Between a Little Piece of Heaven and the Danger Line

"It's midnight." I told him. "I'll give you a ride, Jimmy. I don't mind. Dude...it's raining."

"Zack, you're fine. I got this, I know my way around your little neighborhood." Jimmy explained with self-righteousness. He knew everything, Jimmy was one smart mother fucker, hands down. He was an adventurist person. Jimmy would do anything, if you asked.

But if I was able to protect him from anything, I would. Damn right, I would. He was my best friend. I'd die today just to get him back, but I can't. It's too late. It's too late to bring Jimmy back. I failed him. I failed my best friend. It's all my fault that Jimmy is dead. It'll always be that way.

God, what have I done? I had no idea that this was going to happen, but again, life just seems like that. You never know if you're gonna make it these days. I blame myself. I blame myself for letting Jimmy run off home alone that night. I would've saved him, I should've--but once again; I failed him.

Sipping the last bit of wine, Val had walked into the living room with a photo of Jimmy right before he died. She stopped in front of me, grabbing my full attention. Valary stared down at me with complete innocence as she leaned over towards me to kiss my cheek. I swallowed.
"Zacky?" She answered gently, handing me the picture. It was Christmas, I remembered. Jimmy stayed over that night the picture was taken. You can see the digital time right below.
'Merry Christmas'
And Jimmy was smiling so childishly, almost like when we were in grade school with his huge hair and shit. Good times. Jimmy was the biggest kid out of all of us.

Looking at us all in the picture, I started to smile. Valary smiled as well, placing her hand on my knee cap.
"Like it?" She asked. "I totally forgot that I developed them a few days ago. I've been so damn busy and stressed--"

"I love this. This is awesome, Val. Are you gonna show Matt?"

"Of course, as soon as he comes back from the cemetery." She explained. "You know that....it's gonna take him awhile too."

It was a phase, I'm not sure if it's temperately, but it effected us all from top to bottom.. Matt would go to the cemetery for hours and come home late, threatening us, forbidden us to say anything about Jimmy. Most of the time, he'd just wanna be alone and write.

Johnny would come over and end sleeping in his car. First, Johnny wasn't leaving Matt's driveway in the first place, he didn't want to be alone. So who to really blame? Other than me.

And Brian. I don't see him often anymore, but I know he's in pain still. He'd never leave his place, he'd send demos of the songs that he'd written. It was random demos, the most unique thing you'd ever heard out of him in forever. Sinking into a musically medicated coma, in which it seemed to bring out his thoughts on the loss of Jimmy. I also know that he's not getting any sleep either, like myself.
I stay at Matt's, drinking all of their alcohol and cry for hours. I can't go home, I don't want to be alone. I miss Jimmy. I miss my friends. Most of all, I miss Brian.

"Okay." I nodded.

"So are you okay, Zacky?"

"Um...not really."

"I know. But wine isn't gonna help either."

"I'm depressed. Look at me, Val."

"That's not true, you're just going through a lot right now. Maybe you should check on Brian. Michelle says that he's not telling her something."

That's odd, that's not Brian at all. I thought to myself. "Alright."

"Take that picture with you, I want him to see it too." Valary explained. "It'll brighten his day like it has for me."

For some reason, Val was right. I needed to talk to Brian anyways.