Love's Not A Competition

“Why do I feel like there should be a but at the end of that sentence?” I asked him quietly. “What aren’t you telling me?”
“I am telling you everything. That’s what he said. He just promised me not to tell you but I did because, well, you asked me first. Just don’t tell him that I did, okay?”
“I won’t say anything. You’re the best, Eric.”

I wrapped my arms around him. I walked up the stairs to the second floor after letting him go. I didn’t bother knocking on the door as I walked into my dorm. Zeke was still there, sitting on the bottom bunk. I sat down beside him and looked at him from under my lashes. I couldn’t help the smile that crept onto my face. He had admitted, not to me but to someone, that he liked me. It made me happy. I met Zeke’s stare and he raised an eyebrow at me. I didn’t say anything, just stared into those amazing blue eyes of his.

“Are you okay?” he asked slowly.
“Yes,” I whispered.
“Did you need something?”
“No.”

I was probably freaking him out by staring at him but I didn’t care. I didn’t want to look away. He liked me. And I liked him, liked him a whole lot. I wanted to tell him. I wanted to tell him my feelings but I didn’t want to scare him off. I wondered if he would ever admit his feelings to me. I wondered how long that would take him. I sighed as I rested my head against his shoulder. He didn’t mind and he wrapped his arm around me.

I slept in his bed with him that night. It wasn’t planned. I was climbing up the ladder when he had grabbed me around the waist, pulling me off the ladder. I had asked what he was doing but he just put me down on his bed and lay down beside me. I hadn’t questioned him, just moved closer to him and rested my cheek against his shoulder. He stroked my hair until my eyes had slipped close, content in his arms.

We woke up when my alarm went off. I rolled out of bed and got up. I had training with Coach this morning and he hated waiting around for us. I changed in the bathroom and when I came out, Zeke was slowly getting out of bed. I told him I would see him later and he hugged me tightly before I left. I jogged to the track, trying to warm up. The early morning sun was weak but I knew that it would be gleaming down soon enough. Even spring was hot here. I couldn’t believe that the year was nearly over. Only a few more weeks and we would have exams before the summer arrived. I had already booked my flights home and wouldn’t be coming back until a week before school started again in the fall. It was my first summer home since I had been here.

“Do some laps,” Coach told me as soon as I jogged up to him.

I put my water bottle down and pulled off my tracksuit jacket. I was wearing t-shirt and shorts underneath like always. I did some quick stretches before running around the track. The rest of the track team showed up slowly for training and I could see Zeke near the back of the stragglers. He looked half asleep on his feet. I was amazed he had even joined the track team if it meant getting up early in the morning when he obviously wasn’t a morning person. He was always grumpy in the morning. I smiled at him when I ran past and he waved back.

I finished my laps and Coach told me that I should practice with the stop watch. The other sprinters were testing each other and I walked over to them. They greeted me warmly and we started. I went first since my length was the shortest. I ran it at least five times, each time getting better. My time shortened and I was puffing slightly by the end. I held the stopwatch for a couple of the others. We were done in about half an hour. There weren’t that many sprinters and I got up to get a drink. Zeke was stretching and I walked over to him. He got up and hugged me. I blushed lightly, wondering if people were watching us. I glanced around but didn’t see anyone.

“I forgot to give you something before you left,” Zeke said.
“What?” I asked.

He smiled and cupped my face before kissing me gently on the lips. My eyes closed as I stepped closer to him, resting my hands against his chest. His thumb stroked my cheek as he pulled away, staring intently down at me. His hand dropped and he didn’t say anything as he walked away towards the hurdles that were set up. He did glance back over his shoulder at me and smiled when he saw I was still standing in the same spot, my fingers touching my lips gently. I couldn’t help the small smile on my face. I sighed contently before heading back to the other sprinters. They were all staring at me with questioning eyes but no one said anything and we carried on like nothing had happened.

The day passed by slowly. Days seemed to pass before lunch finally rolled around. I had to keep myself from running to the dining hall, feeling too happy that I was free from class. I sat down between Brittney and Zeke. I ate my food slowly, savoring it. I hadn’t realized how hungry I had been until now. I felt Zeke’s hand slip into mine between us. I met his eye and smiled at him, blushing when I remembered this morning. I saw Katie looking at me when I looked away from Zeke.

“Are you two dating?” she asked bluntly.
My eyes widened slightly and I glanced at Zeke from the corner of my eye. He was staring at Katie, trying to look nonchalant. His thumb was still rubbing circles on the back of my hand but I could feel him tensed up.

“I don’t think that’s any of your business,” he said slowly to her.
That wasn’t no, I thought to myself. I knew we weren’t dating. He hadn’t asked me and I hadn’t said anything to him but I couldn’t stop that thought from flying around my mind. He hadn’t said no. Eric met my gaze across the table and raised an eyebrow. I shook my head slightly.

When I got back to my dorm room after the afternoon training session Zeke was waiting for me. He stood up as soon as I walked in the door and pulled me into a hug. He made me sit down on the sofa and I was wishing I was allowed a shower before he did anything. He sat down beside me and held both of my hands in his. I looked at him, wondering what he was doing. He was staring at me intently and I tried not to look as nervous as I felt.

“Jas, I know I’ve been really horrible to you over this year. I’ve treated you pretty badly. I didn’t mean to. I just don’t know how to act around you. I’m normally confident around girls but you make me nervous. I know that’s no excuse for what I’ve done but I want you to know that. I’m really sorry for everything. You didn’t deserve it.”

“Why are you telling me this?”

“Because when you came back from visiting home you looked so fragile. You let me take care of you and I realized that I want to take care of you. I want to protect you from the big bad world. I want to be with you so badly that it hurts when you aren’t around. I like you, a whole lot. And I want you to be my girlfriend. Will you be my girlfriend?”