Status: Complete. (10.10.10 - 9.1.11)
To Write Love on His Arms
TwentyNine-
"Are you okay?" I asked. Atticus' internal dam broke and tears were just falling freely down his face. I felt my heart break a little and I pulled him into a hug. Atticus just shook his head and continued crying. He pushed me away and stared down into his lap.
"It just sucks ass you know?" He said, closing to his eyes tightly and his fist clenching. He tried desperately to fight back his sobs and banged his fist on the table, making me jump in shock. Atticus shook his head quickly and looked up at me.
"To love someone so much but in the end they fucking ruin you. They make you feel worthless about yourself and you can't help but feel as if maybe the world would be better off without you. That maybe it'd be better if you just died and no one would miss you." He said. I just continued looking at him as he sighed and continued speaking. I listened to every single word.
"Then one day you're on death's door because of the person you somehow loved and the police come and get you and they save you. They rescue you from dieing and you feel as if you can breath a little easier, knowing you don't have to worry about the abuse. The authorities try helping you and getting you move on and forget about the past, then the nightmares happen." He let loose a sob finally, shutting his eyes and curling in on himself. I reached out to touch him but he just moved away.
"And you fall back into depression and the wounds your once love had created start to show, you finally realize that they're there and how deeply they've cut. Your parents, the only people you've ever really had try to reconnect with you but you push them so far away. It fucking hurts and you feel terrible but it's something you have to do, because you can't risk getting hurt." Atticus' voice cracked. For a second I wondered why he was even telling me this in the first place. Why now out of every day that we've spent around each other that now he was just barely telling me.
Maybe he can't stand keeping everything bottled up inside anymore. I reached out and pulled the small boy into my arms, kissing his head and rubbing his back. Atticus sighed and burried his face into my chest. "I just really needed to get that off my chest, I'm sorry." He mumbled into my shirt. I smiled, "It's okay, you're one step closer to recovery. You're fine Atty."
Atticus pulled away and wrapped the forgotten green blanket around himself. The waitress came and set our food and drinks down in front of us. Atticus wiped his eyes and grabbed the eating utensils, beginning to eat his breakfast. I grinned and turned to my own food, eating it and savoring it's taste.
Your trying to move forward.
I'm proud of you Sunshine.
"It just sucks ass you know?" He said, closing to his eyes tightly and his fist clenching. He tried desperately to fight back his sobs and banged his fist on the table, making me jump in shock. Atticus shook his head quickly and looked up at me.
"To love someone so much but in the end they fucking ruin you. They make you feel worthless about yourself and you can't help but feel as if maybe the world would be better off without you. That maybe it'd be better if you just died and no one would miss you." He said. I just continued looking at him as he sighed and continued speaking. I listened to every single word.
"Then one day you're on death's door because of the person you somehow loved and the police come and get you and they save you. They rescue you from dieing and you feel as if you can breath a little easier, knowing you don't have to worry about the abuse. The authorities try helping you and getting you move on and forget about the past, then the nightmares happen." He let loose a sob finally, shutting his eyes and curling in on himself. I reached out to touch him but he just moved away.
"And you fall back into depression and the wounds your once love had created start to show, you finally realize that they're there and how deeply they've cut. Your parents, the only people you've ever really had try to reconnect with you but you push them so far away. It fucking hurts and you feel terrible but it's something you have to do, because you can't risk getting hurt." Atticus' voice cracked. For a second I wondered why he was even telling me this in the first place. Why now out of every day that we've spent around each other that now he was just barely telling me.
Maybe he can't stand keeping everything bottled up inside anymore. I reached out and pulled the small boy into my arms, kissing his head and rubbing his back. Atticus sighed and burried his face into my chest. "I just really needed to get that off my chest, I'm sorry." He mumbled into my shirt. I smiled, "It's okay, you're one step closer to recovery. You're fine Atty."
Atticus pulled away and wrapped the forgotten green blanket around himself. The waitress came and set our food and drinks down in front of us. Atticus wiped his eyes and grabbed the eating utensils, beginning to eat his breakfast. I grinned and turned to my own food, eating it and savoring it's taste.
Your trying to move forward.
I'm proud of you Sunshine.
♠ ♠ ♠
Atticus can breath a bit more easily now, huh? :]So I have four stories, that I haven't even written a chapter to yet because I need to finish my others first. But check them out please and see if you like any of them.
If you feel like reading something sweet and kinda common check out, Forever, Andy. About a mute boy who makes tons of paper hearts but first writes little notes or sayings in them before shaping them. And his struggled to reach his goal before graduation.
Or Maybe you feel like reading about a model and his struggles to find his real true love, check out As You Wish A story about love, lies, sex, abuse and finding that your in control of how you live life.
Maybe you want to read about struggling everyday just to survive the life as gang member and falling for the enemy, check out Run For It. A story about too sweet for his own good kid and his older brother as they struggle to live another day and not let their rival gang kill them.
And in maybe my next biggest story, find about how it is living life knowing you yourself used to abuse your ex-love and see how it is being the Abuser and not the Abused. Read about the others person point of view in a relationship of physical and mental abuse instead of always reading about the victim in Early Mourning A story about a boy who used to abuse his ex and watch as he struggles to realize that what he did was wrong with the help of a new friend.
Thanks to:
Skwahdala
Nytestalker
CeraRachel
WhoStoleMyCookies
BOOM!roasted.
For commenting :] and this chapter is for BOOM!roasted. because she asked to have me update soon. Maybe If I get four comments I'll update again later ;]
So
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