A Photograph of You & I

Ville's P.O.V

"I can't fucking do this anymore, Bam. This is it, I'm done."

I stared at the reflection of myself in the bathroom mirror and tried to find the person it used to reflect. The man who could drink from the time the sun came up until well past it went down. The man who thought he knew what he was talking about when he wrote all those songs about heartbreak and death. The man who had never truly known love.

He was gone now. And in his stead, was a man in mourning over the loss of his heart. A man who needed nothing more than the love of a woman he didn't deserve to have. A man who was now learning what the true meaning of heartbreak was.

"What are you talking about, Vil?" Bam asked quietly. I turned to look behind me. Bam was sitting in a folding chair with his hands clasped near his chin. A complacent look graced his face but the turmoil beneath was easily recognizable. He was trying to figure out how to get Jonna out of here. He was plotting and I couldn't stand by and let it happen anymore.

"I'm not letting you try and fix things with Aina and I anymore. It's too much and it's not working in our favor. It's one wrong turn after another and it has got to stop. Now."

Bam looked more than confused by my words. He even looked a little angered. He stood up and looked me square in the eyes.

"So you're giving up on her. You're going to be miserable for the rest of your life with Jonna and a kid and just completely forget about Aina?" His voice rose as he grew more and more upset. A blush crept into his cheeks, though not from embarrassment. "You love her Ville and it might as well be a sin to say you don't!"

I pinched the bridge of my nose and released a sigh. "Bam, there's nothing else you can do. Jonna is pregnant. It's the right thing to do to accept my responsibility."

"And tell me, is it right to have your child be born into a household full of hate? Or better, is it right to destroy someone you love?"

"What would you have me do?" I shouted. "There's no other option!"

Bam narrowed his eyes at my statement. "There's always another option, Vil." His expression changed into something unreadable. "You know what I think? I think you're afraid."

I cocked an eyebrow. "Afraid of what?"

"You're afraid of being in love. You're afraid of taking a chance with someone so impossibly perfect for you that you're passing her up completely. You're playing it safe even though you know you'll be miserable."

I rolled my eyes. "I'm not afraid of being in love, Bam."

"You're full of shit." He replied venomously.

I shot a glare at him. "I'm not fucking afraid of falling in love! It's all I really ever wanted out of life but it would appear that I'm not destined for that happiness!"

He scoffed. "No, obviously not." He answered sarcastically. "I mean it's not like your soul mate isn't in the other room or anything..."

"Will you stop making things difficult!" I bellowed, growing increasingly agitated.

"That depends, are you going to stop being a dumbass?" He countered.

Without even thinking about it, I took all the strength I could muster and shoved him back toward the seat he'd just occupied. He fell over it in a heap and collapsed on the floor with fury burning in his eyes. I could feel the horror at what I'd done but for some reason, I couldn't make my face betray how sorry I was.

Enraged, Bam stood up and kicked the metal chair. "You know what? Fuck you, Ville! You don't fucking deserve Aina! Go ahead, choose Jonna. You deserve all of the agony she causes you throughout your life!"

Without another word or even physical retaliation, he stormed past me -- practically foaming at the mouth. The venom that coated his words was like daggers.

I slumped down to the floor and buried my face in my hands and groaned in frustration. "What the fuck have I done now?"

Aina's P.O.V

Bam stormed by me in a complete rage. I'd heard everything. We all had. Everyone who had been backstage, that is. As soon as the door had flown open, everyone began to busy themselves and look like they hadn't been eavesdropping. Some, like me, weren't doing a very good job of it.

"Bam, what's wrong?" I asked quietly, hoping that my face wouldn't give away the fact that I'd been listening.

He threw his hand up and continued walking, not even bothering to stop and face me. I looked on as he brushed past Ryan and stormed outside. The metal door slammed with a clang after him.

Ryan jogged over and put a hand on my shoulder. "I'm going to go talk to him. Why don't you go talk to Ville."

I bit down on my lip and turned toward the direction from where Bam had come and saw the bathroom door slightly ajar. I swallowed and looked at my hands indecisively.

It would be a gamble on my heart to go in there and talk to Ville. It could also potentially be a gamble on my life if Jonna found him and I together.

"Okay." I murmured. Ryan gave me a reassuring nod and left my to go back to the doors that Bam had just stormed through. The doors shut behind him with a clang that seemed to echo in the cavity that my insides had become.

My feet turned and guided me to where I knew I was needed, but I hadn't fully given myself over to going yet. I reached the door and knocked on it gently. Hoping and praying that it hadn't been loud enough to hear...

"What?" Ville's flat voice reached my ears and sent ripples of excitement down my spine. Every fiber in my being recognized and cherished how close he was to me, that is, with the exception of my mind which was still wary of my decision to talk to him.

"Ville?" I heard my voice but didn't remember opening my mouth to speak. I closed my eyes and let out a deep breath before pushing the door open.

He was getting up to stand, looking completely shocked at who stood before him. I pursed my lips and looked around, trying to will my heart to slow down but it resisted my attempts. The door closed silently behind me.

"Aina?" He whispered in disbelief. I scuffed my shoe across the linoleum floor and clasped my hands behind my back. I tried desperately to not enjoy the sound of my name rolling off his tongue like a song.

"Is everything okay? With you and Bam I mean...he looked upset..." I said quietly. Tremors shook my voice.

He looked at me for a long time as though he was trying to memorize every detail of my countenance all over again. A quiet fire smoldered in his eyes and it dimmed the longer he looked at me. I inhaled deeply and held it.

"I'm not sure." He murmured, taking two hesitant steps toward me. "He has every right to be mad at me right now."

He walked closer and I closed my eyes. I could feel a shaking hand reaching up to touch my cheek.

"What happened?" I asked, snapping my eyes open and looking into his green ones that now lingered mere inches near my own. I released the breath I'd been holding with a shudder. His thumb casually caressed my cheek.

"I pushed him." He replied.

I stared at him, not fully comprehending what he'd said. He'd pushed his best friend? Understandably, Bam had been instigating but I'd never thought Ville would get mad enough to shove him...

I said nothing in response, I merely looked at him. Selfishly, all I could think about was how much I wanted to kiss those partially open lips that were so tantalizingly close to my own.

"I'm sorry." He said, taking his hand off my cheek. "I shouldn't have gotten near you."

My heart felt as though another broken piece of it shattered to smaller pieces. I gulped down a breath of air and shook my head.

"Don't be sorry." I whispered, finding my voice once again.

I opened my arms to him slowly, almost not believing what I was doing. He seemed to sense that but held no hesitance when he walked into my arms and embraced me as though he would never let me go.

Not that I really wanted him to...

I almost smacked myself. What was I thinking? He's engaged. He has a child on the way! My mind screamed at me but my heart and soul kept me rooted to the spot. I needed him and I needed this, if nothing else for all eternity, I knew that this memory needed to be perfectly preserved to keep me going.

"I'm so sorry about all of this mess, Aina." He murmured into my hair. I felt his lips lay a gentle kiss on the top of my head.

That kiss seemed to make my mind let all of my inhibitions go. I looked up into his emerald eyes and whispered softly, "I miss you, Ville."

And before he could utter a single syllable, I brushed his lips with a soft kiss of my own.