We'll Lose Ourselves in This Masquerade

“Be careful,” her mother whispered in her ear as she hugged her only daughter at Platform 9¾.

“I will,” Danica promised quietly. They were going back, the summer finally over. Both Draco and Danica could not wait to get on that train, even though it would mean the end of their show of relationship. Only their mothers had come to bid them goodbye. Their fathers had been too busy on missions for the Dark Lord. Neither of them knew what it entailed really, only that it was of the utmost importance.

She let go and Narcissa hugged her as her own mother hugged Draco. This show of affection was so odd for Pureblood families, even from the mother, but times were changing. These were dangerous times. Who knew what would happen, or when the last time together was. Narcissa squeezed her tightly. “Watch out for each other,” she told her one-day-to-be-daughter-in-law.

“We will, Narcissa,” she promised. “You know neither of us would ever let anything happen to the other.”

Draco nodded, offering his arm to Danica, which she gladly took. “We’ll be off then, Mother, Delphine.”

“Write to us,” Narcissa said quickly as they turned to go. They nodded and walked off quickly, both eager to get on the train.

“Well I, for one, am certainly glad the wretched summer is finally over,” Draco said as they boarded.

“Me too,” she sighed in relief. They had spent most of the summer absolutely terrified and alone together.

He gestured for her to go first, like the gentleman he always was with her. She fidgeted awkwardly. “Um, sorry, Drake, but I said I’d go meet Neville.”

That made him stand straight. “Oh um right. And where shall I say you went off to?”

She understood the loaded question. Crabbe and Goyle could not know the two had split. They wouldn’t notice anything at school really, both being the two daftest people alive, besides Weasley, but here on the train where it was more secluded, where it was always the same, where she always sat with them in their compartment, it would warrant some suspicion even from the dense goons. “Um, tell them I was caught up by the insufferable Hermione Granger who just insisted she talk to me.”

Draco’s eyes tensed. “And are you going to talk to the know-it-all?”

She sighed, shrugging. She had debating it with herself all summer. She had ignored the many posts Granger had sent her over the summer, save for the last one in which she had replied she’d talk to her on the train. “I suppose.”

Draco hugged her lightly. “I’ll see you then.”

She nodded and turned to go in search of Neville. Before she found him, someone grabbed her arm and pulled her into a compartment. Instinctively, she pulled out her wand. She lowered it when she saw it was Granger. “What the bloody fuck, Granger?”

“Calm down, Shardae,” Weasley said, and once again Danica raised her wand.

“What is this?” she looked accusingly at Hermione. Were they going to ambush her, possibly hurt her? Maybe for information? No, they couldn’t. They were bloody Gryffindors, through and through. They would not stoop to those levels.

“I just want to talk to you,” Hermione said quietly.

“And Potter and Weasley are here why?” she rolled her eyes. “For moral support?”

“No, we were all just sitting here,” Hermione said quickly. “They can leave.”

“What?” Weasley demanded.

Potter sighed, obviously rational about this. He stood and tugged on Weasley’s sleeve. “Come on, let’s go see if the food trolley is out yet.”

Potter stopped in front of her for a moment. “Hermione is sorry. She never meant to hurt you. She’s a good person, and you’re lucky to be able to count her as a friend. Don’t ruin that.” The threat was evident in his voice, as was the disdain. He obviously did not understand why Hermione wanted so badly for Danica to forgive her, but he put up with it because of their friendship. She wondered if she had any friends as loyal. Maybe she should befriend a Hufflepuff…

She waited silently until the compartment door shut behind them. “Look, Granger--.”

“No, wait, first let me say this,” Hermione cut her off. “I know I should have told you. I know I wasn’t a very good friend. But I had a reason for it. I was not sure if you’d believe me, since it was Draco, and I knew how close you two were, and I didn’t want to lose you as a friend. I’m not saying the reason is justifiable, I know I made a mistake. But I am so sorry, Danica, I really am. And I know my selfishness to have you as a friend may be the reason I lose you anyway, but I really hope not, because you are important to me.”

Danica smirked. “The best friend of the boy who lived apologizing and proclaiming her friendship to the daughter of a --,” she stopped, having said too much.

Hermione’s eyes widened. Of course, the person Danica slipped up to had to be the smartest witch of their bloody age. “I know what’s coming,” she said quietly. “And I know where we both stand. But I don’t think we should have to stop being friends right now for it.”

Danica nodded slowly, having caught her words. They all knew the war was coming, and when it did, they would be standing on opposite sides, and when it did come finally, they could no longer look at each other as friends. But until then, until the moment they would have to face each other in battle, their friendship could remain. Danica could not fault her for that, since just as Hermione would cast a fatal blow to protect Potter or Weasley, Danica would cast one to protect Draco. Still, right now, in the eerie calm before the storm, there was no reason why they could not be friends. “You know if his life is threatened, I will have to stop you however I can,” she said quietly.

“Which he?” Hermione retorted.

The question was clear. When it came down to it, which would she protect first? She had realized her feelings for Neville, but the ones instilled in her from birth for Draco still loomed in her heart. Even now when she made her decision of who she wanted to be with, she was still faced with the same dilemma, Neville or Draco? To protect Neville, would she go against everyone knew loved, everything she knew? To protect Draco would she risk hurting Neville? She did not know the answer to either of those questions and she prayed she would never truly be faced with it. For now, she cryptically said, “Both.”