Status: Completed
Bloody Love
The Break
Clenching my hands into tight fists and grinding my teeth down to the gum, I watched your new play thing coddle you like he owned you. You could so easily forget the one you said you loved and flock to another, leaving me out the picture. My blood boiled. You saw my obvious irritation and you looked away like it was nothing. You should have been scared of my expression.
The more he touched you, the shorter his life would last. I hated his smile, the little gleam in his eye. I hated how he whispered in your ear and looked at me, like he was mocking me. He was making fun of me because he had you and I didn’t. He even dared to laugh like the wicked beast he was. My mind was splitting in two. My heart was pounding wildly but I couldn’t leave. I couldn’t leave you alone with him.
I cared for you greatly and still you laughed at my suffering. He enjoyed my humiliation. My body ached every passing second his hand never left yours. His fingers lingered over your skin. You giggled like a crazed hag and hugged him tightly. I quickly pushed myself away and stomped home, my hands still locked into balls.
I paced in my room. I needed to cool down. I was seconds from exploding. I wanted to talk to you calmly and tell you exactly how I felt about all of this: him and you and you and me. There was a constant buzz in the back of my head. It never faltered in its rhythm. I didn’t know which was worse: watching him with you or the god damned buzzing.
I couldn’t stop myself. I had to be near you. You were my drug and I was getting deeply deprived. I tried ignoring his mocking smile, his mocking eyes, his whole mocking face. I put up with it to be near you. I wasn’t going to let him run me off so easily.
I heard him whispering things to you like, “She’s so weird” and “Just tell her to leave”. This always made the buzzing in my head louder to an almost deafening tone. It blocked out all other noise sometimes. No one seemed to care about this little problem and I didn’t concern myself with it much, either. I was getting too excited about the upcoming event to care.
Your birthday was my favorite time of year. I always slept over your house. We would always stay up late, eat junk food, watch old cartoons, and just have fun. I looked forward to the quality time alone with you every year. I planned on giving you your birthday present at midnight for a special effect.
When I got to your house, on that very amazing day, I had a spring in my step. I walked in to find you waiting for me. My heart had taken to the skies by then. But, I noticed he was close behind you. He was there, too, on our night. The buzzing took over in my head. My body cracked when I moved. He hung on you like a lemur, distinguishing that you belonged to him, and you didn’t acknowledge my pain. You let me slowly die then without offering any help.
You and he went to bed before me, to the basement on your giant water bed where I was supposed to be. The stupid buzzing refused to give me a break. I tried shaking my head to get rid of the sound. It rebounded off my skull. I checked on you and him to see he was cradling you on his chest. The two of you slept soundlessly while my head screamed at the sight.
Everything was silent, aside from the beating buzz and crackling.. All I could feel was heat taking over my body, burning my flesh. It felt like my skin was crawling, moving around. The image of the two of you, wrapped together like a knot, embedded in my head and I bellowed in protest.
The more he touched you, the shorter his life would last. I hated his smile, the little gleam in his eye. I hated how he whispered in your ear and looked at me, like he was mocking me. He was making fun of me because he had you and I didn’t. He even dared to laugh like the wicked beast he was. My mind was splitting in two. My heart was pounding wildly but I couldn’t leave. I couldn’t leave you alone with him.
I cared for you greatly and still you laughed at my suffering. He enjoyed my humiliation. My body ached every passing second his hand never left yours. His fingers lingered over your skin. You giggled like a crazed hag and hugged him tightly. I quickly pushed myself away and stomped home, my hands still locked into balls.
I paced in my room. I needed to cool down. I was seconds from exploding. I wanted to talk to you calmly and tell you exactly how I felt about all of this: him and you and you and me. There was a constant buzz in the back of my head. It never faltered in its rhythm. I didn’t know which was worse: watching him with you or the god damned buzzing.
I couldn’t stop myself. I had to be near you. You were my drug and I was getting deeply deprived. I tried ignoring his mocking smile, his mocking eyes, his whole mocking face. I put up with it to be near you. I wasn’t going to let him run me off so easily.
I heard him whispering things to you like, “She’s so weird” and “Just tell her to leave”. This always made the buzzing in my head louder to an almost deafening tone. It blocked out all other noise sometimes. No one seemed to care about this little problem and I didn’t concern myself with it much, either. I was getting too excited about the upcoming event to care.
Your birthday was my favorite time of year. I always slept over your house. We would always stay up late, eat junk food, watch old cartoons, and just have fun. I looked forward to the quality time alone with you every year. I planned on giving you your birthday present at midnight for a special effect.
When I got to your house, on that very amazing day, I had a spring in my step. I walked in to find you waiting for me. My heart had taken to the skies by then. But, I noticed he was close behind you. He was there, too, on our night. The buzzing took over in my head. My body cracked when I moved. He hung on you like a lemur, distinguishing that you belonged to him, and you didn’t acknowledge my pain. You let me slowly die then without offering any help.
You and he went to bed before me, to the basement on your giant water bed where I was supposed to be. The stupid buzzing refused to give me a break. I tried shaking my head to get rid of the sound. It rebounded off my skull. I checked on you and him to see he was cradling you on his chest. The two of you slept soundlessly while my head screamed at the sight.
Everything was silent, aside from the beating buzz and crackling.. All I could feel was heat taking over my body, burning my flesh. It felt like my skin was crawling, moving around. The image of the two of you, wrapped together like a knot, embedded in my head and I bellowed in protest.