But Would It Do More Harm This Way?

I woke up, once again crying. Shaun pulled me into a hug. "Another bad dream?" He asked. I nodded. I wiped away the tears. "Wanna talk about it?" Shaun asked, his eyes full of concern. I shook my head, "not really." He nodded understandingly. I decided to go for a shower. I let the warm water soak into my skin, enjoying the feel of it. Once I was done, I got dressed and went into Shaun's and mine room.

I put my SIM card back into my phone and turned it on. There were many missed calls and messages. Majority were from Kevin, a few were from Tamara and there was one from my mother. Just then, my phone began vibrating in my hand. I read the caller ID: Mum. I took a deep breath before answering.

"Hello?" I asked, my voice slightly shaky. "What have you done?!" She yelled through the phone, making me jump. "What do you mean?" I asked. "Don't play dumb with me! Why would you leave Kevin?! He treated you WAY better than you deserved! Who else would want you?" She was drunk. She always was.

My eyes became watery, but I refused to cry. I wouldn't give her the satisfaction. "I deserve so much better than he treated me! And I have found someone who actually loves me, someone who wants me. So don't you dare tell me that no one will ever love me." I said firmly. "It won't last long. Soon he'll realise who you really are, then he'll leave you. And when he does, I just hope that Kevin will take you back, because he's the only person who'll ever have you." She said.

I hung up. I'd heard enough. I blinked away the tears before they could fall. "Felicity?" Shaun asked quietly from the door. I turned to face him. He looked down at my hand which had my phone in it. "Kevin?" He asked. I shook my head. "My mum." "Then why are you crying?" He asked, walking over to me. He touched my cheek gently. They were wet; I hadn't even noticed. I wiped the tears away quickly. "No reason."

"Felicity, please tell me." I sighed. "My mother, she never really loved me. She told me I ruined her life and would never amount to anything. She was always drinking. She used to beat me. She was the one who got me to date Kevin. She knew what he was like, but she didn't care. She thought it would 'straighten me out' and I would 'learn some manners.' I was always a disappointment to her. All I ever wanted to do was please her, and what did I get? Beatings/ Being told I was an accident, that she never wanted me and she regretted not getting an abortion." I told him, trying to hold back the tears but failing.

"What about your father?" Shaun asked me. "I never knew who he was." I answered through my tears. Shaun wrapped his arms around me, allowing me to cry into his chest. "I'm sorry." "Why are you apologising?" I asked, confused. "It's not like you did anything." "I just feel sorry for you." He said. "She told me to get back with Kevin." I told him after a while of silence, besides my crying. "What?! Is she serious?!" I nodded. He held onto me even tighter. "I'm not letting either of them near you."

My phone rang...again. Shaun took it from me before I had a chance to look. He answered it. "How dare she? How dare you!" He yelled through the phone after a few moments. "Someone who loves and cares for her." A small smile crept its way onto my face. He was such a sweet heart. "What do you mean who she really is?" Oh shit. He took the phone away from his ear, looking at it confused. He then looked at me.

I took the phone from him, not looking at him. "Felicity, what did she mean?" "I-I don't know." I stuttered, still looking away from him. "Felicity..." Before he could say anymore, I walked out of the room. He followed me, grabbing onto my arm gently. "Felicity, what did she mean by 'the real you'?" He asked. I remained silent. "Please talk to me." He begged. I shook my head, pulling me arm from his grip.

I walked out the front door and down the street. I heard Shaun calling my name. I started running. I kept running until I felt like my legs were jelly. I sat down in a grassy area, exhausted. This place looked oddly familiar, but I couldn't remember where I'd seen it before. I heard footsteps from behind me, coming closer. The person was breathing heavier than normal. My heart rate increased rapidly. It was then that I remembered why this place was familiar. Kevin and I had come here once on a date, before I realised who he truly was and what he was like.

The person was know kneeling behind me. I closed my eyes. praying it wasn't who I thought it was. "Felicity." The person breathed. I sighed in relief. "Hi Tammy." "What's up?" She asked. I turned around to face her. "Mum called...Shaun answered the phone. She said something about who I really am and now he wants to know. I can't tell Shaun!" I explained. "Oh, honey, it'll be ok. He'll understand. He loves you!" She assured me, hugging me. "I hope so." I sighed.