This Must be Fiction

My throat clenched and I understood what Ville was asking me. Was I ready to drink human blood? I ran my fingers across my stomach and thought about what I had to do. My throat was so dry I thought it might completely shut if I didn't do something. Is that what being hungry felt like as a vampire?

"Well, Bam and I got someone for you. He was recently in prison and we broke him out. Just so we didn't have someone completely innocent for your first meal. It's ok to drain him, we've all done it." Ville's hands ran up and down my arms.

"I don't think I can drain someone... How do I stop before it goes too far? And how do I not like... give him my venom?" I asked.

"It takes a lot of will power. Mostly you just have to remember that there is a human life in your power, and you have the choice of whether to kill him or not. Keep that thought in mind, and he might live. But if it gets to be too much for you, Bam and I are here to help." Ville's smile was strangely bright.

"Ok... I uh.. think I'm ready." I said, my legs trembling as the thought of what was about to happen sank in. My mind was processing facts faster than before and it made sense now. I knew what I had to do. I just had to hold strong, and remember that a human life was in my hands. It couldn't be too hard.

Ville tugged my hand and led me into the living room where the smell instantly hit me. It was terrible and amazing all at once. I cringed from the iron smell but lunged towards aroma that tightened my throat even more. Ville held my arms back so that I would not attack the man asleep on the couch.

"Oh God it smells so..." I rushed a hand to my throat to make sure that it was still there. I wrinkled my nose and got into a running position all at once, and all automatically.

"Strange. It's not good. But that's just this particular gentleman. Most people tend to smell less like iron and more... desirable."
Ville let go of my shoulders and I sprinted towards the man. My teeth sank into his neck like a knife into warm butter, and I started chugging in his blood. It tasted like blood, but it refreshed me in a way that I had never experienced before. The muscles in my throat instantly felt slick and moistened. No liquid could compare to the feeling of blood. Nothing in the world could be this amazing.

"Molly!" I heard Ville shout from behind me. I knew the man underneath me must be nearly half-empty. But it was so delicious. So amazing. So thirst-quenching. I didn't want to stop. I would kill him. I didn't care.

Ville's arms wrapped around my middle. "Molly, stop! Do you want to kill him? Or do you want me to stop you?"

I wanted to stop. Dear God, what was I doing? Still drinking, still killing this man. I didn't want him to die, but I didn't want to stop. I was too thirsty.
I could only nod to respond to Ville's question. Ville yanked my middle, hard, and we flew backwards into the wall. I felt a growl form in the bottom of my throat and eventually come into fruition so that the entire room was silenced by the roar that I had created. Bam came into view and I saw him licking the puncture wounds that I had created. He picked up the bloody mess and ran for the door, locking it behind him.

I was panting and struggling against Ville's arms.
"He's gone, you have to calm down. You can't have him back. Tomorrow we'll try again."

"Ahh!" I groaned, standing, still in Ville's arms. I looked down at my hands and noticed the blood dripping onto them. I licked them clean.
Ville looked at the bloody mess that I had created and chuckled.

"It does get cleaner over time." He rubbed the back of his head and looked at the stain on the couch.

"I'm sorry." I muttered with pure shame brewing in my core.

"You did great! I could feel what you were going through and just the fact that you wanted to stop is an amazing sign. Most newborns don't care at all if a person lives or dies. The real test is going to be you around a live human. That is, one who is not unconscious."

"It didn't feel great. It felt like I wanted to drain him until there was nothing left." I groaned once more and continued licking my lips, getting all of the remaining blood from my face. Ville leaned down and licked my chin, sending a sensation into my middle that I had never felt before. I held my hands up.

"Hold up on all the licking, will you? I'm not sure I can handle that." I wiped my face with my hands and continued cleaning up the remaining blood. "This feels so wrong." I whispered.

"It isn't wrong, it's what you are now. You never have to kill anyone. And as long as I'm here, you never will. It will get easier, I can't tell you that enough. It will not always be this hard."

"I'm not sure that I believe you." I said honestly, not really knowing if these feelings would fade.

"Would I ever lie to you?"

"No, of course not. Just... every-thing's so real now. I didn't fully understand it before. But I'm an entirely new person.. and I don't know." I looked down at my hands. Ville's larger hand covered both of mine as he whispered.

"And yeah, it's really confusing. But I'm here for all of your questions and everything that feels strange. I'll walk you through everything."

"How did you do this all by yourself?" I asked with wide eyes. It seemed impossible for
anyone to make this transition alone.

"Honestly, I don't know. It's not as bad as it seems. In a few hours, even, you'll feel more normal."
The door swung open and shut as an irritated Bam stormed in.

"That was good. Messy, but good." He said with a stern voice.

"What's with the voice?" I asked. He put his hands on his hips and looked at me with a straight face.

"You look good. Really good. One of the best changes that I've seen in a while." He paused as his eyes roamed my body. "Anyway. I got word from Linde and he said that Jonna was seen around Helsinki today. So we have that bit of information."

"So she's not on her way here?" I asked, hopeful.

"Not yet. But that only means that she's planning something. She wouldn't take her time if she wasn't thinking of something completely destructive."
A silence followed. It would be ok, I thought, I was a vampire already. I could defend myself.

"She's been changed though, there's that." Ville added, reading my mind.

"Jonna will plan for that."
Shit. Bam was right. Now we had no idea if Jonna was one step ahead or behind us.

