A Hard Headed Woman

Having dropped the girls back in California. It seemed everyone was put in their rightful place and I was back in Arizona with both Darren and John at my side.

“How long have we been gone from here?”
“A couple days maybe, don‘t worry, I left a note saying you went to California to see the girls,” John answers then handed me my cell phone.
“Thanks,” I mutter tiredly then looked at John, “Chester messed with Darren didn‘t he?”
“Yeah,” he replies, “I‘m sorry about all this.”
“Its fine,” I reply with a weak smile then gave him a hug, “Thanks for getting us back safely.”

John wrapped his arms around me and hugged back. I was so tired and I pulled away giving him another small smile.

“I‘ll see you around right?” I ask.
“Not for a little while, I‘ve got to see what‘s going on with the whole Chester thing,” John says kissing my forehead.
“Bye.”
“Bye.”

Darren and I stood in our apartment without much to say. I burst into tears right there. Everything that had happened, all that I had done and seen caught up with me. The whole ordeal with Darren wasn’t even him, Chester was behind it all; he fucked with my whole world and now that he was put away I could cry. Without saying anything just wrapped his arms around me and let me cry.

I wasn’t made of stone, after everything that happened I was overwhelmed; it was only a matter of time before I snapped and had a nervous breakdown. My sobs were what lulled me to sleep, as well as Darren rubbing my back gently. It was so much to take and when I snuggled under the covers and slept I felt myself wanting to go back to the very spot Aldo was waiting. I had no pleasant dreams and I woke up feeling like hell.

Needless to say the days turned to weeks and I had moved back in with Darren except, we were just roommates nothing more. I slept in the guest room we had and continued working at the bar. Life was sort of getting back on track for me, I’d think about Aldo and the Basterds sometimes but when I finally had to courage to watch the movie because I missed them that much. I realized the video was nowhere to be seen. I went onto net flix to download it but it didn’t exist only the old Inglorious Bastards that wasn’t like the others. It was like none of it happened, like my Basterds weren‘t real.

It was a Monday when the girls showed up at my doorstep. They planned a big road trip, it was summer break and semester was going to start for them soon so they wanted to go all out. I didn’t really have a say in the matter, I went because I missed them and wanted to be around people that knew I wasn’t out of my fucking mind. It was reassuring but hard to endure when one them would reminisce about our adventures. I don’t know it just struck a chord with me, I really missed those days. Missed Aldo a lot more that I thought I ever could miss someone.

From Arizona we drove cross country with our end point at the east coast of the States most likely in the Carolinas. For fun we’d stop at bizarre shops and places most have forgotten. Gwen took all the photographs she wanted to add to her portfolio. That was how Gwen and I met after all, we were in the same photo class when I went to UCLA. I took some pictures as well but just for fun and memory‘s sake.

Along the way we met some pretty interesting people, and sometimes Nora would call ahead so we could perform at some random bar for a bit of cash. Playing with the girls made me forget about all that was going on and to be honest that was something I needed. We were somewhere in Tennessee some small town and we checked into a small motel.

A small town’s nightlife isn’t the most exciting sometimes but there is always that one bar everyone hangs around. When you are in the South like we were, musical tastes were different, so we tended to do songs that inspired us by the south. Our favorite cover we did was “The Alabama Song.” After playing and having a great time at the small bar, we crashed at the motel.

Early next morning Gwen craved to do some exploring and picture taking. I was up early anyways so I got dressed in a white vintage bohemian mini dress that grazed a few inches above my knee with my brown cowboy boots. It took a bit longer for the others to get around so I just quickly curled a few strands of my wildly wavy hair to make it more put together. Finally we got our shit ready then headed on the road. Gwen had heard from some of the locals of a old house just a bit away from town. I just went with it as Gwen drove us through the empty road. It took some time to get there but soon an older white house with a big porch and old rusty ford truck in a nearby garage came into view.

“Told you it was cool,” Gwen says with a big smile. The others gave bright smiles as well but something told me this was a setup of some sorts.

“Did you call?” Paulie questions as we stood outside of the car looking at the house.
“Uh no,” Gwen hesitates to say. We all glared at her.
“Gwen this is shotgun country, we can‘t just show up an‘ expect to be welcomed,” I state.
“Shotgun country,” Nora laughs lightly.

“Yew ladies must be the ones who played at the bar,” a strong Southern accent says coming out of the house. A man in his mid thirties with dark brown hair and dark brown eyes. His smile was familiar though.

“Small town,” I smile politely.
“Thomas Raine,” he responds coming up and shaking my hand, “But yew ladies can call me Tom.”

