Summer Skies and Ocean Eyes

“How did Tommy’s brother kill himself?”

I could feel the blood literally stop in my veins as the only part of me that moved were my eyes, growing wider and wider. Emily’s hand stopped, hovering over her surfboard with a piece of wax gripped tightly in her fingers.

“What?” she asked, like she might have missed something. The truth was, she had a right to be surprised. Ever since I started becoming closer with Tommy and Poot, I began to become more and more curious about things that probably weren’t my business to know. The question had been crawling through my mind these past couple days, then suddenly decided to come spewing out of my mouth like a disease.

My cheeks heated as I gripped my toes into the sand where I sat. We hadn’t even been talking about Tommy or Drew or anything that could have remotely related to what I had just asked. In fact, the last thing we had a conversation about before breaking into a comfortable silence was how we mutually found something creepy about monkeys.

No wonder Emily was looking so confused right now.

“I...” My lips contorted into what could have possibly turned into words, but to no avail. Over the sound of waves I could hear Mrs. Kang’s iPod blaring from where she did a dance cardio workout from their back porch. The shore of the ocean at high tide was within two-hundred feet of their house, something only a doctor like Emily’s dad could afford.

The house, Emily had told me, was one of the main reasons her parents had separated but remained married. She didn’t talk about it much, though when she did, it came spilling out of her mouth like a river that wouldn’t stop.

Like mine had moments ago, but the difference between the two instances was that she had a right to spew, and I didn’t.

Emily sighed, squishing her nose as she squinted at the horizon. After conditioning today, the daily storm clouds had started to roll in a little earlier than usual. A chunk of the sky was beginning to darken. After we had declined her mother’s offer to do a follow-up workout, Emily wanted to get in a little surfing before lightning started to strike.

Her hand dropped the block of wax back to the board with a soft clunk, then she finally started scraping the two together again. I could see all the muscles in her thin arm move as she pressed the substance against the smooth surface.

“Tommy or Poot haven’t told you yet?” she quietly asked, suddenly appearing ten times more weary. It wasn’t a look I was used to seeing on her face.

I mentally cringed, it had slipped my mind that Emily also had been friends with Drew. It made my stomach sick to think of how I had trampled so thoughtlessly onto something so delicate.

“Well, no- but never mind. Really. Seriously. I shouldn’t have asked,” I choppily said, trying to muster up the best apologetic face as I turned to her. “I’m sorry.”

Emily’s bob moved with each stretch and pull of her arm, her lips were tightened into a thin line. My shoulders dropped to the ground we were sitting side-by-side on as I guiltily looked at the ocean.

“I figured that since you’ve been hanging around with them a lot, you would have heard something by now.” Her voice was quiet and careful, nothing like the girl who had successfully tackled me at the end of conditioning--just for fun.

For once, I felt uncomfortable in the heated sand, but sat still. A group of kids a couple houses down the beach were screeching as they ran into the water, then sprinted away from each wave the came crashing back to the shore.

“No. But it’s fine. That was so, incredibly stupid of me,” I babbled on, feeling my throat tighten as I struggled to make it better. I didn’t like it when Emily looked so upset, knowing I caused it.

Perhaps it would help if I would think before I spoke. Or maybe I should just sew my mouth shut and never speak again.

“It wasn’t stupid,” Emily calmly replied, once again putting a pause on waxing her board. She turned toward me, large, seal-brown eyes unblinking as she gave me a look that made goosebumps rise on my skin. “If you really want to know, I’ll tell you...Do you?”

I paused to really consider if I wanted to know, feeling as if it would open up some kind of Pandora’s Box that I might not even have a right to touch in the first place. But, before Emily had the question, I already knew the answer.

“Yeah.” The word came out like a long breath off my lips. Emily somberly nodded, then pushed her surfboard and wax to the side.

“He overdosed. Pills.”

She had said it like ripping off a band-aid, so quick and subtle that it felt like someone had shoved their hand right in front of my face without much warning. The roar of the waves crashed fifteen feet from us, causing the water to current toward our feet, missing the toes by inches.

