You're My Backbone

"He's so going to ask you to the dance." Darry said, her eyes widening with excitement.

I gave her a look. "What? What dance, and who are you talking about?"

Darry sighed and rolled her eyes as we walked into the cafeteria. "Please don't tell me that you are completely unaware that we have a school dance Friday."

I slumped my shoulders down and yet again, Darry let out a long, exasperated sigh. "Well, there is a dance Friday and no matter what, you're going."

"Even if I don't have a date?" I asked, sitting down with Darry.

"Oh please June! Josh is going to ask you out. Trust me."

"Doubt it." I mumbled while I reached into my brown paper bag pulling out the sandwich I made for lunch.

"We'll find out soon enough. Incoming." Darry nodded her head upwards.

Josh suddenly appeared at the end of the table we were sitting at. "Hey ladies." He offered a grin.

I smiled back. "Hi Josh."

"Do you mind if we talk alone for a moment June?"

I shook my head and put down my sandwich. "No not at all," I began to get up then turned to Darry. "I'll be right back."

She smiled at me and winked. I rolled my eyes, sighing as I followed Josh. He took me to an area off to the side of the cafeteria.

I bit down on my lip as he turned to me. "So... were you planning on going to this dance on Friday?" He asked, uncertainty clear in his voice.

I shrugged. "Actually, I just found out about it, but I think I'm gonna go."

He smiled widely. "Great! Would you like to join me?"

My face started to heat up. "Um, as like, a date?" I was surprised at my question. It was much more daring than what I would normally say.

"Yes."

"Then, sure, I'll come."

"Fantastic! I'll pick you up at seven-thirty?"

"Sounds great."

"Alright June, I'll see you later."

"Bye Josh," I bit down on my lip.

Much to my surprise, Josh leaned in and kissed me on the cheek. I stood frozen in place as he walked away and out of the lunch room. My stomach did not had the feeling I would expect it to. Instead, a familiar feeling, almost like guilt, bubbled and bounce back and forth. I sucked in a huge breath and walked back to our lunch table.

"Oh my god!" Darry screeched. "He kissed you on the cheek! How cute!"

"Yeah," I mumbled, picking up my sandwich and taking a bite.

Darry's excitement soon disappeared when she noticed the expression written across my face. "Are you okay June?"

"I-I don't know." I croaked out.

Darry sucked in a quick breath before standing up. She rushed over to my side of the table. Once she was on my side, she grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the cafeteria. Darry and I rushed into the girls room.

Once we were in the room, I hoisted myself up onto the counter and rocked back and forth. "Oh god," Darry began. "Not again. Please god, this scared me so much last time."

My breath quickened and I tried to steady my pace. My head hung low and I placed my hands on my face. Soon, I was back to normal. I shook my head. "No, Darry it's okay. I'm fine."

Darry let out a breath. "Oh god."

"It was just a quick attack, nothing big or major. It's okay."

Darry nodded her head and paced back and forth across the bathroom. She stopped in her tracks for a moment. "Did Josh kissing you make you have the attack?"

I shrugged. "I think that set it off, but not really."

"What do you mean not really?"

"Well," I sighed, not exactly sure how to explain my feelings or actions. "after Josh kissed me I felt this guilty feeling. It's like, I didn't want him to kiss me. I've-uh-I've"

I started to stutter on my words. Darry then gently placed a hand on my shoulder. "It's okay June; you can tell me anything, you know."

I nodded my head understanding. "I've, just, I've never had a boyfriend before and I've never gotten that close to a guy who I'm not related to. I mean, I've hugged guys before, like out friends, but thats really it."

"But how does that make you feel guilty?"

I bit my lip and looked down at my hands in my lap. I sighed heavily. "I think I was just disappointed he was the one to kiss me first."

"It was only on the cheek June. And I thought you liked Josh?"

I shrugged. "I don't really know how I feel to be honest."

Darry then hoisted herself up on the counter with me. She placed an arm around me and squeezed me tight. "I'm sorry. I know you've been having a hard time lately. Especially with Garrett."

I bit on my lip, not responding. I couldn't talk about Garrett.

"I want you to know that within the time you've moved here, which is what-?"

"Two months." I mumbled.

"Since you moved here two months ago I've grown extremely close with you June. I haven't had a friend who is a girl in a long time and it's refreshing to meet a girl who isn't.... fake like Maddie and every other girl in this school."

I stifled a smile when I heard her call Maddie fake.

"And I know, well, we all know that something bad happened in your past June. I know that might be a surprise for you, but its obvious that you had a hard time with friends before moving here."