My mouth went dry and my throat clenched so tightly I couldn’t even breath. I just stared at the man. He gave me a worried look.

“Are yew alright Miss? Yew look like yew‘ve seen a ghost,” Tom comments.
“She‘s okay, just a bit strung out, too much partying last night and the heat is getting to her,” Nora says shooting Tom a smile.
“Well come on in, we‘ll get ya a glass of water.”
Tom lead us into the house and I lagged behind giving the girls questioning looks. I found myself staring at the photos that were on the walls that we passed. Pictures of Aldo’s family were everywhere most were just of him and kids but none of a wife. He looked happy in the photos at least from what I could see. My fingertips grazed a photo of Aldo in his uniform.

“That‘s grandpa Aldo,” Tom says with a smile.
“Bet ya‘ll are proud to have a war hero for a grandpa,” I reply softly.
“Still are, he don‘ talk ‘bout the war much but I bet he‘d be real happy to see some pretty girls.”

My heart nearly stopped beating.

“Where‘s he at?” I found myself asking.
“Want to meet him?” Tom responds somewhat surprised.
“Yeah.”
“Well right this way Miss,” he replies with a rather genuine smile.

I followed Tom to another room and I seemed to blank out where the girls went. My eyes fell upon a white haired man sitting on a chair facing the window. His glasses were resting on the bridge of his nose and he wore a brown cardigan with khaki trousers. It took everything in my power not to rush to his side immediately.

“Gramps there‘s a pretty woman here that‘d like to meet yew,” Tom announces.
“Yew finally got yerself a girl Tom?” the familiar voice questions but as Aldo rose his gaze to us he seemed speechless.
“She ain‘t my girl, Gramps, not that I wouldn‘ mind, this is-- what did yew say yer name was again?”
“Amber,” I breathe out.
“Uh Tom mind showing us the backyard?” I heard Gwen ask.
“Will ya be alright in here?” Tom asks looking at me.
“Yeah, go ahead,” I answer mindlessly as I stared at Aldo.

Tom left the room and Aldo pushed his glasses closer to his face. Slowly I walked towards Aldo and sat in a chair next to his. Aldo raised his cold shaky hands to touch my face. His blue eyes showing immense emotion he finally spoke.

“Yer really here.”
“Yeah,” I say with a soft smile.
“Yew look the same as the night yew left me,” Aldo says still touching my face lightly.
“Well this the time I came from.”

“Yew probably don‘ wanna be seein‘ me so run down when yew look so beautiful still.”
“Don’t be crazy, I wanna be here,” I respond holding his hand in mine.
“Besides you were pretty rundown when I first met you anyways,” I smile at him.

“Always crackin‘ jokes,” Aldo smiles looking at me.
“Looks like you‘ve been livin‘ a good life,” I comment.
“As good as it‘d get without yew bein‘ there.”
“Tom‘s got yer smile.”
“That‘s what they say,” he says.
“I‘ve been missin‘ you,” I state as the tears welled up in my eyes.
“Yeah?”
“Yeah, a lot I‘ve been missin‘ you a lot,” I croak.
“I‘d be lyin‘ if I said I haven‘t been missin‘ yew,” Aldo responds.

I looked at Aldo with eyes clouded with tears.

“Yer young still Amber, how bout ya do what yew told me and live yourself a good life,” he continues.
“That night, I left and yew were right there just before I disappeared, I wanna know what yew wanted to say,” I counter.
“I wanted to say I love yew.”

I couldn’t handle it all, words could not describe how I felt so I let my actions do it. I gently pressed my lips onto his and kissed him briefly. Pulling away I gave him a weak smile.

“Just know the feeling’s mutual,” I say softly. Aldo smiled at me.

“Hate to kick ya’ll out but I gotta get Gramps to the doctor for his appointment,” Tom says appearing at the door, “But like I was telling the girls ya’ll are welcome to come back tomorrow for some lunch.”
“I‘d like that very much,” I reply with smile.
“Yew two have a good talk?” Tom asks looking at Aldo and I since we were still holding hands.
“Ya best be takin‘ good care of Aldo here, he‘s something special,” I state finally letting go of Aldo’s hand.
“I will Miss. See yew tomorrow afternoon.”
“See ya tomorrow.”

I left begrudgingly, not really wanting to leave Aldo’s side. On the ride back to the motel I couldn’t help but smile a bit more. I felt more complete. The girls noticed how much happier I looked.