“Oh.” It was all I could think to say. Emily nodded again, taking a deep breath like the expanding of her lungs would help push out the heavy feeling in her chest.

“The Rose family, Tommy and Drew included, were always pretty secretive. Even being friends with them since kindergarten, I didn’t know Drew took anti-depression meds or that he went to a therapist until about a year before he died.” Another long sigh as she looked up at the incoming clouds.

I pressed my tongue against the roof of my mouth to try and keep the sickly feeling in my gut from spreading. But, it was done. I had asked, and Emily had answered. She didn’t talk about why she thought Drew...did what he did, and for that, I was almost thankful. It could have been a long range of things, but all I could think about was how that bruise looked so painfully deep in Tommy’s skin.

“I always complained about how Tommy changed,” Emily quietly continued, head still tilted, “But really, I can’t blame him. He...he’s never had the easiest life, and sometimes, I think he felt like all he really had was Poot and Drew.”

Slowly raising my eyes to look at her, my heart thudded uneasily in my chest. The clouds swerving toward us did nothing to help the smothered feeling that was overtaking me.

“I mean, his family was messed up enough before anything with drew happened.” She said it carefully, almost to herself like she had forgotten I was there. Did she know about Tommy’s dad? By the look in her eyes, something pulled at my head to think that she did.

Why had she never done something about it?
 As Emily wordlessly reached over and grabbed her board again, starting to wax the already-waxed plaster, I laid back into the squishy sand. The sky was becoming more and more of a dull blue, it was even more saddening to look at.

So I closed my eyes.

My body could still feel the heat and mugginess of the air. The sound of wax being hit onto the board went shoog, shoog, accompanying the ocean waves that brought a salty taste to my tongue. There was a new question looming over me now, like some infinite rain cloud:

Am I ever going to do something about it?

☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼

The next day, I went to morning yoga with Mom--much to her unsuppressed delight--and passed up going running with Emily and the girls. After my second session, I was starting to feel a brand new kind of sore. I guess that was what I deserved for being so competitive with something like yoga; I couldn’t stand seeing others doing better than me, no matter how much more practice they had.

Like every Friday morning, Mom skirted off with Yvette after she got home and changed. The two of them had some tradition of getting a fancy, healthy breakfast at some café, where they would sip on herbal tea and people-watch.

After showering, I dried my hair and got dressed in a pair of worn jean shorts and a t-shirt. The box on my dresser that I had always tried my best to ignore caught my eye as I reached down for a hoodie. Pausing, I tentatively reached over and grabbed it, peeking inside at the heart-shaped diamond.

With a gulp at how expensive it looked, I took it out of the case and secured it around my neck. Fingers gently pressing it against my chest, I nodded to no one in particular.

Distracting myself so I wouldn’t think about it anymore, I pulled a MSU green Michigan State University sweatshirt over my torso. Out of all the colleges in Michigan, it had always been my number-one choice. Though, I realized for the first time as I stared at my reflection in my mirror, I now had the option of going to a university in Florida for the same in-state tuition costs.

What schools were even in Florida? I tried my best to sift through my mind for the answer as I walked downstairs, bewildered at a sudden onslaught of new options for next year. I had been so busy trying to acclimate myself to my new home, I had almost forgotten to begin to plan anything for my freshman year of college.

“Why are you looking at the ground like, all spacey like that?” Kendall’s voice tugged me out of my thoughts, I had wandered into the living room. I blankly blinked at her, she was up? She crossed her arms and popped her hip out impatiently when I didn’t reply. I couldn’t get over the fact that it was barely eight o’clock and she was awake, showered, and dressed.

Like she could read my mind, she rolled her eyes. “Okay, whatever. I know what you’re about to say, and you can save the Sarcastic Calico Comment. Yes, I’m up, no, this isn’t a sign that the world is ending, blah blah blah, and I need a favor.”

Before I could reply, she sucked in a quick breath and whipped around to face the couch, her hair blowing out around her like sunlight as she picked something up from the cushion. Clutching it against her chest, covering it with her arms, she turned back to me. I could see the nerves waving across her face as she hesitated, unsure for a break of seconds.

