The Adventures of Gerard Way Vs. Soulja Boy

It all started on a completely normal day on the My Chemical Romance tour bus... well, as normal as you could get on said bus. Mikey was back in the bunks, talking to Alicia on his cell phone, Gerard was glued to the television and Bob was listening to Frank and Ray have a rather heated discussion involving Star Wars.

"I'm just saying, if Darth Vader was so powerful," Frank said, punctuating his words by waving his hands in the air, "then he would have known Palpatine was lying and Jedi mind killed his ass with Force lightning!"

"Okay first of all, he was a Sith, not a Jedi," Ray sighed, not for the first time in the conversation. "and second of all, Palpatine was the most powerful Sith in the entire galaxy, so he could have squashed Darth Vader like a bug!"

"You two are such nerds," Gerard laughed from his spot on the couch.

"Ha! This coming from the person who has a fetish for Wonder Woman," Frank retorted,

"I do not have a fetish for Wonder Woman."

"He's not lying, Frank, "Mikey chimed in, having ended his phone call. "It's actually Catwoman." Gerard turned five different shades of red as Mikey continued to talk. "He said that her leather suit really turned him on."

"No I didn't!" Gerard protested, looking down as his feet rather guiltily. Mikey couldn't help but smirk, having claimed a rare victory over his brother.

"Oh Gee, it's alright to be embarrassed once in awhile."

"Oh Mikey," Gerard said, having finally thought of a comeback, "should I tell the guys about the X-Men comic?" Mikey visibly paled.

"You said you'd never bring that up again," he whispered.

"Gerard, do tell," Frank said, infusing his voice with an awful imitation of a British accent. He plunked onto the floor and looked up, expression matching that of an excited child.

"Well, when I was eighteen or so, I was looking for one of my comics so I wandered into his room." He jerked a thumb at Mikey, who was now pure white, "and, sure enough, there my comic was, with a huge white stain on-"

"Shut up, shut up, shut up!" Mikey yelled, pouncing and clamping his hand over Gerard's mouth. Gerard merely giggled and easily wrenched his head away, bounding towards the bunks.

"It was on Magneto!" he shrieked. Frank, Bob and Ray burst into hysterical laughter while Mikey, who was now bright red, took off after his brother.

"Gerard, you're an asshole!" he yelled, jumping into his brother's bunk and attempting to savagely beat him with his fists.

"You may use your hands on a daily basis, but I use my mouth!" With that, Gerard sunk his teeth into Mikey's shoulder, making him squeal like a little girl.

"That sounds naughty," Frank giggled, nearly in tears from laughing so hard.

"Shut up!" both Way brothers shouted at the same time, poking their heads out of the curtain of the bunk. At that moment, the bus suddenly stopped cold, sending both toppling with a thud to the hard floor.

"Are we stopping to eat?" Ray called up to their driver.

"No... you guys might want to come see this." Curious, all five band members went up to the front part of the bus and gazed out the windshield.

"What the fuck?" Frank whispered, brushing his hair out of his eyes to make sure he was seeing what he thought he was seeing. The entire street was blocked by people of all ages, races, genders, shapes, sizes and any other defining trait one could think of. Every single one of these people were dancing to some music the band could only faintly hear.

"What the hell is that dance?" Gerard asked, having the same incredulous look as everyone else.

"I have no idea," Bob said, "but it's really dumb." By the looks of things, the entire dance consisted of dancing to the left, cranking your hands like a motorcycle, repeating the same move to the right and then jumping outwards like Superman.

"It looks like drunk Frank attempting to be a ballerina," Mikey commented. This remark would usually of gotten him a smack but Frank was too busy staring at the mass of people.

"Roll the window down," Ray said. "I want to hear what they're dancing to." The driver did so and the song drifted into their ears.

Soulja boy up in this OH!
Watch me crank, then watch me roll!
Watch me crank that Soulja boy
Then supaman that ho
Now watch me youuuuu!

"What the fuck is that?" Gerard asked.

"It's like nothing I've ever heard," Bob whispered.

"Kind of catchy," Frank said, swaying his hips back and forth.

"Frank, please stop grinding against me."

"Oops, sorry Gerard." They continued to stare at the massive crowd, completely awestruck.

"How are we going to get by?" The driver responded by honking his horn and, almost immediately, the crowed parted, still dancing as the bus slowly advanced. The people went on and on as far as the eye could see.

"Jesus, look at them all," Mikey said.

"Truly impressive," Bob admitted, heading back to the main area. Ray followed soon after.

"I hate it. I hate that song," Gerard muttered, one eye twitching suspiciously.

"But Gee, it's so catchy," Frank whined, swaying his hips again.

"Frank!"

"Sorry!" Gerard and Frank both left, leaving only Mikey still listening to the song. He'd never heard anything quite like it. It seemed like it had wriggled into his skull, replacing all other thoughts. He only returned to the main area after they'd passed the crowd and the song was only playing in his head. The entire way to their destination, the Miami stop of Warped Tour, his foot spontaneously tapped the rhythm of the song. At one point, when the others had started a game of poker, he picked up his bass and made an attempt to play it.

"I win! Suck it Frank!" Bob yelled, slamming his cards down onto the table and making the room shake.

"Fine." Without warning, Frank pulled his shirt and tossed it behind him into the bunks.

"Uh, Frank... we weren't playing strip poker," Gerard reminded him, sighing heavily.

"We weren't?" Everyone groaned loudly, with Bob slamming his head onto the table. Mikey heard none of this. He simply sat there, staring absently at the ceiling, singing Crank That in his head.

"Soulja boy up in this oh..."