Status: One Shot - complete. Brian Haner Jr
I'm Leaving
Chapter 1 of 1
“I’m leaving.”
Her words still rang through his mind six months on. Not a day had gone by where he hadn’t thought about her. She had been his world, his life, his everything. If only he’d had the balls to have told her how he’d really felt. Maybe if he’d been honest with her from the start she wouldn’t be on the other side of the country right now. Maybe she would have stayed. Maybe they would have had a chance of being together.
But then maybe he was being naïve. Maybe him being truthful about his feelings wouldn’t have made a blind bit of difference. She was with someone else. She was married to someone else who made her happy. She had moved across the country for him and he had to deal with that.
Or did he?
What if she wasn’t happy? What if she only married him because she thought that it was her only option? Could she love him instead? Would he ever be that lucky?
These questions had been constantly running through Brian’s mind every day since Connie had muttered those two little words. The two simple words that had brought his life crashing down around him.
There had been part of him that had come to terms with the fact that they would never be more than friends. But at the same time there was a large part of him that had died when she had told him that she was marrying Caleb. But he was happy for her, because she was happy, and in the end that was all that mattered. Right?
When she had first told him that she was moving to the other side of the country with her new husband he’d told himself that it was going to be for the best. Having distance between them would help him deal with the fact that they’d never be more than friends. He had hoped that the old saying “Out of sight, out of mind” held more truth than “Absence makes the heart grow fonder.”
Six months later he’d found that it was in fact the second saying that had proved to be true. Instead of his feeling for her diminishing over time they had grown. He missed her more and more each day and she was never far from his thoughts.
Of course they’d kept in touch. They were still friends after all. They called each other at least once a week. And for Brian each call was bittersweet. The sound of her voice made his heart swell, loving hearing her talk about his new life, until of course she mentioned Caleb. Brian felt like a part of his heart was being ripped out every time she mentioned his name.
However, the thing that crushed his heart the most was hearing the change in her over the past month. She hadn’t seemed her usual cheery self. Something wasn’t quite right with her, but he had no idea what. it worried him that she wasn’t happy and at the same time he was secretly hoping that something had gone wrong between her and Caleb.
Was this selfish? Maybe. But he loved her. Her happiness was paramount above anything else. If Caleb wasn’t making her as happy as he once did then maybe there was a small chance that he could become the person to do it instead.
That thought was the reason he was now on a plane to New York. He needed to see her, to speak to her face to face. He needed to know for sure that she was happy with Caleb. And if she wasn’t happy, then he was going to be honest with her, tell her how he’d felt for so long. If she didn’t reciprocate his feelings then at least he’d know he’d tried, that he could live with the fact that she at least knew how he felt.
Excited nerves hit him as the seat belt light came on above his head as the plane began it’s decent into JFK airport.
“I’m leaving.”
Two words that she’d began to regret more and more over the last month.
When she had left Huntington Beach she thought it was going to be for the best. She’d not long married Caleb and he’d been offered his dream job in New York. Life was good and she was happy and in love.
Or at least that’s what she’d thought.
However the longer she was away from Huntington the more she longed to be back there. She missed it there; she missed her friends, her family. But most of all she missed him. She missed Brian.
He’d been her friend for so long. She loved him. But it was only since he hadn’t been there every day over the past six months and only talking to him once or twice a week on the phone that she realised that she was actually in love with him too.
It had scared her when she had realised it. it scared her to think that she’d made a mistake, that she’d married the wrong guy, that she may now be stuck in a marriage with a guy she didn’t truly love, that she’d allowed the guy that may just be her true love slip through her fingers.
She was also scared that Brian didn’t feel the same way about her. Surly if he did then he would have made his feelings for her known. Or would he? Over the past month she had started to cling to the small glimmer of hope that maybe he did love her but had kept quiet because he thought she was happily in love with Caleb.