“Kendall, I-”

“IneedyoutogivemearidetotheNaplesBranchoftheG.YoungMarineLaboratory.” The words shot off her lips so fast, I barely could catch them before they went whizzing past. Face in a determined frown, she stiffly waited for my reply in a defensive stance with her legs spread shoulder-width apart.

“You need me- to give you- the marine laboratory?” I pieced together what I had heard. Kendall’s whole body loosened in vexation. Still holding on to whatever was pressed against her chest, one of her eyes hung irritatedly halfway down.

“I accepted the internship,” she said in a toneless voice. “I need you. To give me. A ride to the marine lab. So I can turn my papers in.”

First Tommy, now Calico--why was everyone starting to talk to me like I only had half a brain? I couldn’t help that-

Then, it dawned on me what Kendall had said.

“No way!” I squealed, feeling elated even though she was the one who had gotten the position. Hopping over to her, I placed my hands excitedly on her shoulders to give her a little Happy Shake. Kendall’s head bobbled loosely on her neck as she tried to act annoyed with me, but as much as she squished her eyebrows in a scowl, her mouth curved into a smile. “Congratulations! I’m so proud of you! I can’t believe that you chose-”

“You’re going to snap my head off my neck!” she whined, cutting me off. I stopped Happy Shaking her, pulling my hands back to my sides as I bounced lightly on the balls of my feet. Straightening out her hair so that it sat perfectly again, Kendall composed herself and stood up straighter.

“Anyway, they wanted me to drop off my papers today, and then they have some books, manuals, and textbooks they want me to pick up. Could you take me?”

I nodded, already stepping to where the keys to the car Jon had given me were resting on the keyplate. “Of. Course.”

It wasn’t until we were on our way--me finally figuring out how to work the fancy-schmancy GPS in the car--when I asked Kendall what Jon had done when he found out. I couldn’t picture him jumping up and down like me, and I was positive he didn’t know how to Happy Shake, but he had probably been just as excited, if not more, than I was.

“I haven’t told him yet,” Kendall simply said from the passenger seat, looking out the window like it was no big deal. Her papers were neatly stacked in her lap, always clutched tightly by her hands with coral-pink fingernails.

“What?” I reminded myself to keep my focus on the road as I had the impulse to let go of the wheel and turn toward her. Out of the corner of my eye, I watched her shrug. “Why not?”

Kendall reached forward and adjusted the air-conditioner, which I instantly toggled back. “It’s not that simple. I just decided to sign the papers two days ago, and I knew that if I told Dad, he’d tell everyone else.”

Her fingers curved around the paper even more, causing it to slightly crinkle. “He wouldn’t have hesitated to tell my mom, they still e-mail each other back and forth when she wants to check in on me and Griffin.”

I was about to ask why her mother would be anything short of ecstatic for her obviously talented daughter, but I bit my tongue once remembering the last time I had tried to ask.

Still looking out the window, Kendall surprised me by continuing. “Then I didn’t want my mom to find out about this before I turned in my stuff.” She held up the papers, staring hard at them. “By signing these, I agree to a whole year of work at the G. Young Marine Laboratory, there’s no going back. I wanted to make the decision on my own, and I know that as soon as my Mom found out, she would be calling me and telling me not to take the opportunity. It’s stupid, but I feel like that would have changed my choice.”

Huffing heavily through her nose, she laid the papers firmly against her lap. “And I know that right now, I’m making the right one.”

I couldn’t help but smile, impressed by the first piece of true maturity I had seen from Kendall. The girl that had laid on my bed my first couple days in Naples had completely transformed--if only for this car ride, but I accepted it anyway.

“I think that’s really smart, Kendall.” It was a horrible way to sum up how I felt, but I think she appreciated it, all the same. “Once your mom hears about it, maybe she’ll be able to see just how right it is for you.”

Kendall nodded. “My Mom just always wanted me to be completely like her, you know, work in fashion. Up until junior high, I like, thought I really wanted that too. But then I realized how much I liked biology, and I rocked at it. Sharks had always been my favorite animal, anyway. I know she’s going to be disappointed, but whatever.”

“Yeah.” I blindly reached over with my elbow and playfully nudged at her. “Whatever.”

