Flashes of Emotion

Standing before my eyes was my second cousin Millie who I haven’t talked to in years. I remembered that she was going to UCLA for law but for some reason we never really got in touch. Probably because I didn’t like people seeing me in my shitty state and wanted to be all put together when I had family see my place. But I guess now I had no choice as she stood there looking wide eyed at me with some guy that dressed like Daddy Yankee next to her.

“Ro what happened?”
“I don’t really want to talk about it,” I say in a raspy voice.
“Uh this is Gael my boyfriend,” Millie says unsure of my current state.
“He looks like Daddy Yankee threw up on him.”
“He gets that a lot, um can we come in?”
“I guess,” I answer stepping aside then headed over towards the kitchen.

I heard them shut the door as I pulled the bottle of Captain Morgan’s hundred proof spiced rum from the small freezer. My back to my cousin and her boyfriend I unscrewed the black cap then drank straight from the bottle using it both as a mouth wash and antiseptic to clean the cuts in my mouth. As I swished the rum in my mouth, the alcohol burning my mouth there was a knock on the door.

“Ro let me help you clean up,” Millie states appearing next to me.
“Someone is at the door,” I respond monotone.
“I’ll get it,” Gael replies as there was another knock. Before I could protest Gael had done just that. I couldn’t see who was at the door seeing as that ghetto Daddy Yankee was blocking the way.

“Ro,” Millie says placing her hand on my shoulder.
“Don’t fucking start that shit Millie,” I snap throwing her hand off my shoulder, “This is my house and I answer the door.”
“Uh we came to return this to Ambrose,” the familiar voice announces. I pushed Gael aside and found myself glaring at the man that now stood in front of me with another man I knew to be the other member of Avenged Sevenfold; Zacky Vengeance.
“What are you doing here?”
“You dropped this last night,” Matt says holding my sketchbook/journal.
“Oh how chivalrous of you,” I retort sarcastically.

“The guys that did this to you got caught; me and the guys tracked them down with the cops.”
“Good for you, shit is level now, so you can go back to being what ever you are.”
“Can I have a do over?” Matt inquires.
“A bunch of guys attacked you?” Millie exclaims.
“Don’t be dramatic Millie, for all you know these guys are full of shit and I am just trying out for the What’s Love Got to Do with It remake,” I suggest humorously.
“Did you seriously just make a Tina Turner reference?” she replies attempting not to laugh.
“And a damn good one at that, don’t even resist laughing.”

“Fine, you obviously are okay since you can still make horrible spousal abuse jokes.”
“Horrible jokes are my forte, but honestly Millie I am wondering why the hell you are even here,” I comment giving her a look that said tell me now or I’ll do something.
“Our family is gets more information than TMZ, in other words your Grandma saw you in her National Enquirer, which in turn led to your brother looking up the whole thing with you and this kid, so I’m the closest distance wise and here I am,” Millie rambles.

“I suppose it could be worse, they could have found out I’m a stripper.”
“Wha? Please tell me you’re joking, I can’t lie for shit to anyone.”
“Nah I tried but apparently I don’t have enough daddy issues, or coordination but I’m convinced it was the first reason,” I answer with a smile.
“You’re going to hell,” Millie laughs.
“Good I need a tan.”

“You still need to tell me what happened,” she states.
“Fine, anyone down for some beer?” I inquire looking from Millie to Matt and Zacky.
“Sounds good what kind do you got?” Zacky replies.
“Modelo Negra,” I answer going over to the refrigerator.
“What do you want me to tell everyone?” Millie asks.
“That I’m fine,” I say as I grabbed a couple beers.
“But you’re working as one of those assholes that stalk celebrities.”
“I don’t have the luxury of picking and choosing my jobs Millie, but if it makes you feel better my boss is trying his hardest to fire me.”