She thought back to when she had told him she was leaving. he’d told her that he’d miss her but that he was happy for her if moving across the country to be with her new husband was what she truly wanted. But the more she thought about it, the more she was sure that she’d noticed an underlying tone of sadness to his words that she’d mistaken at first as being because his oldest friend was leaving.
She didn’t know what to do, and she was sure that Brian had noticed the change in her over the past month. She knew she hadn’t been her usual self whenever they had spoken on the phone. She always looked forward to their phone calls, his smooth velvety voice putting a smile on her face, wanting to listen to him talk forever, always looking forward to the next time they would speak.
It wasn’t as if things were bad with Caleb. He loved her, cared for her, provided her with anything she wanted. She loved him too, just not in the same way she’d first thought. She had finally admitted to herself that it was Brian she loved, Brian she wanted to be with.
With this revelation she was torn. What was she supposed to do? Ignore her feelings and carry on being married to Caleb and try and distance herself from Brian? Or leave Caleb, get on a plane back to California and declare her love for Brian?
But what if Brian didn’t return her love? What if she’d been wrong in her assumptions about his feelings for her? What if he laughed in her face when she got there?
He wouldn’t laugh. This was Brian, even if he didn’t reciprocate her feelings he still wouldn’t laugh, he wasn’t like that.
She had done nothing but think about her predicament over the last week and as she sat in the back of one of New York’s yellow taxis on the way to the airport she couldn’t help but smile at the decision she’d made.
She had to at least be honest about her feelings. She had to see Brian and tell him how she felt. Then maybe she could truly be happy.
As the taxi pulled up outside the terminal building at the JFK airport she paid the driver and took her small suitcase out of the trunk before she turned to walk into the terminal building.
“Hey, watch it.” she yelled as she turned to glare at the guy who had brashly barged past her, bumping her shoulder with his, causing her to drop her case.
“Connie?”
She turned at the sound of the familiar voice finding herself looking into his chocolate brown eyes. No more words were needed as they both smiled at each other, Connie finding herself being drawn into his strong tattooed arms before his thin lips pressed lightly and briefly against hers.
Her words still rang through his mind six months on. Not a day had gone by where he hadn’t thought about her. She had been his world, his life, his everything. If only he’d had the balls to have told her how he’d really felt. Maybe if he’d been honest with her from the start she wouldn’t be on the other side of the country right now. Maybe she would have stayed. Maybe they would have had a chance of being together.
But then maybe he was being naïve. Maybe him being truthful about his feelings wouldn’t have made a blind bit of difference. She was with someone else. She was married to someone else who made her happy. She had moved across the country for him and he had to deal with that.
Or did he?
What if she wasn’t happy? What if she only married him because she thought that it was her only option? Could she love him instead? Would he ever be that lucky?
These questions had been constantly running through Brian’s mind every day since Connie had muttered those two little words. The two simple words that had brought his life crashing down around him.
There had been part of him that had come to terms with the fact that they would never be more than friends. But at the same time there was a large part of him that had died when she had told him that she was marrying Caleb. But he was happy for her, because she was happy, and in the end that was all that mattered. Right?
When she had first told him that she was moving to the other side of the country with her new husband he’d told himself that it was going to be for the best. Having distance between them would help him deal with the fact that they’d never be more than friends. He had hoped that the old saying “Out of sight, out of mind” held more truth than “Absence makes the heart grow fonder.”
Six months later he’d found that it was in fact the second saying that had proved to be true. Instead of his feeling for her diminishing over time they had grown. He missed her more and more each day and she was never far from his thoughts.
Of course they’d kept in touch. They were still friends after all. They called each other at least once a week. And for Brian each call was bittersweet. The sound of her voice made his heart swell, loving hearing her talk about his new life, until of course she mentioned Caleb. Brian felt like a part of his heart was being ripped out every time she mentioned his name.
However, the thing that crushed his heart the most was hearing the change in her over the past month. She hadn’t seemed her usual cheery self. Something wasn’t quite right with her, but he had no idea what. it worried him that she wasn’t happy and at the same time he was secretly hoping that something had gone wrong between her and Caleb.
