damn…” my dad walked beside me, warpping his arm over my shoulder making me jump.
“You can have it…”
I looked up at his face “no...Mom said…” he shook his head “that was for your sisters… YOU get any car you want. No questions asked. It’s going to be our secret...” I didn’t feel too comfortable with this.
I told him no, but he brought it for me anyways. I was to come by to pick it up later on. He told me not to tell my step mum or my sisters of the price of the car...and that I would be OUR secret. I wish things would go back to normal.
He was now driving me to school. Which was great because I needed to get away from this man even if it was for a couple of hours.
I leaned my head on the window and closed my eyes. Feeling incredibly tired for some reason. Just when I was about to doze off to sleep land I felt some one rub my thigh. My eyes shot open “daddy…!”
I slapped his hand away from my thigh. “What the hell is wrong with you?”
“I know I'm not drunk...but that doesn’t mean I can’t love you right now does it?”
“YES it does. DON’T touch me at all daddies! I don’t like it when you do that I already cleared that up wi-!!” He back handed me roughly. I yelped out in pain cradling my bleeding lip. He’s never hit me that hard before in his life…
“Your so damn selfish…that’s all you are.” He growled under his breath. Instead of driving me to school, he drove me home because of my busted lip and knew it would raise a lot of questions if anyone were to see.
I got out the car quickly and ran into the house. I went to the bathroom and dabbed my tear stained face with a cloth.
In a matter of seconds I could hear my father’s footsteps. He banged on the door “Open the door Delray.” He demanded.
I did as I was told. My father glared daggers at me.
“…you did this to yourself.”
I cried harder “iv done NOTHING. Why do you do this to me! Why can’t we just move on with life happily! Mom would have wanted us to be happy not sad!”
He grabbed my hair like I was a rag doll and threw me across the room. My head hit the wall. I rubbed it as I looked up at him fearfully. He cocked his fist back a slammed it right on my face. I felt my eye grow swollen sure enough to leave my face a little bruised
“I buy you stuff...give you a roof over your head...this is how you repay me?”
“Then take all of it back, take it all back. I’ll move out...ill...I’ll give you everything you’ve brought me….i just want things to be normal again.” I begged.
“No...No it’s not going to be like that. You either get beatings or give in to me…which it is.”
I looked at him emptily. “The beatings…”
that’s the dad
As soon as I was done I walked down stairs to the kitchen where my sisters where. Each of them sat at the table eating cereal wearing the same uniform as I did. I grabbed the box of lucky charms and began fixing myself a bowel.
“Look who decided to come back.” Jamie commented.
I rolled my eyes “shuddap.” An threw some lucky charms at her. Tiffany glared at me from the other end of the table. When I sat down at my seat and grabbed the milk bottle to pour some into my bowel I looked at her from my cereal “what’s the matter with you?”
“YOU were supposed to talk to janku for me yesterday. “ I frown “shit…sorry tiff…I'm sorry…look ill do it for you today? I have art with him. By the end of the day the two of you will be dating” I gave her an on reassuring smile. She returned it back to me “thanks…sorry if I seem cranky about it…I just really like him…”
“Oh no you don’t… you like his MONEY. “ Tiffany gasped at Jamie. I dug my spoon in my cereal scooping some up and putting it in my mouth chewing it sheepishly. I knew for a fact an argument was about to start. I defiantly wasn’t going to get in between it. I'm in enough trouble as is.
Tiffany shot back at Jamie “SHUT up you doesn’t know anything. You’re so stupid sometimes!”
“Me? You’re the one chasing after someone who doesn’t want ANYTHING to do with you.”
Before this got out of hand even more, our step mother walked in.
“Ok, ok enough girls. Hurry up and finish your breakfast.” The two of them stopped but kept an intense glare among each other. This argument wasn’t over.
“Delray…I'm very disappointed in you honey...i thought you were better behaved then your sisters…but leaving the house without even notifying us is not acceptable.” She placed her hands on her hips.
“Mom...comes ON. KAGOME called to let you guys know….”
“You know better than to have SOMEONE else call for you. You could have been somewhere else so I and your father aren’t even sure she was telling the truth.”
She certainly was smart. “Ok...ok…I was wrong. But next time I go out I’ll let you and daddy know alright? “ I played the innocent role with the matching look a batted my pretty eyelashes at her. She smiled at me “ok. I’d like that. Now come on girls so I can drop you off.” My sisters stood up as well as I did, we each put our now empty bowels in the sink. We walked to the door to leave as soon as I opened it my father walked down stairs fumbling with his tie he looked a lot sober than he did last night
“Honey…remembers? I'm supposed to drive Delray to get her test present?”
Tiffany and Jamie smiled “we already went to go see ours. You have to go pick out yours” they smiled proudly. My step mom nodded happily “oh yeah…I forgot that you three scored the highest in your school.”
A cold feeling swept over me. I didn’t want to be alone with him… not now not ever.
“OH….cant it waits…? I mean I haven’t been in school for a day or two...so maybe I should go now a do this later on today?”
Mom shook her head “no can do. Your grounded an aren’t allowed to leave the house after school for awhile. And plus your father and I will be at work. So now is the time. Don’t worry I’ll tell the school you’ll be a bit late. Have fun. Nothing over 100,000” They walked out the house.
My dad placed a hand gently on my shoulder. It felt like acid on my skin… and I wanted it off. As soon as possible.
