I'm a Fake

I felt a warm hand on my back but I didn’t look to see who it was. Whoever it was started to rub my back.

“Are you ok?” It was Frank.

“Don’t worry about it,” I mumbled.

“Why?” he asked.

“Because,” I said. “I’m not ok and I deserve to feel like this.”

“And how do you feel?” asked Frank.

“You sound like a psychiatrist,” I said flatly.

“Just answer me,” he said. I lifted my head from the bed and looked at Frank.

“I feel like shit,” I said, frowning. Frank nodded.

“Same here,” said Frank. I put my face back down onto Frank’s pillow.

“I’m really sorry,” I said into the pillow.

“I know,” said Frank. “I’m just not ready to accept that yet. But, can I ask you something?”

“Whatever you want,” I said.

“Why’d you do that to me?” asked Frank. I could now hear the hurt in his voice. I sat up, wiping my eyes, and looked at Frank.

“Well, you know how I hated you?” I asked. Frank nodded. “Well, when I came here, I kept telling myself that I hated you. Then I got the idea to start going out with you and then when the moment came, to hurt you. That’s when I figured that the best way to do that would be by cheating on you. What I didn’t think about was that it would have other repercussions like wrecking yours and Gerard’s friendship. And also I didn’t realize till after I hurt you that I didn’t hate you. I loved you. I still love you actually.”

Frank just stared at me. I wondered what he was going to say. But he didn’t say anything. He didn’t do anything actually…except turn and leave his room, leaving me alone in his room again.