Wasting My Time Dreaming

Rian

Jack finally got on the bus, violently wiping his eyes. I rolled my own, not understanding why I was acting like this. Alex saw, and glared. “Rian, what the hell is wrong with you?”

“What do you mean?” I ask coldly, and this time, neither Jack nor Zack step in. This has to happen, and they know it.

“You're treating all of us like shit, but mostly Sydney. She's DEAD inside, Rian. And Jack's been working his ass off to keep her from breaking down and crying again. Rian, you don't understand what you mean to her. You're her entire world. She loves you with all she has, but it was never enough for you!” Alex yelled, and Zack stepped in.

“She told me that it wasn't enough. She knew, Rian, she knew.” Zack gave me a disgusted look, before walking out towards the bunks. I heard him flop onto his bunk, and Alex just stared at me.

“Rian, I know that you're doing this because it feels right, and that's your choice, not ours. But next time, think about Sydney. About us.” Jack didn't glare, he just spoke the truth. “I'm going to call her. Alex, play nice, okay?” Jack left, calling Sydney. Even from where I was sitting, I could hear Sydney's sniffly voice.

“H-hi Jack,” She whispered, stuttering as she cried. I felt that pain in the pit of my stomach, the idea that I had hurt her settling deep into my heart.

Why do you even care, Rian? One voice taunted, accusing. It was a kiss, and we all know you were hoping for something more than a kiss.

Hard to argue with that logic.

I mentally slapped myself. I was being a total dick. But did I care? Not at the moment, no. I had a month of tour left, a month where I could do whatever the hell I wanted before I had to deal with Sydney. Again. What was happening to me? I wasn't … me, anymore.

Holy God, am I drunk?

“Rian, Jack's right. Just please. Don't hurt her.”

“You don't love her, do you?” I ask innocently, and Alex sighs.

“I love her like a sister. Like I loved Daniel. So much it hurts to seem them get hurt. Zack is the same way. Jack? I know he loves her like that, and maybe more. But I wonder if maybe Jack would be better for her,” Alex said, his words ending with bite. He stood, shaking his head, and went towards the source of Jack's voice.

“A-a-alex?” Sydney stuttered, and another pain hit me square in the heart. I could hear Alex sigh, and take the phone from Jack.

“Yeah, baby, I'm right here,” He whispered, settling onto the couch beside me with the phone in his hands. Jack took a seat next to him, and Zack came back, settling on Alex's other side. The one farthest from me.

“W-w-what's wrong?” Sydney stuttered, and I could still hear the tears in her voice. I looked down at my shoes, rubbing the back of my neck.

“I could ask you the same thing, Syd,” Alex said, and then sighed. “Baby cakes, I want you to smile. I want you to promise me you'll smile. Because you never know who's fallen in love-” A wracked sob from Sydney. “With your smile,” Alex finished, looking guilty. Jack stole the phone, and whispered his sweet words into it.

“Like me,” Jack whispered, and I could hear Syd take a deep, shaking breath.

“And me,” Zack said, stealing the phone from Jack. “We all do.”

“What song are you listening to?” Alex said, and I heard the music bursting through the phone. It lowered, however, when Alex began to speak.

“'The Way We Talk' by The Maine,” Sydney said quietly, and Alex chuckled.

“Sweetheart, that's not the right song for your situation,” Zack said gently, and Jack winced.

“I don't care.” Her voice was clear as day, and she switched the song to a song that made her cry again: “Vegas”. Of course.