Shattered Secrets

Brian followed me into the house and grinned widely when Bronx ran up to him screaming with joy. It was some makeshift kind of homecoming and it looked right. Like Bronx was supposed to be in love with the idea of Brian coming home to him, and Brian was supposed to be here, playing house with us instead of with his wife.

Mandi and I stood side by side near the door and watched. I hadn't made Brian promise to leave his wife or move out or even fight us into his existing life. It was the other way around, I knew that. We were a place for him to get what he couldn't out of his other life. Mandi didn't say anything about it, and neither did I. Both of us were just relieved that I'd caved and led Brian back into my life by the hand, after only two and a half days.

As Mandi and I walked over, Brian and Bronx had progressed to messing around on the couch. Bronx was attempting to climb onto Bri's back as Brian laughed loudly and reached to make sure the little boy wouldn't fall onto the floor.

Amanda cleared her throat, pulling Brian away from playing around with Bronx. Brian pulled the little boy off of him and turned to look at Mandi and I with a genuine smile. He stood back up and Bronx stood directly in front of him, smiling proudly with Brian's hands on his shoulders.

"Hey, Syn," Mandi greeted, waving slightly with a smirk on her face.

Brian grinned even wider, his fingers absentmindedly running through Bronx's hair. "Hey Amanda. How've you been?" he asked politely, looking across to her.

"Better now that you're here. I've been to incredibly busy sorting through my best friend's love triangle to even think about myself." Mandi shrugged, revealing to Brian that I had told her everything.

Brian looked to me, studying me to make sure. Then, after I nodded slightly, he let a nervous smile overtake his features. "Oh, yeah," he said, "Sorry about that."

I leaned forward and grabbed Bronx's wrist so that I could pull him away from the guitarist. He crossed the divide without any reluctance and stood in front of me, looking at the musician silently. I leaned down and whispered in his ear, asking him if he would go upstairs and play for awhile so the three of us could talk.

Mandi seemed to feel the unspoken things between Brian and I and she followed my son upstairs without a word. Brian and I stood across from each other quietly until the little boy's bedroom door slammed shut at the top of the stairs.

"How have you been?" I asked as I stepped around him and sat down on the far end of the couch.

He sat down next to me. "I've been fine. Better now though."

I pressed my lips together and nodded. "Good, I'm glad," I said, brushing my bangs back as I turned and looked at him.

Brian looked at me too and I could him getting closer. I hadn't forgotten the words he said outside and I wasn't about to stop myself from kissing him. Things were still a mess, but I cared about him more than I cared to admit to myself. But he'd had no problem saying it at all.

I made a noise against his mouth and pulled away, opening my eyes as his dark ones landed on me. I brushed my thumb over his bottom lip and sat back, definitely stopping anything from continuing.

"What?" he asked, nervousness evident as he searched my face for more doubts.

"I have to get dinner out of the oven..." I answered, detangling myself from Brian reluctantly. We both knew it wasn't the real and complete answer, but he went with it.

Brian nodded and sat back from me as I got up and stepped around him.

"What are you doing?" I questioned Amanda as soon as she and Bronx came running into the kitchen and jumped up on the chairs. Brian was sitting on the island, watching me as I cooked for everyone. We'd been talking about everything that wasn't important, but neither of us wanted to stray away from safe topics. "Get off the table," I demanded, my heart jumping into my throat when my son climbed up to stand on the top if it.

Brian slid off the island and pulled the boy down. Bronx sent me a look of defeat and crossed his arms when his toes hit the ground. Mandi hopped down with ease. "We were playing lava monster," she explained.

I glared a the grown woman but didn't reply.

A little while later, later the four of us were seated at the kitchen table eating chicken, mashed potatoes and drinking root beer. Brian sat next to me, Bronx across from him and Amanda sat across from me.
After dinner Bri and Bronx raced around the living room some more playing with every toy that Bronx could find and tossing them on the floor when they got bored with the thing.

Mandi left around 7:30 claiming that she had to babysit her sister's kids tonight while she and her husband went out. "You know," she murmured before she left, "I could take Bronx with me tonight. If you want." It was a suggestion so that Brian and I could be alone together, but we both knew it wasn't as simply as that.

I smiled gratefully but shook my head. "It's better if he's here," I answered, wrapping my arms around her shoulders, "but thank you."

Mandi let me alone with the boys and as she walked away, I watched her glance back, obviously wondering if she'd see any of the guys again.

I smiled and waved from the doorway before I slammed the door shut behind me. I turned to see Brian and Bronx sitting on the wood floor with toy Transformers riding on little magnetic trains on a track that had been set up across the living room.

Neither of them noticed me watching them for they were too caught up in their own little world. Bronx quoted Spongebob, making a rainbow with his hands and saying 'imagination'. Brian laughed softly, reaching out to straighten his hat that sat on Bronx's head, covering his fallen light blonde hair.

