I Believe That You Belong to Me

I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m a huge idiot. For me to say yes to going to the home of people I know terrify me I hate, I have to be. I don’t know what part of my brain allowed me to say yes. I don’t know what part of my brain made me get back in that car and silently watch it drop Bella off. To be honest, I don’t really remember the drive at all. I don’t remember getting in the front after Bella had gotten out or the car getting on the freeway. I must have blacked out, because now I’m sitting in front of a house that really should only exist in a catalogue.

I don’t know how long I stared at the house, but it must have been a while, because Edward had to again touch my shoulder to get my attention. I didn’t bother turning the fear the motion gave me to anger, I knew that being in the house with the zombie-like people the fear, however irrational, would constantly be present.

“Are you going to sit here and gawk all day or are we going to go inside?” I blankly turned to look into the eyes that strongly resembled piss and again I saw concern in them. Maybe he thought I was crazy, he could very well be right. I do fear hate his family for no reason.

I couldn’t answer him though. The house, excuse me, Mansion was beautiful, but I couldn’t bring myself to move from the car. No matter how bad it smelled.

Edward didn’t wait long for me to speak, he simply got out of the car and walked around to my side and opened the door. My brain wasn’t really working right so I didn’t really get what he was doing until after he had pulled me from the car and set my heart racing—and not in the good way.

“Ok-ok I’m out!” I pulled from his grasp as fast as I could. The touch of his hand on my own was much more painful than his touch on my shoulder.

“If you’re too tired, I can take you home,” He offered, the worry in his eyes thickening.

“No…I’m fine. Just a little nervous” That wasn’t a complete lie. Nerves do originate from fear. Honestly I did want to take up his offer, but I knew that putting this off would just make next time even worse. For that reason, I followed him into his home.

The first thing I noticed, well besides the elaborate beauty of the mansion, was that it was empty. I did not see his siblings nor did I see his mother. This should have made me feel better, but it did the opposite actually.

“Where is everybody?” I asked still scoping out the house wishing someone would appear. I did not want to be alone with Edward Cullen.

“I believe Alice took everyone shopping right after school. Esme is most likely out in her garden. And you know Carlisle has his work,” he explained leading me up the stairs to his room.

As much as I hated Edward and his smell and his strange looks, I have to admit he had a pretty cool room. I could tell from the various bookshelves that like I, he loved to read and that his taste in music was nearly as random as my own. I wasn’t going to tell him that though. Didn’t want him thinking that our common traits could make us friends.

He took a seat on his desk chair and I followed suit sitting on one of his reading chairs. I regretted the motion the moment I did. Sitting down caused the cushion to flatten and spew his sickly sweet scent into the air around me. The smell didn’t just burn my nostrils it very nearly suffocated me. I thought his car was bad, but I could taste the scent so much I was forced to fight nausea.

“Are you alright?” I rolled my eyes and sat on the floor, the room still smelled but it wasn’t so concentrated there.

“Are you trying to break a record?” He focused his confused gaze on me.

“I’m afraid, I don’t understand your question”

“How many times today are you going to ask me if I’m alright? It’s incredibly annoying”

“As many times as you make me. You always seem to be uncomfortable around me and now you look green” I tried not to, but I had to laugh at the latter part of his sentence.

“How in the world could I look green? If you haven’t noticed, I am black” I stifled my laugh a little to see his reaction, but all I saw was shock and…amazement.

“What? Did you reall--

“No, I know, looking green is a figure of speech,” He finally said, his face still looking amazed.

“I know that, but it’s just never been used to describe me or any other black person I know. Dude why do you look so shocked?”

“Your…laugh…so…” His loss of words immediately caused me to stop laughing and look down. I never thought my laugh was attractive, but I also never thought it was as horrible as he seems to think it is.

“Sorry” I don’t know why, but his thoughts on my laugh made me feel horrible. I hate him, his thoughts shouldn't matter.

“Why are you apologizing…and why did you stop?” I looked up again, was he making fun of me? I expected to see disgust on his face, but what I saw was annoyance. The kind of annoyance one gets when their favorite song stops suddenly because of a scratched CD or a power outage.

“Huh?” Now I was confused.

“This may sound…strange…but your laugh…is…beautiful…sounds better than a baby's laughter…which I didn’t think was possible.” Yep, he was definitely making fun of me.

“I’m serious”

“Sure you are,” I said rolling my eyes. What a load of bull. I pulled the book from my bag with hopes of finally beginning. I honestly don’t know why, but my feelings were hurt and I didn’t care to let him know that.

“You never did answer my question,” Edward said, he too pulling out his book.

“Yes, I’m fine”

“I’d be more inclined to stop asking, if you told the truth.”

“You want the truth?” I asked pulling my eyes from the pages in the book to meet his. He nodded his head, his eyes still holding that strange annoyance.

“You do make me uncomfortable. There are many reasons why, but the one for today is that you can’t take a hint. And you smell. No offense, but you smell really bad” The annoyance on his face quickly turned into the smirk I had come to hate. Again with the no hint taking.

“I can take a hint. I simply choose to ignore them. Your reactions are quite funny. And it’s a shame you think I smell so bad…

In an instant he was off his chair and hovering over me, his face snuggling into the crook of my neck. I could feel his nose trail up and down my skin. My heart was suddenly pounding so hard my ears were ringing and again this was not the good heart racing.

“Because you…smell…so good.” My body froze. I couldn’t feel anything but the sudden touch of his lips to my skin. And just as fast as the touch had come it was gone. He jumped away from me looking more than just guilty.

I didn’t spare him a second glance. I quickly grabbed my book and bag and tried to run out his door. He had other plans, however, he grabbed my right wrist and pulled me back into the room.

“Pl-please don’t run…I’m so sorry” I chanced a glance in his direction and saw even more guilt clouded by sorrow in his now obsidian colored eyes. The small, but strong change in detail caused my heart to go even faster and I think he felt it, because his hold on my wrist tightened.

“Acerielle, I promise that this will never happen again…just please…I beg of you don’t run…”

“W-why should I believe you..? Why the hell shouldn’t I run right now?!” His hold grew even tighter as I questioned him. It didn’t hurt, but any tighter and it most definitely would.

“Because it…would hurt too much”

“Huh”

“I can’t…” I didn’t wait for him to continue, he was already scaring and confusing me too much.

“Edward are you a zombie?” His hold on my wrist dropped the moment the laugh tore through his lips. I was still too afraid to move, even though I now was free to leave.

“No…I’m not…a-a…zombie” He finally answered in between laughs.

“Are y-you g-going t-to k-kill me?” My voice shook so much it didn’t sound like my own.

Edward stopped his laughing and pulled me into his arms. The motion should have made me scream, but strangely, it calmed me.

“No...that too, would hurt too much” I pushed away from him after that, his scent getting to me.

“I don’t understand”

“I know…we could finish this some other time, preferably in public…I’ll take you home?”

In truth I didn’t want to be alone in the car with him, not after what he had said and done. I didn’t trust him, but I trusted his mother even less, I didn’t know her. So for that reason, I got in the car and rode with him in silence.

“Are you ever going to explain what just happened to me?” I finally asked, the silence uncomfortable.

“Yes.” I waited for him to explain, but he said nothing.

“Edward I--

“Another time. For right now it’s best if I don’t speak at all. You have no idea how much you tempt me” What the hell is that supposed to mean?

I jumped out of the car the moment he stopped in front of my house. I wanted to be as far away from him and his odd behavior as possible. I had no reason to be afraid before, but now I definitely had one.

Edward was not a zombie.

But he definitely wasn’t human either.