"So I can be prepared for when she gets here. I'm stronger now. There's that too." I added, still looking down at my hands where there was blood stained on my skin.

"Right... right.." Bam began pacing and was obviously thinking very deeply. "Well, listen, I'll get out of your guys' hair for a bit and you can start getting adapted to being a vampire. I'll check back in either later or tomorrow." Bam walked out the door without another word.
Ville and I looked at each other.

"Darling, you're a mess. A shower is probably in order." Ville said with a slight smile. The intense feeling of affection had yet to lessen.

"Ok. I said meekly. We walked together into the bathroom where Ville started the water for me. I had no idea what temperature would suit my new core temperature, so I let him take care of that for me.

I stripped down and got naked. It felt a bit weird to be doing so, but I had to look at my new body in the mirror. It was definitely different than before. Muscles protruded in all the right spots, and my thin anorexic frame had completely disappeared. My curves had filled out too, for some reason, and my skin was completely clear of all blemishes and scares. Except for the lone tattoo on my hip, there was nothing similar about my old body and my new one.

"Once again, I must remind you that you have not changed that much, but your new eyes are still adjusting." Ville's hands wrapped around my hips and turned me to face him. He had gotten undressed as well. My knees buckled and luckily Ville was there to hold me up. "What?" He asked, which he didn't have to. I knew that he felt the extreme sexuality coursing through my veins.

"Put your clothes on." I said, taking a step away from him. "I don't think I could handle that right now." I covered my eyes with his hands. I heard his boxers snap around his waist and I uncovered my face.

"Still too much for you eh?" He joked, taking a step closer to me.

"I promise once everything feels normal, that we'll have amazing mind blowing sex. But for right now... I don't think so."

"Amazing, mind blowing sex. I can live with that." Ville smirked and leaned down, planting a small kiss on my neck.

"I have a question..." I began thinking of something that had no occurred to me before. "Is sex with vampires different than sex with humans?"

"Definitely. More powerful, lustful. Vampires are creatures built on higher senses. Everything feels more intense and extreme. I've actually been holding myself back. Mostly because I would crush your human body if I even attempted to make love to you like I'd like to." He said while dragging his nails down my rib cage. "But despite the fact that vampire sex is more intense, sex with you has been more amazing than anything I've ever had, despite being different species at the time."

"How come?" My voice was shaky, even with it's new sound.

"Because we're blood-mates. I thought you would have figured that out. Two creatures meant to be together obviously are going to create some kind of beauty with their bodies."

"That makes sense, I think." I said, taking a step away from Ville in order to make sure that my stomach would not come out through my throat. "So even though I was a human, sex with me was better than it ever was with Jonna?" I asked, my own insecurities coming out.

"A thousand times better." His lips quivered a little, a motion that he had never done before, or at least one that I could never see. "But I'll leave you to your shower. I wouldn't want to be the reason why my fiance is covered in blood all day."
Ville turned and walked towards the door, making his movements exaggerated so that I could admire his smooth body and tattoos. The ink on his skin was even more appealing than before.

Once the door was shut, I could get into my shower and wash the blood from my face. Water even seemed to have a new smell to me now. It was metallic and plain, but still had a scent attached to it.

I wasn't sure that I even needed soap now, because I knew that Ville didn't sweat or even need showers unless he was dirty. But the water felt nice on my skin regardless.
I stepped out and wrapped myself in a towel and headed into our bedroom. He was sitting in the bed staring out the window. I inhaled deeply and got the scent of him attached on my nose. It was beautiful, even better than before. Like a musky sunshine. He turned quickly and looked shocked.

"Please put some clothes on darling. If we're not having sex for a little while, I cannot be tempted with your toweled body." Ville turned back around and I could see his body tense.

"Do I smell better now?" I asked as I slipped the towel off and grabbed a pair of shorts and a tee shirt.

"You smell like you used to, which was a very floral and elegant scent, but there's less of a hunger that I get when I smell you. It's more desire, less... less... carnal desire. I'm not sure that's correct.." Ville scratched his scalp and turned around again. "If you'd like to know how you smelled, just come close to the sheets."

I was curious, definitely. I walked towards the bed where I knew that I had been last laying when I was human. Ville got up and moved out of my way so that his scene would not get mixed with mine.
It did smell like me. I recognized it. It was nice, flowery and light like Ville had told me. The smell of my own blood was a bit... disturbing to me. It smelled delicious, almost like I could taste it, but since I knew it was my own, I was immediately a bit disgusted by it.

"That's what I smelled like?" I asked. He nodded. "How could you stand it?" I asked, feeling the aching in my stomach as the hunger washed over me. Smelling my own scent made my stomach go wild, how could Ville stand to kiss me and lay in bed with me, knowing all the time that at any second he could just take a quick bite and taste a little of what was tempting him.

"It's easy when you're in love. Besides, I've had hundreds of years to practice the art of containment. If I don't want to drink someones blood, it's almost easy not to."

"But I'm just smelling this now, and the smell must just be lingering on the sheets. It must have been a hell of a lot stronger when it was me your smelling, and not just the remainder of what was."

"Yeah.. well... love does crazy things. You smell a lot better now. Less appetizing and more desirable." He smiled innocently. "You don't want to drink my blood now, but I still smell pretty good, right?"

I nodded. "Same thing." He shrugged and layed down, opening up his arms for me to climb into.