Questions

This was the moment I had been dreading with my parents. There was going to be a lot of yelling, screaming and bible recitals. And what was worse is, they walked in on me and Jordan kissing, the only good thing is I had Cameron, Grant, Stephen and Cady here if things got bad.

My parents brown eyes are filled with rage as they glare at Jordan. They don't even seem to notice me. "Chris, what is he doing here?" my mother’s voice is icy.

Jordan cowers behind me. My dad scared the shit out of him... He even scared me.

I blink hard, swallowing. "He's visiting us." I can feel tears in my eyes and I have no idea why.

"Why were you kissing the fag?" my father barks, waiting for my response.

I look at Jordan, gripping onto his hand. "We're dating, Dad. This is my boyfriend, you already know Jordan." I can literally feel my heart beating in my chest. The tension was nauseating. I feel like I may throw up. Couldn't they just start yelling to break the tension?

"This is some kind of joke, right?" my mother asks, hopeful. I shake my head.

"You’re disgusting." my father yells, "this is unnatural and against God. You're going to hell, Christofer. You and your gay ass boyfriend. I guess we're never getting the grandkids we want."

Tension broken.

"Is that all you care about? Grandkids? Not the fact that I'm finally happy? Or the fact that I can finally look in the mirror and not see some fake?" I shout back. Jordan's gripping my shirt. He'd never seen me yell before. By now everyone had gathered around, staying hidden so my parents couldn't really see.

"You’re just following the devil, Chris. You're not happy. You just want attention. And from the looks of it," he grins looking over my shoulder, "you'll take it was just about anyone."

I clench my fists. "Stop talking shit about my boyfriend. Jordan's a human being too! He has feelings. Stop treating him like a second class citizen!"

"I'll treat the fag how ever I want. You're not gay, Chris." my father says adamantly.

"I am dad."

"My son is not a homosexual." he argues.

“Dad, I am.” I respond. “I’m not straight. I’m the farthest from it.”

“No. You’re not gay.” My father shouts, taking a stop closer to me. “This is a sin Christofer. You’re going to hell for this.”

“Dad, what ever happened to God loves everybody?” I shout back.

“Don’t argue with me, Christofer.” My father glares at me, taking a step closer to me.

“Dad just accept it, I’m going to pretend to be something I’m not.” I can feel Jordan’s grip on me tighten, as he shrinks back. My father always scared him. He used to scare me, but I wasn’t going to let him walk over me.

My dad takes another step forward and we’re face to face. He towers over me, well over six inches. His brown eyes actually stare into mine. They harbor a boiling hatred and overwhelming anger.

“Get your shit and pack up. You’re coming back with us to Joplin.”

“Dad, I’m not leaving.” My dad shoves me back, nearly knocking Jordan back against the kitchen counter.

“I’m not taking no for an answer.” He growls, pushing me again.

“I’m not leaving.” I retort, standing my ground. My father sneers at me.

“Listen to me and get your stuff. We’re not leaving until you’re with us. You’ll transfer back to a college by us, since we can’t trust you on your own.” He scowls at Jordan. “You’ll go to a Christian college and re-learn the ways of god.” He yanks on my arm and pushes me towards my room. “Get your stuff now!”

“I’m not leaving. If you really loved me you’d accept me.”

“Because we love you, we’re going to send you to therapy to get help.” My dad replies, nastily.

“I’m not going anywhere!” I shout, out of the corner of my eye I see Grant on the phone. His words are soft, but his lips tell me he’s rushing to get off the phone.

“If you know what’s good for you boy you’ll get your stuff and come home with us.

“Dad, what part of ‘I’m not leaving’ are you not getting?” I ask.

“I said don’t argue with me.” He says through grit teeth.

“You know how you found out I smoke, yesterday? Guess why I started. I started to deal with the stress of hiding who I was. You and Mom are the reasons I started smoking and drinking.” My dad used to be an alcoholic. He used to tell me if I ever started drinking he’d beat the shit out of me, but I needed an escape. An escape that only alcohol could grant me.

A new rage burns into my father’s eyes, “Get your shit now, we’re going to have a long talk about this.”

“No we aren’t Dad!” I yell.

My dad gives me a final harsh glare, before his fist collides with my nose. Jordan gasps coming towards me, trying to at least. My dad pushes him back, head colliding with the cabinets. I cringe at the sound, trying to go towards him.

My dad starts pounding his fists into my sides. I try and keep him off of me. I don’t even notice the pain. I wasn’t that strong or muscular. My dad Edward was about a hundred pounds heavier then me and almost all of it muscle.

I hear Cameron, Grant and Stephen all in the background yelling, grabbing on to my dad trying to pull him off me. I can see Cady out of the corner of my eye going to Jordan to check on him.

Somehow they got my dad off of me and had him against the wall. I take a few deep breathes trying to compose myself. That’s when I hear something.

Sirens.

Really loud sirens.

Outside our apartment

A knocking at the door.

A police man ordering us to open the door.

The rush of four police officers entering our house and escorting my Edward and Nancy out. Edward is stuffed into the car and my mother is ushered into her car. The police officer reprimanding her.

I go over to Jordan, kissing his nose. I wrap my arms around him. “I’m so sorry that this had to happen.” I whisper in his ear. “I’m so sorry you had to get hurt.” I mumble through tears, holding him tightly to me.