Half a Sin

After the band practice, what ended at 8 o'clock in the evening, Elisabet, Mary and Kristofer went home, to Elisabet flat. The cooked dinner, ate it, watched a movie on TV and then at ten, Elisabet put Kristofer to sleep. When she got back, Mary was waiting for her on the living room sofa with two beers. She knew that Mary had something she wanted to talk about. So Elisabet sat next to her and looked at her. Mary took a breath and started.

"Ville called today, when you were on stage."
"What did he want?"
"Don't know, he didn't say. But he didn't sound angry or anything."
"That's weird."
"He's a good guy. I'm sure he was angry at first, but when he understood that he can't lose you, he forgave you. You should call him."
"I don't know if I can."
"You should. The man loves you."
"And I love him, but I made a mess. You know what they say: you can fix a broken mirror, but you can still see the cracks."
"You two can get over this. Don't made this worse."
"Maybe you're right."
"I'm always right. Listen, I'm gonna go home and you call him."

Mary hugged Elisabet, took her coat and handbag from the chair next to the door, waved and left the flat. She lived across the street so it wasn't a long walk home. When she stepped out of the house, she saw Ville standing there.

"Hi Ville, what are you doing here?"
"Hi Mary. I'm just thinking."
"Of what? If you are debating on going up to see her or not, then I'd say go. You two are made for each other."
"How can you know that?"
"She has been my best friends since we were like twelve. I have been with her trough bad break ups and I was there when Kristofer was born. I have been her rock for years now and I think I have the right to know when I see something, or in this case someone, who is perfect for her."
"I didn't know you knew her that long."
"Most people who meet us, think we are sisters."
"I didn't make that notice."
"Well, if her hair would be dark brown again, you would. Just go up there."

And with that Mary left and crossed the street to her apartment building. She smiled to herself that maybe now, Elisabet had found another rock she could lean on.

Meanwhile, Elisabet was on the balcony, smoking. It was a bad habit and she knew it. Before Kristofer, she had smoked half a pack a day. After her son was born, she smoked when she was upset. At this point she was so upset that she had smoked six cigarettes in the time it took to Mary go. So in five minutes. She hated the smell of smoke. It made her sick, but she couldn't stop it. She didn't have anything to make her break this bad, bad habit.

Suddenly, she heard the front door open and closed. She thought that maybe Mary forgot something, so she didn't make anything of it. She just sat on the balcony and took another drag of her cigarette.

Ville closed the door lightly behind him, not to wake Kristofer. He knew that he was asleep, because when Mary slipped the keys to Elisabet's flat in his hand, she told him to be very silent. So he took off his shoes and looked around the living room. Just the TV showed any light on the room. There were two beer bottles on the living room table, but no sign of Elisabet. Then he felt a small and cold amount of air coming from the balcony door. He saw Elisabet sitting on a chair, taking another cigarette from the pack.

"I didn't know you smoked," Ville said silently, almost whispering.

Elisabet didn't turn around. She couldn't face him.

"I'm sorry I didn't call you earlier or that I didn't write. I needed time to think. And when Mary said you were practicing with a band for tomorrow, I had to come and see that. But before that, I had to talk with you."

Elisabet still didn't turn around. Still couldn't face him.

"I wanted to tell you that I'm not mad at you. I'm mad at myself. Because I did the same thing to you."

Elisabet turned to face him, when those words left his lips.

"I guess we are even now," was all she could say.

Ville moved closer to her and sat on a chair next to her.

"But I don't want to be even."
"Well, it wasn't like we were dating or anything, so maybe we shouldn't be thinking about anything that we did what was wrong and just move on," she said looking him straight into his eyes.

Ville didn't say anything, nor did he move. He just sat there, watching her beautiful blue eyes. He loved her and everything about this situation was killing him.