After finding the marine center, located on the other side of a lush forest, Kendall told me to wait in the car after I parked. She had to take another series of calming, self-assuring breaths before she opened the car door and strutted toward the squat, rectangular building. It was within half a mile of the shore of a rocky patch of beach, though from where I sat in the parking lot, I could see some trails leading away from the building that disappeared into the forest. They must have led to other sections of beach.

Keeping the car running, Kendall emerged from the building with a bright smile on her face, struggling to carry a stack of books half the size she was back to my car. Opening the door, I hurried to help her, taking half of her load before piling it in the back seat.

Once we were all set, I backed out of the parking spot. “So, you did it.”

“I did it!” she exclaimed, losing her usual chill-self as she victoriously raised her arms. They sharply smacked against the top of my car, only allowing her to expand them so far. “Ow!”

But she was still smiling as she cradled her arms, tapping her feet. The books in the back seat slid around as I turned. Looking behind my shoulder for a moment, I shook my head.

“That’s a lot of reading, Kendall.” I was someone who actually loved to read, and the look of the technical array of books behind me was intimidating. The girl looked absolutely at peace with it, leaning into the back of her chair with ease.

“I can’t wait to get started.”

☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼

“So, why aren’t you going?” Tommy was talking to me like I was a toddler again. Somehow, he was making this whole situation sound like I was doing something bad.

Agitatedly blowing hair out of my face, I wished he could see the expression I was giving him as I held my cell phone to my ear. As surprised and embarrassedly happy that he had called me, there was no way I was going to act any different.

“Thomas, I just told you. I don’t have money for more gas and a 3D ticket right now, and the last thing I want to do is bum it off of Jon,” I explained with a controlled tone. He didn’t understand what I had been saying: unable to comprehend the money-mooch woes I had. I was already wearing the necklace Jon bought me and drove the car he had surprised me with, that was more than enough.

But to him, cash was always there, he never had to ask for it. He had a credit card linked to his parent’s account, Poot had told me they let him do as he pleased with it.

“That’s. Dumb,” he grumbled, as if it was literally the stupidest thing he had every heard his whole life. I slumped deeper into the plush couch, almost disappearing right into it. The day after taking Kendall to the G. Young lab, I had done absolutely nothing. Once again passing on running with Emily, I had decided to become one with the couch today.

The house was currently Empty. Jon had taken a chunk of his day off work to meet Mom for a beach date, Kendall was somewhere with her friend Sara, and Griffin went out fishing with his gaggle of buddies.

I had been enjoying the silence after Lilia finished up her work and said goodbye. The quiet was something that I never seemed to get enough of now that I virtually wasn’t an only child anymore.

“Your face is dumb,” I attempted a comeback. Tommy sighed dramatically on the other end, I could practically see him shaking his head at me.

“You’re always so sharp and witty.” His voice was dripping with sarcasm. I clenched my eyes shut, wondering why he wouldn’t Man Up and go to the IMAX theater by himself. A group of people were meeting there to go see some new superhero movie, it was about a fifteen minute drive from Naples.

I knew the answer to that, though. There was no way Tommy would go to one of those things by himself. Really, they weren’t his friends anymore as much as they were Poot’s. Poot himself was unable to make it because of some family thing, which led to Tommy calling me as a second resort.

“Hey,” I grumped, pleased as a new retort successfully popped up in my mind. “How’s this for witty: Up Yours.”

The snort on the other end was unidentifiable, I wasn’t sure if it was a smothered laugh, an unimpressed chuckle, or if he just choked on his own spit.

“Seriously, if you’re going to be a baby and not drive yourself, I’ll pick you up and pay for the damn ticket,” Tommy carelessly said. I opened my eyes again, struggling to roll over to my stomach on the far-too-squishy couch. It was a good thing no one could see me right now.

“Really?” I asked. Since Poot couldn’t make it, it really would only have been the two of us. We had never been alone together during the day. Our “meetings” at night felt like part of a completely different life. I didn’t know how we’d mesh during the daylight hours.

“Yeah, I can be there in like, five minutes.”