Brian sat cross-legged across from Bronx, fiddling with the plastic Thomas train and connecting it with another piece of the set. He held it up to show Bronx, who nodded and showed Brian his own. I leaned against the wall, watching the two interact with a smile on my face.

I clock above the T.V told me, again, that it was getting late, and even though I didn't want to pull Bronx away from Brian or vice versa, Bronx needed his bath and Brian and I needed to talk.

"Babes?" I called, smiling despite myself as both of them looked up to me.

"What. Mommy?" Bronx questioned, watching as his toy train slid down one of the ramps.

"Time for a bath," I stated walking forward. Bronx groaned loudly and shook his head.

Brian stretched and stood up. "Come on, little man," Brian murmured and picked Bronx of before the little boy had a chance to run off. Bronx huffed as Brian walked over to me. I reached to take Bronx out of Brian's arms but Brian decided that he'd carry the young boy up the stairs for me.

I grinned and led him up into the bathroom. He dumped Bronx onto the floor and I ushered Bri out of the room quickly and shut the door behind us.

I held the door shut as Brian and I stood in the hallway. Bronx yelled on the other side and smacked the door again and again as I faced Bri, needing this moment. "Are you gonna hang around or...?" I questioned, grimacing as Bronx continued to pound on the wooden door.

Brian nodded uncertainly. "I'll wait downstairs." He turned and I watched as he disappeared down the wooden steps. He was wearing a purple shirt that cut off at the sleeves with dark wash jeans. He was only clad in socks as he wandered away and I watched him go, my thoughts ravaging my mind.

I counted to three out loud and then pushed the door open quickly and carefully as to not knock into Bronx. I shut the door behind me and began stripping Bronx of his clothes with out a word.

I tossed him into the bathtub, Brian's hat laying deserted on the bathroom floor. We washed his hair, doused him in body wash and scrubbed all the germs off of his little body. And thirty minutes later I was wrapping Bronx up in a fluffy blue towel and carrying him into his bedroom so that I could help him get his pajamas on.

We shuffled him into his favorite baggy pajama pants and white tank before I set him down at the little desk in his bedroom to do his work, claiming that Brian was going to be gone before he was done. The young boy shouted out for the older man to to 'save him'.

Bri appeared in the doorway, leaning against the door frame with his hands in his pockets. As I brushed by him, I quietly told him to say goodbye to my son. Bronx threw himself out of his spot, complaining that he wanted to play with Brian instead, but I put him back in his chair and put his homework folder down in front of him. He whined, but got to work.

"Call me when you're done," I said, lingering in his doorway, "I'll be downstairs, alright, babes?"

Brian and I went downstairs and we could hear my son muttering to himself. A little while later Bronx was done and yawning at the top of the stairs. I didn't move from my spot. "If you're tired, babe, you should go to bed."

"I'm not tired Mommy," he protested, hopping down the stairs while trying to stifle another yawn.

"You sure?" I questioned as I heaved myself up from the couch, leaving Brian alone as I tried to shuffle my boy back up the stairs.

"Yup," he reassured, grinning as he darted around me and over to Brian. He smiled cheekily back at me as he leaned onto the couch next to Brian. He turned to the guitarist, about to start a conversation.

"I think you should go to bed, little man," Brian told him as Bronx shuffled on to the couch next to him and plopped down against him.

"I'm not tired," Bronx said, ignoring the connotation.

"But you will be when you get into bed," Brian disagreed, shifting the older into his lap so he could pick him up as he stood up.

"No I won't," Bronx answered, shifting in Brian's arms so that he was facing right way up.

I sent Brian a looked that suggested Bronx's refusal and the guitarist just grinned and slid past me. He took the stairs two at the time and I followed them into Bronx's bedroom. Brian literally tossed the little boy down onto his bed and then he followed, smiling as Bronx giggled and tried to move quickly out of the way.

"How about we play a game?" Brian suggested, running his fingers through the little kids hair.

"What kind of game?" Bronx inquired quietly, resting his head on his pillow, subconsciously.

"I say something and you say the first word that comes into your mind," Brian explained as I sat down at Bronx's desk chair and watched the two of them together. Brian stretched out on the little boy's bed and Bronx laid on his shoulder. They were facing the ceiling as they spoke to each other.

"Farm."
"Piggy."

"Cow."
"Moo."

"School."
"Bad."

"Sleep."
"Tired."

They did that until Bronx started to zone out. Their game didn't take much thought and Bronx drifted quickly. I moved to Bronx's side as he fell asleep and whispered my goodnights to him as Brian slowly crept out of his bed, trying his hardest to get up without waking him.

He stumbled as his ankle caught in the blankets and then stifled his laughter when he caught his balance. He grinned back at me and pulled his jeans up higher on his hips. I covered my son up and walked beside Brian out of his room, my fingers on the small of his back.