“Thank you for this,” I say softly to them.
“You‘re our friend we do what we can to make you happy,” Paulie smiles.
“I couldn‘t ask for better friends.”
“Aw now look who‘s getting all after school special on us,” Nora teases lightly. I let out a chuckle feeling happy in the moment.

We arrived at the motel and did a little more exploring in town. I was a bit giddy about having lunch the next day and felt the need to get something pretty to wear. By nighttime I had a new dress, it was a deep purple with ¾ sleeves and a bell shape flair to the skirt. I went to bed wanting to get some rest for the day to come and look my personal best for Aldo.

It seemed like not even a couple hours passed with me sleeping that I was woken up by Paulie.

“Hmm, what is it Paulie?” I say tiredly.
“Rose, Tom called,” she starts to say but she stopped. I looked at her shaking my head as the tears welled up in my eyes.
“Please, please don‘t say it,” I croak.
“I‘m so sorry,” Paulie says looking at me, “Aldo passed away last night honey.”
“No,” I cry.

The tears fell freely from my eyes like a running faucet of water. Sobs of anguish escaped my mouth and I kept repeating the same word no, over and over again. My hands covered my face and I couldn’t stop crying. It felt like a stampede of elephants were crushing my chest. Paulie tried to soothe my sobs by rubbing my back gently as I cried but it didn’t help.

“I didn‘t get enough time with him,” I whisper sadly as the tears continued to fall.
“We know Rosie.”

“Fuckin‘ Chester won, he‘s makin‘ me hurt worse than I‘ve ever hurt and he didn‘t even have to beat me up, he just made me met Aldo and I fell for him.”

“I‘m so sorry,” Gwen says looking at me with sad eyes.

I couldn’t stop crying, my tears were endless, and my whole body shook. Aldo was dead, he was dead and I couldn’t do a damn thing about it. Now I was left in a catatonic state of despair. I didn’t move from the hotel bed just opted to stay there trying to sleep the nightmare of his departure away.

I was woken up two days later early in the morning by Gwen, Nora and Paulie.

“Get up, you‘re going to shower and get dressed, Aldo‘s funeral is today.”

I opened my mouth to say something but I knew it was futile. So I got out of bed feeling weak and locked myself in the bathroom. Upon looking myself in the mirror, I was shocked to see just how terrible I looked. It was as if I aged ten years in the passed two days. Bags lied just underneath my lifeless eyes and my hair laid flat on my head looking dull. A sigh escaped my lips and I turned the hot water on. In the shower I let the tears mix with the boiling hot water.

Once out of the shower I got dressed in the dark purple dress I was planning to wear to see Aldo for lunch. Slipping on a pair of ballet flats and pulling my hair back into a slick ponytail I was ready to leave. The girls were ready and we piled into the car with all of our things packed in then headed to the town cemetery where Aldo was to be buried.

Tom along about twenty or thirty other people were already there all wearing black. The priest spoke next to the closed coffin that had an American flag draped across it. My heart clenched and I felt both my hands be held by Nora and Paulie as I stared at the coffin. Before I knew it they were lowering the coffin into the earth. People began to disburse but I stood staring in the same spot until Paulie gave my hand a squeeze. I looked at her and just nodded in understanding, it was time to go.

“He was real happy seein’ yew,” Tom comments catching up with us as we were walking away.
“I was happy to see him as well,” I reply weakly.
“Yew know, kinda funny he used to tell me stories about four girls that came into his ranks durin’ the war that he fell in love wit one that had eyes that were like swampy waters and a smile that even had the most sour of men smiling back,” Tom rambles then looks me right in the eyes, “Am I crazy to say I think yer that girl?”

“It was lovely meetin‘ you,” I respond with a weak smile.

The girls knew if I stayed any longer I’d break down and we left the small town. They argued saying they’d drive home but I told them we could drive to the coast, that we were on a mission. It took a couple days to get to the coast but we managed to get there.

The weather was overcast as I stared out at the vast dark blue ocean that lied in front of me. Sitting on the ground I rested my chin on my knees looking out to the sea whose color reminded me of Aldo’s blue eyes.

“Don‘ worry about a thing,” I start to sing softly.
“Cause every little thing is gonna be alright,” Gwen finishes.

Soon we were all singing Three Little Birds by Bob Marley. It was one of those moments that were so real and reassuring. Here I was, my feet buried in the sand with company I could never buy with a million bucks. I had to live myself a good life, Aldo did it for me so I was going to do it for him.

I was going to get my life in order, get a real job, get my own place and make something of myself. No more being scared, I had to live myself a good life.