I glanced at the clock, my lazy butt had been laying on the couch for the past two hours, completely vegging out.

“So, this is like a date. You’re picking me up and paying for my movie ticket,” I teased, waggling my eyebrows even though he couldn’t see me. But, by the extremely exaggerated, suggestive tone of my voice, Tommy caught on pretty quick.

And then he hung up on me.

“Huh,” I said to myself, looking down at the phone as a dial tone started vibrating through it. If that was all it took to get him to hang up, I should have done something like that at the very beginning of the conversation.

Rolling off the couch like some sort of spy, I gracelessly thudded to the ground and got to my feet. If he wasn’t completely put off by my last joke, I had five minutes to try and make myself not look like a girl who took pleasure in laying around all day.

Five minutes later, on the dot, Tommy pulled into my driveway. I guess I hadn’t scared him off.

It wasn’t until I grabbed my bag, walked out the door, and started walking toward Tommy’s car when I realized how nervous I was.

God, Calico. It’s not like it is a date. Get over yourself, I thought, swinging the door open. Tommy nodded a hello then waited until I was buckled before he swiftly pulled out from Jon’s house.

He was looking gorgeous, as always. His light chocolate hair was ruffled, sticking out here and there without a care. Opaque aviator sunglasses hid his misty eyes, sitting snugly on his straight nose. Wearing his well-loved grazy hoodie, it was zipped halfway up over a powder blue t-shirt. From where I sat, I could smell a light scent of cologne, like he had sprayed it on before hopping into his car.

I didn’t realize I was staring until he turned his head to look both ways before exiting the neighborhood, a jolt went through me at the thought of being caught eyeing him like that. Luckily, I was safe this time as he continued driving for a minute or so.

“Where are we going?” I asked, trying to turn my attention to something else as Tommy turned the opposite way of where we needed to go. He stared directly ahead, one hand on the wheel as the other rested comfortably on the armrest that separated the two seats. Maybe it was just him, but there was something sexy about seeing a guy drive.

“I need to go back to my house, I forgot my wallet,” he mumbled, glancing both ways again before making another left. We were still relatively close to the beach, but I had never seen these roads before.

“Oh.” Was the only word I came up with to add to the conversation. Tommy reached over and turned up the Mayday Parade CD that was playing. I was guessing it was an attempt to keep me from asking any more dumb questions.

I tried to ignore my awkward presence and look around the car. Tommy had a Jeep Grand Cherokee. It was a pretty big ride, but the trek was smooth and I felt like I was traveling in style. It was strange that a kid going into his senior year could already own such an expensive car. The thing probably cost a lot more than mine had.

When we reached a gated community, Tommy slid open his window and punched a number into a pad right on the curb. With a cheerful beep, the gates creaked and swung wide for our entrance.

Even after party-hopping from house to house in this swank community, I was still wide-eyed at the grandeur of each mansion. His neighborhood was like a series of ridiculously huge houses one right after another. There couldn’t possibly be any profession in this world that could help people afford houses like that.

Tommy’s house was no exception. As we pulled up his driveway, my mouth dropped open. It was huge brick masterpiece, towering masterfully over a spacious yard that not even children would dare to mess up.

He didn’t catch my wowed expression and parked the car in the front, winding driveway. The sound of his tongue clicking against the roof of his mouth sounded off while the car gracefully sighed as it was shut off.

“You can come in with me, it might take a minute for me to find my wallet. I can’t remember where I put it last...” He trailed off, getting out of his car without waiting for my reply. I unbuckled my seatbelt, eyes still glued to the massive house in front of me.

After I had gotten out, I had to jog to keep up with Tommy’s rushed, long strides. I found a little pleasure in the fact that I noticed he was trying to seem completely at east that I was getting into his house for the first time, but I kept my mouth shut.

We walked up the beautifully laid-out brick sidewalk, framed by large flowers and tropical plants. With one flick of his wrist, Tommy unlocked the gargantuan, white front door. Pulling it open, the gush of wind it created from its size flittered against my hair as the two of us stepped in.