“Come on.we’ll have fun”
In the car...
It was quiet. Very quiet. I could feel my dad looking at me occasionally. But my eyes stayed on the window. Usually after drinking he could sometimes forget about what he’s done...sometimes he would remember and avoid me or act like I'm the worse child in the world. Anything was better than him being a raging drunk. But it didn’t take away my intimidation.
“So…” he cleared his throat loudly “how’s school going?”
He was trying to start a conversation. Hmm…I couldn’t tell if he remembered or not so I just played along like everything was perfect.
“Great…great…how’s work?”
“It’s good. I might be in for a promotion.”
I smiled at him. “That’s great daddy…” I could tell her was happy to see me smile at him.
We came to a stop light; he looked over at me “yeah...it is. Your mother always wanted us to do good you know…looks like her dream is coming true..” he waved his hand in a careless circular motion “you know…with my promotion and you girls getting great grades in school.”
I nod remembering my mother’s smiling face. “Yeah…you’re right…”
Daddy pushed the pedal and began driving again when the light turned green. When I looked at him I could see him smile slowly form into a sad one “I miss her. A lot…”
“I know daddy…we do to...”
“I think you and I are the only ones...your sisters are so…they just seem to of forgotten her.”
“What makes you say that?”
“I asked them if they are ready for this Saturday…they asked me what that was.”
I gasped. Feeling hurt. That was mom’s birthday. We went every year to her grave to put her favorite flowers on her grave.
I couldn’t believe they had forgotten.
“That’s…terrible.”
“You don’t know how angry I was…but I'm glad to see you still remember…”
A cold feeling rushed over me as I felt his hand go to my bare knee cap.
“Delly…you never disappoint me…I know I haven’t been the best dad in the world…with my...drinking...”
“You remember….”
He sighed sadly “yes. I'm sorry. It’s just…when I drink...it’s the only time I see your mom…I see her in you...not Ur sisters…just you. That’s why I love you so much. It’s like shes still here when I drink a when you’re near…”
“So…you see her now…” I said with fear. “No…I have to drink first... in order for me to her and you have to be around. Delly…I'm not proud of it…I know it hurts you...bnut you don’t understand how much it...”
“I lost mommy to…I do understand. But I'm not hurting anyone else in the family, I don’t see why you have to do it with me…you married hiraku did you not? She doesn’t satisfy you?”
“No…sometimes she doesn’t…I just feel better with you…I know you’re not your mother but...i don’t know delly...i just…I feel a lot better...when-“
“Dad I know you’re depressed I know your hurt...im willing to help you threw this...but I don’t want you to touch me like that... or hit me…cant things be how they use to be?”
“…I don’t know…..”
We ended the conversation at that.
The drive lasted for ten more minutes. We pulled up at a car lot. All of them looked very expensive.
We both got out of the car. My dad looked at me happily “pick ANY car you want. “
My mouth dropped open. I always wanted my own car...and here I was…about to get one. “Dad...this is cool! “ I ran to the red sports car. The giddy feeling inside of me faded when I saw the price tag “900, 00…………….damn…” my dad walked beside me, warpping his arm over my shoulder making me jump.
“You can have it…”
I looked up at his face “no...Mom said…” he shook his head “that was for your sisters… YOU get any car you want. No questions asked. It’s going to be our secret...” I didn’t feel too comfortable with this.
I told him no, but he brought it for me anyways. I was to come by to pick it up later on. He told me not to tell my step mum or my sisters of the price of the car...and that I would be OUR secret. I wish things would go back to normal.
He was now driving me to school. Which was great because I needed to get away from this man even if it was for a couple of hours.
I leaned my head on the window and closed my eyes. Feeling incredibly tired for some reason. Just when I was about to doze off to sleep land I felt some one rub my thigh. My eyes shot open “daddy…!”
I slapped his hand away from my thigh. “What the hell is wrong with you?”
“I know I'm not drunk...but that doesn’t mean I can’t love you right now does it?”
“YES it does. DON’T touch me at all daddies! I don’t like it when you do that I already cleared that up wi-!!” He back handed me roughly. I yelped out in pain cradling my bleeding lip. He’s never hit me that hard before in his life…
“Your so damn selfish…that’s all you are.” He growled under his breath. Instead of driving me to school, he drove me home because of my busted lip and knew it would raise a lot of questions if anyone were to see.
I got out the car quickly and ran into the house. I went to the bathroom and dabbed my tear stained face with a cloth.
In a matter of seconds I could hear my father’s footsteps. He banged on the door “Open the door Delray.” He demanded.
I did as I was told. My father glared daggers at me.
“…you did this to yourself.”
I cried harder “iv done NOTHING. Why do you do this to me! Why can’t we just move on with life happily! Mom would have wanted us to be happy not sad!”
He grabbed my hair like I was a rag doll and threw me across the room. My head hit the wall. I rubbed it as I looked up at him fearfully. He cocked his fist back a slammed it right on my face. I felt my eye grow swollen sure enough to leave my face a little bruised
“I buy you stuff...give you a roof over your head...this is how you repay me?”
“Then take all of it back, take it all back. I’ll move out...ill...I’ll give you everything you’ve brought me….i just want things to be normal again.” I begged.
“No...No it’s not going to be like that. You either get beatings or give in to me…which it is.”
I looked at him emptily. “The beatings…”
that’s the dad
♠ ♠ ♠
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