I groaned loudly and placed my head in my hands. "Was I really that bad?"

Darry rubbed my back gently. "No, you weren't too bad at first. Just, timid. But anyway, I want you to know you can talk about anything with me. I trust you and I hope you trust me. You can trust me June. You can trust all of us and you can talk to all of us. Especially Garrett. I know you two have been off lately, but he really likes you June. He was never good with new people and friends, but he hooked onto you right away. Despite this rough patch or whatever the hell you're going through right now, you have to know that Garrett would stop dead in his tracks to help you."

"Okay," I swallowed hard and nodded my head. I slowly and carefully slid off the counter onto my feet. "Thank you Darry."

"It's no problem. Really."

Before exiting the bathroom I turned around once more to her. "You know, you can also talk to me about anything Darry."

She smiled slightly. "Thanks."

I smiled before leaving the room.

"Oh my god. Fuck no," I spat out, narrowing my eyes at the two 'lovebirds' sucking each others faces off. My head whipped back up to John. "You are not driving them home."

John shrugged and sighed. "I already told Garrett I would."

"Why?"

"Why not?"

I rolled my eyes and stalked off to his car. I got in the passenger seat and slammed the door loudly. Garrett and Maddie's lips disconnected to look at me frowning in the car. It probably wasn't a pretty sight, but I could care less. Anger boiled inside of me.

John shook his head at me as he got into the driver's side. Garrett and Maddie slid into the back. Soon, Maddie's loud, obnoxious laughter filled the car.

I sighed heavily and shook my head. I reached over to John's radio and turned the station. "Hey! That was a good song!" Maddie complained about some boy band song I changed the station from.

"Sorry." I mumbled, but I had no intentions of turning the song back on, which is what Maddie was waiting for. Instead, I settled on some Good Charlotte.

I could practically feel and hear Maddie roll her eyes and whisper something into Garrett's ear. Most likely a complaint. About me.

After several moments of the radio blaring, John lowered it and asked, "Are you guys going to the dance Friday?"

I wasn't sure if the question was directed for me too, but either way, I didn't reply. John would shoot me if he found out I had a date.

"Yes!" Maddie giggled, "Gary asked me the other day!"

Gary? I feel like throwing up.....

"That's cool." John nodded his head.

"What about you June? Are you going?" Maddie asked.

"Yep." I popped the 'p'.

"You are?" John asked, narrowing his eyes at me.

I nodded my head, continuing to look out the window.

"Do you have a date?" Maddie asked, smiling, thinking that she knows the answer. Little does she know....

"Yep."

"YOU WHAT?" John and Garrett both yelled at the same time.

Much unlike Garrett, John then slammed on the brakes in the middle of the road and turned towards me. "You have a date?"

Garrett leaned forward, pushing his girlfriend out of the way. "Since when?"

I shrugged. "Since today."

"Who?" Garrett and my brother once again, said simultaneously.

"Josh." I rolled my eyes at the two in an attempt to ''stay cool''.

"Josh? You're going with him?" Garrett asked.

Anger and annoyance bubbled inside of me. I quickly spun around in my seat so I was face to face with my neighbor. "Yes I am. Do you have a fucking problem with that?"

"Yes I do! He's a complete asshole June!"

"You don't know shit about him Garrett!"

"I know he's a dick." He mumbled.

I groaned and shook my head. "Why are you being such a, ugh! Oh my god! What the hell Garrett? What is your problem? Josh isn't the asshole, you are!"

I quickly grabbed my backpack and slung it on my back. I went to open the passenger side door only to discover it was locked. "John, open the fucking door."

My brother was shocked, I knew that very well. He wasn't shocked because I had a date, but how I yelled at Garrett; not a brother, but a neighbor. In fact, a friend. He was surprised at how I exploded on someone besides him, Shane, or Ross. I only yelled at my brothers like that. Only they knew I was capable of exploding like that.

"You're going to walk home?"

I didn't turn around to face him. "Unlock. The. Door. John."

The click went home, I opened the door and hopped out.

As I began to walk John slowed the car to my pace. "Are you sure?" He asked.

I ignored him.

"June, come on!"

I rolled my eyes and turned to him. "I don't get the big deal here. I'm eighteen for christ sake! I think I'm allowed to have a date for a meaningless school dance."

"Come in the car June."

Now he was treating me like a five year old. To say I was embarrassed was an understatement.

"Just go." I stalked off.

I heard John sigh and pull up the window. As I continued to walk, John's car flew past me. I shook my head and flipped them the bird.