Simply being allowed in his house felt extremely personal to me. I had a feeling that Tommy didn’t bring people back to his house as much as the normal teenager. As he removed his tennis shoes, still looking everywhere but at me, I took off my flip-flops and soaked in my surroundings.

The first thing I noticed was the absolute scarcity of color. Everything--the walls, the couches, paintings, tables--was dull shades of blue, green, gray and white. The bright color of their front yard practically jumped at me from the large set of front windows in the foyer. The house felt untouched: un-lived in.

Tommy started moving forward before I had a chance to catch my bearings. I stumbled after him, gazing at the stiff contemporary artwork that lined the walls.

“Thomas?”

He stopped dead in his tracks, foot still poised above the ground in a step. The air around him froze like his body as he slowly lowered it back to the floor. I ran clumsily into him, not paying attention to what was going on. He barely glanced back at me as I put my hands on his back to steady myself.

“Yeah?” Tommy called back, still unmoving in the small hall that separated the living room from the kitchen. I heard the heavy thump of feet against the floor until Tommy’s father came into view. “What are you doing home?”

It was probably because I had so many preconceptions about Mr. Rose before I met him, but there was a fresh punch of anxiousness that landed like a rock in my stomach. He was very tall, but I couldn’t tell if it was the memory of Tommy’s bruise or his actual look that made him loom in an intimidating sort of way.

Mr. Rose’s hair was the same color of Tommy’s. It was professionally relaxed across his head, like he was prepped to do a men’s shampoo commercial at any time. He was wearing the same kind of suit that Jon sported all the time, I could tell by the way his tie was slightly loosened that he was ready to relax for the day. Gripped in his thick fingers was a cell phone and a beeper, like he had just removed them from his belt: they looked fragile in his grasp.

Tommy wasn’t the same kind of build as his father, he was more willowy, though they had similar, strong shoulders. He looked like a small child in comparison to Mr. Rose.

“I finished a project early and-” That was when his dad noticed me, and a smile slid on to his face. I was sure he had intended it to be friendly, but it was a business-like, polite kind of motion that wasn’t very warm.

“Who’s this?” he asked in a deep voice, nodding his head toward me. Tommy looked behind himself like he had forgotten I was there in the first place.

“This is Calico McCandless.” Though the rest of him was still, I could see his fingers stressfully twitch at his sides.

Mr. Rose reached out a meaty hand. “Nice to meet you, Calico. I’m Thomas’ dad, Mr. Rose.” I timidly took his fingers in mine, trying to smile back. It wasn’t hard to tell that he wasn’t thrilled at my unannounced presence. Also, there was the depressing thought lingering in the back of my mind that he hit Tommy with the hand I was shaking. “And where did you get the name Calico from?”

I let go of him, then discreetly tucked my hands into the pockets of my shorts. The way he was looking at me made me feel like he was sizing me up, adding up the pieces and seeing if I came to whatever standards he had. “My mom worked at a fabric store when she was pregnant with me. She always liked the sound of calico, like the fabric print.”

“Ah, that’s interesting.” He said in a feinted, light tone that showed he actually didn’t think it was interesting at all. Tommy was carefully watching me, I did my best to ease my expression and be polite in the least. His dad turned to him. “There’s a Marlins game on soon, I’ve been trying to get a hold of you so we could watch it together since I’m home.”

Tommy’s face remained impeccably emotionless as he shook his head. “Sorry, I promised Calico I’d take her out tonight, we were planning it for a while.” I wasn’t sure why Tommy lied, but a warm feeling spread over my torso as he reached back and pulled my left hand out of my pocket, lacing his fingers with like we did it all the time. Mr. Rose looked at our entwined hands, then between the two of us as the sharp mechanics of his mind made their own deductions.

The mood around us became noticeably heavier.

“Take off your sunglasses when you talk to me, please. Where are you two going?”

“The movies.” Tommy obediently removed his sunglasses and hooked them on the front neck of his t-shirt.

“And you stopped home because...?

“I forgot my wallet.”

“I see.”

Their conversation was curt. Practiced. Well-mannered and respectful. Neither showed much emotion, though I was sure that the car salesman-like smile on Mr. Rose’s lips was there merely for my benefit. They continued their clipped sentences for another minute, then Mr. Rose stretched his neck.

