The Roxettes
I
Roxanne Ray probably died the most stupid death in the history of death. I don't mean to be crude, but it was so horrifically stupid it made a vagina look smart. Roxanne Ray was the queen, the bitch, the blonde Jesus of Watergrass High. She ruled the school. Some students were even thinking of making a bible about her. That is, until she died. It was one of those deaths where you think, 'wow, how did that even happen?', and you feel guilty for it.
I suppose you're itching to know how she ended up 10 feet under. Well, Roxanne had been in town with her BFFL (Best Friend For Life, for all you clueless people out there), a girl named Angelica, and Roxanne spent all her rich daddy's money on a fantastic make-over. She looked even more beautiful then she usually did. She was going on an expensive date later that night, and she wanted to look something like Tyra Banks.
So she went home to get ready with her ooh-so-glamorous dress and amazing make-up. Then, the little ding-bat decided to take a shower. But, shock, horror, what about her make-up? She really needed a spray, why, the last time she washed her hair had been that morning, and already it was six o clock! Her eyes settled on the shower cap, that was settled on top of a cabinet. She then proceeded to pull the cap over her face, to protect her make-up. She stumbled awkwardly into the shower, blind as a bat with no eyes. In about one minute, she was unconscious on the floor, suffocating.
She hadn't even realized she was dying, and by the time her body lay sprawled on the floor, it was too late. She had also locked the bathroom door, so it took about an hour for her daddy to decide to check on her, and another hour to get a fire-crew to break down the door. She was long gone by then. Quite sad really, but oh so so stupid. 16 years of life snatched by a ridiculous idea involving a shower-cap. Mayhem broke loose in the school population, it was bigger then Micheal Jackson's death. So, Roxanne Rea was buried, and never forgotten.
Angelica decided to make a sort of 'Roxanne Club' in her memory. The name evolved into 'The Roxettes'.
And that was how The Roxettes was founded.
I suppose you're itching to know how she ended up 10 feet under. Well, Roxanne had been in town with her BFFL (Best Friend For Life, for all you clueless people out there), a girl named Angelica, and Roxanne spent all her rich daddy's money on a fantastic make-over. She looked even more beautiful then she usually did. She was going on an expensive date later that night, and she wanted to look something like Tyra Banks.
So she went home to get ready with her ooh-so-glamorous dress and amazing make-up. Then, the little ding-bat decided to take a shower. But, shock, horror, what about her make-up? She really needed a spray, why, the last time she washed her hair had been that morning, and already it was six o clock! Her eyes settled on the shower cap, that was settled on top of a cabinet. She then proceeded to pull the cap over her face, to protect her make-up. She stumbled awkwardly into the shower, blind as a bat with no eyes. In about one minute, she was unconscious on the floor, suffocating.
She hadn't even realized she was dying, and by the time her body lay sprawled on the floor, it was too late. She had also locked the bathroom door, so it took about an hour for her daddy to decide to check on her, and another hour to get a fire-crew to break down the door. She was long gone by then. Quite sad really, but oh so so stupid. 16 years of life snatched by a ridiculous idea involving a shower-cap. Mayhem broke loose in the school population, it was bigger then Micheal Jackson's death. So, Roxanne Rea was buried, and never forgotten.
Angelica decided to make a sort of 'Roxanne Club' in her memory. The name evolved into 'The Roxettes'.
And that was how The Roxettes was founded.
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