Affliction

Auburn stood, staring at the pill container clutched in her hand.

"I can do this," she said to herself.

The hardest part of suicide is not physically killing yourself but having the will to do so.

"You want this," she tried to convince herself. "You've always wanted this."

Auburn was tired of the sadness; the loneliness; the depression. She wore a fake smile so often that it wouldn't wear away. Everyday was pure misery. So what was the point of living?

We all die in the end anyway. Nobody makes it out alive.

The pills, they were her way out. She wouldn't have to feel anymore. She could finally be free.

"I can't do this," the girl cried, shaking her head.

She ran to the phone and dialed a number she knew all too well. It rang and rang and rang. "Pick up god dammit!" She held the phone in her shaking hands.

A tired sounding voice picked up. "Hello?" he grunted.

"Andy." Her voice broke, breaking into a sob.

"Auburn, what's wrong?" he said, alert and worried.

"I can't do this anymore." Silence.

"Can't do what? What can't you do?" It rushed out quickly, his voice filled with concern.

"Life. Everything. It's too much. It's not worth it." Her crying was uncontrollable now. The tears poured down her face, her sobs getting louder and louder.

"Auburn, don't say that. You have so much to live for." Andy never had seen this side of her. She had always been an outgoing happy girl, always having a smile on her face. She loved to tell jokes and make people laugh. This wasn't her. This wasn't Auburn.

"What do I have to live for?" she said angrily. "Nobody gives a shit about me anymore."

"You have me. That's what you can live for!" he yelled. How could she even threaten to take her life away from her parents; her friends; from him. "We've known each other for so long. I just can't forget about you. I need you as much as you need me," he cried.

"You say you need me. You'll cry over me for the first week or so. Everyone will. And then my memory," she paused, holding back a sob. "My memory will just fade away."

"Don't say that!" he yelled. "I could never forget about you. You're my best fucking friend. I trust you with my life! I love you more than my own fucking family!"

She shook her head, not wanting to hear those words. Auburn kept trying to convince herself he didn't need her. Nobody did. Not anymore.

"I love you too Andy, I love you too," she sobbed. "But if you really loved me, you'd let me go."

"NO!" he cried."I don't care. Call me a selfish bastard. I'm not letting you do this. You can't leave me!"

"Andy, please don't do this to me. Please," she whispered.

"Auburn," his voice broke, crying. "You--" He sobbed into the phone. "You can't go. Life's hard, it always will be. But that's exactly what it is. It's a part of life. There'll be ups and downs. But no matter what, I'll be there. Auburn, I'm always here."

All he heard was her crying through the phone. You could hear the pain in her cries. It made Andy cringe.

"Andy, you're my only reason to live," she whispered. He took a deep breathe. Andy finally felt himself feel calm. She wasn't going to kill herself. He moved back to his bed and layed down, drained of all his energy. Her life was so fragile, he realized. It had almost slipped through his hands. It had--

"But I'll never love you, as much as you love me. And that's why I need to go."

"AUBURN!" he screamed into the dead silence.

"I love you." The line went dead.