“Fine. I’ll record it and we’ll watch it when you get home. Be back by eight, not a minute later.”

His son nodded, and I hoped he didn’t notice the way my palm was sweating against his. Mr. Rose momentarily looked Tommy up and down with a twinge of dislike. “You aren’t really wearing that out, are you?”

Tommy shifted where he stood, I could see the muscles in his jaw flex as he bit something back. “Yeah, Dad.”

“No way. Go change. What will people think of you wearing those rags around, Thomas?” There was a finality in the way his dad said it. All business, all the time. Tommy let out a controlled sigh, cautious not to disrupt the calm surface.

“Fine.” He tugged me after him as we swiftly walked past his dad. The trip up the stairs to his room was a blur, I stumbled as I tried to keep up. As soon as he shut the door behind us, he let go of my hand and I came to a staggering stop. Both of us stared at the floor, sharing a silence.

The encounter had been quick, but I still couldn’t shake off that feeling of unease that had filled me the moment I saw his dad. Again, it could have possibly been preconceived ideas about him, but just the way Tommy acted in front of his dad was enough for me to feel the tension between the two.

“Sorry,” Tommy apologized, sullenly walking to his closet and pulling out a button-up shirt. “He’s usually not home until much later.”

I found it within myself to shrug, trying to move my attention to something else. His room was nice, like an average boy’s. It was the one part of the house that actually seemed a little personal, like someone inhabited this space at one point in time. Though, it was clean in a way I hadn’t expected it to be--everything was exactly in its proper chunk of space.

Gulping, I walked to his bed and sat down on the bright red blanket that covered it. “It’s fine.”

Tommy placed his sunglasses on his dresser before unzipping his hoodie and swiftly pulling off his t-shirt, causing my mind to go airy at the sight of his smooth, muscular back. His confidence always astounded me.

I tore my eyes away from him as he looked down to button up the fresh shirt, hair falling into his misty eyes as he concentrated with a dull look. There were posters of soccer stars covering his walls, with a golfing or tennis one thrown haphazardly in there. A sleek computer rested in the corner, right next to the huge window that took up a good chunk of space on his wall.

“Do you guys watch baseball together a lot?” I asked in an attempt to pretend I wasn’t uncomfortable. He sniffed, checking himself in the mirror to make sure the buttons were straight.

“Yeah. I feel kind of bad about leaving him since he got home so early, but he’s just been in a bad mood lately, you know?” Though they were coming out normal, I could feel the practiced evenness of his words. “It’s the thing where it’s just better for us to be apart right now. Besides, I really want to see this movie.”

Through his reflection in the mirror, our eyes met in a jolted moment. He could clearly see the expression on my face, and embarrassedly looked the other way. Without having to say anything, he could tell I knew what was going on.

“Come on,” Tommy said, spotting his wallet on the floor by his dresser and putting it in the pocket of his khaki shorts. “Let’s get out of here.”

He didn’t look at me as we made our way back down the halls downstairs, where I could see his dad sitting on the couch, watching ESPN. He twisted around as we padded by.

“Calico!” I stopped at my name, inching back so that I could see Mr. Rose once more. “You have to come over and have dinner sometime.” He once again flashed me that plastic smile of his. Plastic. That was a good way to describe him, like some sort of formulated, life-sized Ken doll.

“Sure, thank you,” I replied when nothing else came to mind. Before I had a chance to say goodbye, Tommy grabbed my wrist and pulled me toward our shoes. After putting them on, the two of us practically jogged out the front door.

Tommy looked angry as he shut the door behind himself, placing his back against it as he ran his hand through his choppy hair. Eyes blazing, he shot them my way. With every breath he took, the fire in them died down as he continued to stare. Finally, once back to normal, he shook his head to himself and motioned for me to get in the car.

When we were back on the road, a sticky quiet was passing between us. Mr. Rose asking me to come over to dinner must have surprised Tommy, but I didn’t have the guts to bring it up as he was stone silent and looked at nothing but the traffic in front of us.

Clasping my hands firmly in my lap, I held my breath, waiting and waiting and waiting.

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