Was this selfish? Maybe. But he loved her. Her happiness was paramount above anything else. If Caleb wasn’t making her as happy as he once did then maybe there was a small chance that he could become the person to do it instead.
That thought was the reason he was now on a plane to New York. He needed to see her, to speak to her face to face. He needed to know for sure that she was happy with Caleb. And if she wasn’t happy, then he was going to be honest with her, tell her how he’d felt for so long. If she didn’t reciprocate his feelings then at least he’d know he’d tried, that he could live with the fact that she at least knew how he felt.
Excited nerves hit him as the seat belt light came on above his head as the plane began it’s decent into JFK airport.
“I’m leaving.”
Two words that she’d began to regret more and more over the last month.
When she had left Huntington Beach she thought it was going to be for the best. She’d not long married Caleb and he’d been offered his dream job in New York. Life was good and she was happy and in love.
Or at least that’s what she’d thought.
However the longer she was away from Huntington the more she longed to be back there. She missed it there; she missed her friends, her family. But most of all she missed him. She missed Brian.
He’d been her friend for so long. She loved him. But it was only since he hadn’t been there every day over the past six months and only talking to him once or twice a week on the phone that she realised that she was actually in love with him too.
It had scared her when she had realised it. it scared her to think that she’d made a mistake, that she’d married the wrong guy, that she may now be stuck in a marriage with a guy she didn’t truly love, that she’d allowed the guy that may just be her true love slip through her fingers.
She was also scared that Brian didn’t feel the same way about her. Surly if he did then he would have made his feelings for her known. Or would he? Over the past month she had started to cling to the small glimmer of hope that maybe he did love her but had kept quiet because he thought she was happily in love with Caleb.
She thought back to when she had told him she was leaving. he’d told her that he’d miss her but that he was happy for her if moving across the country to be with her new husband was what she truly wanted. But the more she thought about it, the more she was sure that she’d noticed an underlying tone of sadness to his words that she’d mistaken at first as being because his oldest friend was leaving.
She didn’t know what to do, and she was sure that Brian had noticed the change in her over the past month. She knew she hadn’t been her usual self whenever they had spoken on the phone. She always looked forward to their phone calls, his smooth velvety voice putting a smile on her face, wanting to listen to him talk forever, always looking forward to the next time they would speak.
It wasn’t as if things were bad with Caleb. He loved her, cared for her, provided her with anything she wanted. She loved him too, just not in the same way she’d first thought. She had finally admitted to herself that it was Brian she loved, Brian she wanted to be with.
With this revelation she was torn. What was she supposed to do? Ignore her feelings and carry on being married to Caleb and try and distance herself from Brian? Or leave Caleb, get on a plane back to California and declare her love for Brian?
But what if Brian didn’t return her love? What if she’d been wrong in her assumptions about his feelings for her? What if he laughed in her face when she got there?
He wouldn’t laugh. This was Brian, even if he didn’t reciprocate her feelings he still wouldn’t laugh, he wasn’t like that.
She had done nothing but think about her predicament over the last week and as she sat in the back of one of New York’s yellow taxis on the way to the airport she couldn’t help but smile at the decision she’d made.
She had to at least be honest about her feelings. She had to see Brian and tell him how she felt. Then maybe she could truly be happy.
As the taxi pulled up outside the terminal building at the JFK airport she paid the driver and took her small suitcase out of the trunk before she turned to walk into the terminal building.
“Hey, watch it.” she yelled as she turned to glare at the guy who had brashly barged past her, bumping her shoulder with his, causing her to drop her case.
“Connie?”
She turned at the sound of the familiar voice finding herself looking into his chocolate brown eyes. No more words were needed as they both smiled at each other, Connie finding herself being drawn into his strong tattooed arms before his thin lips pressed lightly and briefly against hers.
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