Questions

When I wake up it’s only about seven o’clock, a lot earlier then I usually get up. I rub the sleep from my eyes and just stare at the digital clock for two minutes. I get up and head to the bathroom. I run my hands through my hair deciding later I would have to shower. Rolling my shoulders, I depart back into the room that Jordan and I were sharing.

Looking at his bed I get confused then head out to the kitchen. Walking into the kitchen I see Jordan sitting at the kitchen table. He's gazing at the table and sipping absentmindedly at his coffee. I smile and head over to the coffee brewer and pour myself a glass, spooning a few teaspoons into it.

I smile to myself, remembering that Jordan asked me to make him breakfast. I grab the pancake mix, traipsing over to the bowl of fruit on the counter grabbing two bananas then the container of blue berries. I turn on the stove and quickly cook up two pancakes. I place them both delicately on the plate, walking it over to Jordan. I place it in front of him, surprised he hadn't said anything yet. As the plate hits the table top, he jumps. Looking up and seeing me he smiles.

"Morning." he croaks, cringing at the sound of his unused voice. He grins at the pancakes. "Thank you... Can you show me where the forks and the knives are?" he blushes, starting to get up.

"Sit down, I'll get them for you, and they're over here."

He nods and takes the utensils from me. He starts eating and day dreaming. I sigh, same old Jordan. I make myself some pancakes and finish WAY before Jordan does. I shake my head as he still stares into space, walking to the bathroom and showering.

After doing so, I get dressed and walk back out to the kitchen. There, still sat Jordan, but this time with the addition of Cameron.

“Chris, this kid is freaking me out. He’s been sitting there, nomnomnoming on those pancakes for this whole time. Should I be worried? He hasn’t even said hello yet.” Cameron questions, nervously darting his eyes from me to him.

“He’s fine Cam, trust me.”

“But… he’s like fucking comatose.”

I laugh, “Cameron no he’s not. He’s just got low blood pressure. He’ll be with us in like five minutes give or take a few.”

Cameron raises an eybrow at me, “And, Christopher, how would you know this?” His voice is suggestive and causes me to just shake my head at him.

“I slept over his house all those times with you, Grant and Stephen. That’s how I know.”

“But I’ve never seen him like this before…”

“Cause all of you got up at bloody noon!”

Cameron eyes widen and then his face grows bright red, "oh yeah. So maybe you two didn't do anything... That I'd rather not know about."

"Cameron, nothing happened." I sigh, giving up trying to be forceful about it.

"So the kids okay? I can just like snap my fingers in front of him and he'll be fine?"

"Yes Cam, see he's snapping out of it already!"

Cameron stares at Jordan very hard waiting for his cheerful, and alert behavior to become noticeable. "No he's not douche bag, way to get my hopes up."

I roll my eyes, "look again"

Cameron turns back to him, and there Jordan, shy smile on his face. "Morning guys." there's a small blush on his cheeks.

"Jordan's back!" Cameron exclaims pouncing on him.

"Cameron, you've been on Jordan more then anybody." I laugh.

"Well, being out of Joplin lets me be the touchy geeky person i am! No more ‘Christian side hugs’ for me."

Jordan giggles and opens his arms, "pshh, you'll never get one of those from me." I take this as the perfect opportunity to get my first hug of the day from him.

"awww look at you two! Your cuteness already burns my eyes. The burning will only stop if you make out. Do it quickly... And slowly.” Cameron rolls his eyes and leaves the table and walks over to the refrigerator, "So do we have any more toaster waffles?"

Jordan doubles over laughing as I stifle a laugh. "So Jordan," I whisper, "He's going to leave in about an hour for work. Wanna watch some movies while he's there?"

He smiles and nods, "sounds like a plan, but um, I have homework and class work I have to do since I'm missing this week. I was wondering if you could help me.

"I should I just did all that stuff last year."

He nods standing up and on his tippy toes and kisses my nose, then rubbing his nose against mine in an Eskimo kiss. I grin wrapping my arms around him, feeling the heat rise in his cheeks. He leans closer, about to cause our lips to brush but pulls back. He starts chewing on his lip ring.

"Sorry, I just still can't believe this is happening. I thought you were never going to come out to me, even if I pushed you. But I don't want to freak you out by kissing you. And then this would be my first kiss and I didn-"

I silence him with my own lips, briefly, "you worry to much."

"that was a terrible movie. I can't believe I let you talk me into watching it." I mumble to Jordan as he snuggled into my chest, letting out a murmur as a response.

"Jordan, babe, let me up." I rub his forearms, in an attempt to co-ox him into letting me.

"chur warm." he grins, wrapping his arms around my waist. "I need a kiss before you get up."

Rolling my eyes, I peck his lips and slide him on the couch alone. After I head into the kitchen, to start on dinner, I hear the sock padded feet of Jordan, stroll in.

"So Cameron leaves in two days and we have this place to ourselves?" he questions. Without even looking I know for a fact he's blushing. This kid was just so fucking adorable.

"That we do." I nod, grabbing a jar of tomato sauce. "You eat pasta right?"

"yes. So... Um what are your plans for tomorrow... Er our plans?"

"well I was, planning on going to church. Your welcome to accompany. I think you'll like the church I go to." I cringe at first, knowing that there could very well be an argument about to occur.

Jordan and churches never mixed period. He basically stopped going after he came out at fifteen, about a year after he made his confirmation. I don't think he wanted to stop; he seemed to enjoy going just as much as everyone else. After he came out though, every time he stepped into the church people would glare at him, call him names, mumble something about hell in a quick prayer. And then eventually, Jordan just gave up on god. "Why should he have to pray to someone and only face hatred in return?" why should the bible discriminate against him. During this whole downwards spiral, Jordan even started to try and show people that some places in the bible stated it was okay, but of course no one would hear of that. After all of this, even his parents stopped going to church, and they loved church.

Jordan bites his lip, "I would." he let's out a deep breath, shoulders slumping as he takes a seat. "You have no idea how much I want to be able to go back to church and not feel like an outsider... I just can't take another little hating session. Seriously Chris, how can you go there when they preach about killing people like us?"

I give him a weak smile, "Come with me tomorrow, you'll see."

He starts nibbling on his lip ring, a sure sign he's heavily considering it. "I... Umm... I'll try. Did you ever stop going to church, even for a week when you moved out here?"

"For about a month I didn't go. I was trying to find a good one and then I did. Trust me, when you come with me tomorrow, you won't be disappointed.

"I hope so." he whispers so silently, I think I'm not even supposed to hear it.