Love 'n' Stuff

Freddie

I’m not used to wanting to sleep with people I hate.

And I’m not used to wanting to sleep with people I love.

So what the hell is up with me that my dick seems to point like a radar at Jack and Matt whenever they walk into a room? It’s seriously confusing, man. I’m thinking maybe I just need to get laid. Like I’m so horny that I’ll consider sleeping with anybody who doesn’t look like a twelve year old girl in my immediate vicinity. I know a lot of guys go for Benny’s general look, since he’s all cute and adorable and shit, but I would feel really uncomfortable moving in and out of him and then looking up to see that childlike face looking back at me.

And I mean, it’s Spirit Day. People who aren’t gay are going to be gay today out of some sick, over-compensational need to support “us”. So scoring when we go out tonight shouldn’t be particularly difficult, and if I wake up to some tearful “I’ve never done this before, I swear”s, then, fuck it, all the more entertaining.

Jack

I need to get laid tonight.

I reckon, seeing as Matt is proving there are thousands of guys around the place who look just like Aaron and Freddie, I’ll find one, get rid of all my pent up sexual frustration, and stop wanting to have sex with the latter-mentioned so much. Or at all, even. I mean, it’s not like I’m crushing on him. I can’t stand him. It’s just that he looks so much like Aaron... Who, okay, fucked me over and fucked me up so badly that I’ll probably never be the same, emotionally speaking, but I’m too distracted by my almost-constant raging hard on to even worry about that right now.

It’s Wednesday and it’s Spirit Day, if I don’t manage to bring somebody home tonight then I have more to worry about than the Freddie/Aaron situation...

Benny

I need to stop being so depressed all the time.

I don’t think anybody has noticed because, well, I live with a bunch of maniacal sex-demons who only have one thing on their minds, but they probably will soon and even if they don’t, I don’t like being so unhappy.

I dunno. I think I hide it well. I think I do a pretty convincing job of making everybody think that I’m little Benny, happy-go-lucky, cute and carefree. But sometimes I wish I could shut off my brain. Stop thinking so much and analysing everything. Stop internalizing everything that happens around me and making it so I can’t think about anything other than how it relates to me.

I wanna be like the others. I mean, obviously I wanna be taller, broader, stronger, able to take care of myself and some day go back, find Austin, and kick him in the nuts.

But that’s not gonna happen. What I mean is, I wanna be more extrovert. Stop being so cautious. Go out and have fun without worrying about every little thing that could happen. Like that first night, when Jack and I went out, and we both got so wasted that neither of us knew what we were doing until our stomachs were covered in my come and he was pulling out of me and taking off the full condom.

I wanna do that again. Go out and have sex with the first person who looks interested.

Matt

Another night, another score.

Fuck my life.