Nightmare

And his reflect in the mirror called out to him when the brightness came on, it called and said, “Hate to twist your mind but God ain´t on your side… They took for granted your soul and now it´s ours to steal”. By then whatever was going on seemed too real, more real than reality itself, just a persistent authenticity. And when in reality it looked like real life was hell, ´cause that meant that every single thing you do will mark a positive or negative ´x´ in your life.

I´m sorry, Johnny… I shouldn’t have taken you for granted; I shouldn’t have thought you´d be ok… I never thought this could become true. I am so sorry.

Matt whispered next to a hospital bed, and Johnny saw who it was that laid there, it was him; pale and dirty, with bruises all over and a black eye, but it was him.

Matt´s eyes spat tears, and Brian came into the scene. Disgrace all over his face. A tear rolled down his left cheek.

“Why didn´t you stop me?” Matt hissed, knowing it was Syn who´d come in.

Johnny saw this like he´d see a movie on the big screen, but this was so much more real.

“Matt… I tried… I, I didn´t want to hurt you; when I thought of a way of stopping you without hurting you… It was too late.”

“I can´t live with myself anymore, I can´t… How could I do this?”

Do what? Matt… Johnny knew how that went, they couldn’t hear him, but the question had to be answered. Had Matt…?

“You were drunk…”

“No fucking excuse!” Matt roared, a hoarse yet strong voice echoed.

Zacky and Jimmy came into the room this time, both with bloodshot eyes and pouts.

“I did it.” Matt looked at his two friends dead in the eyes, one at a time.

“You did what?” Zacky asked; a nasal voice from all the snot that streamed while crying.

“I… I… God… I did that to him.” Matt sniffed. “I killed him.”

Zacky´s and Jimmy´s eyes grew into four huge staring balls, they stared at Matt.

Johnny didn´t know if he stood there or not, but his mouth did hang open, and his eyes did grow with disbelief and betrayal.

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Then,

Johnny woke up; whether it was dark or not that was out of topic. What he did know was that he wasn´t home, and he wasn’t done yet. He still didn´t know why these things were happening or whether they were real or not.

What´d he done to deserve all that, and all that was yet to come? Well, he had done something, but he couldn´t really remember and that was the worst part of it all, along with not knowing if what he saw before was true, had Matt really killed him? He was dead, all right, but had he been killed by the hand of one of his best friends; fuck, one of his brothers? Had he done something that evil?

He´d never know… was there a never anymore? Was there anything at all that counted? Johnny doubted it, but what did that matter. Nothing mattered.