“Why doesn’t he just fire you?”
“Because smartass he has to have a legitimate reason to do so. Plus I believe he likes to torture me, by giving me nearly impossible tasks hoping that I fail,” I reply.
“What’d he make you do?” Gael inquires.
“Get a picture of Quentin Tarantino and Brad Pitt together.”
“Oh that man! You got pictures of him, oh the things I’d do to him,” Millie rants with a dreamy look in her dark brown eyes.
“Hey!” her boyfriend responds giving her a look.
“Ro back me up on this shit, that man was the sex in Legends of the Fall.”
“I don’t watch excessively shitty romance films but it took me until Inglourious Basterds to find that man even remotely attractive,” I say as Millie gave me a funny look.
“That’s insane, why?”

“What can I say? I like my men sounding like they are extras from Deliverance.”
“That movie was fucking insane,” Zacky comments.
“It’s what dreams are made of,” I joke with a smile. The group laughed and I just leaned against the counter drinking my beer.
“So you got the pictures, how much did you get for them?” Gael asks.
“$700 or so for now, if other magazines want to use them then it adds to the overall pay,” I answer.
“Holy shit!”
“How much did you get for mine?” Matt inquires.
“Nothing, I didn’t get anything from that night,” I lie. I did get photos I just thought they were too raw for any sort of publication. The emotions were much too personal and private in my eyes.
“What’s with the wooden palates?”
“Oh um, I’m going to make something for a bed.”
“And you know how?” Zacky replies intrigued as he raised an eye brow at me.
“Of course she does, Ro can be a real butch bitch at times, must explain why lesbians flock to her,” Millie answers for me making me laugh.
“Now that you are in California you probably get more,” she continues turning to me expecting confirmation.
“I think there has been about a 53% increase,” I reply.
“Are you?” Gael starts to say.
“Nope, don’t get me wrong, I can find a woman attractive but I think it’s strictly on an artistic level.”
“As Ro would say, her job is to eye fuck the shit out of her subjects not actually fuck them….most of the time,” Millie adds with a cheeky smile.
“Fuck you heard about that?”

“Yes and honestly was the best answer to tell your uptight photography professor about what you are supposed to do with subjects.”
“I was dropped from his class and had to graduate a semester late,” I state remembering my last year of university.
“Was it worth it?” Matt asks.
“So fucking worth it, he was a chauvinistic asshole who took the life out of photography, if I stayed in his class I probably be a bottomless pit of regurgitated views,” I rant.
“Oh you do paint a lovely picture Ro, speaking of views I’m going to a protest you should come take pictures at it.”
“I’d love to----fuck no I can’t take pictures, mother fucking cholos wrecked my camera, its assholes like them that make those SB 1070 bills pass, fucking camera killers,” I ramble angrily.

“Aw did Ambrose actually make a political statement, I’m so proud,” Millie says with a smile.
“I hate talking about politics it gets me all hot and bothered and not in a good way, more in an 80 year old chain smoking obese man running a marathon kind of way.”

Everyone burst into laughter at my ridiculous comparison.

“I think that was better than you saying you wanted to bang Marilyn Manson,” she giggles.
“Oh fuck off; I said his level of eloquence when he spoke was attractive, I said nothing of the banging sort,” I respond.
“Yeah what ever you say,” Millie says, “Put some music on or something.”
“Fine, how about The Doors?” I suggest moving to my stereo set up.
“Nah, Gael doesn’t like the Doors.”

I turned around slowly and gave Gael an incredulous look.

“I’m sorry I thought I heard Millie say you don’t like the Doors.”
“I’m not into them,” Gael answers.
“What fuck are you doing going out with someone who doesn’t like the Doors?” I question Millie who only giggled.
“What’s wrong with me not liking the Doors?”
“Everything. The Doors are amazing and it is a proven fact that they can even make sex better.”
“How’s that?” Zacky laughs.
“Have you seen Jim Morrison’s hip gyrations? That mixed with his lovely voice it’s like a porno only better,” I state.

“That’s ridiculous,” Gael responds.
“You know what’s ridiculous? You not liking the Doors,” I say then turned to Millie, “Does your dad know you’re dating someone who doesn’t like the Doors?”
“Yeah, it’s okay though Gael likes Pink Floyd so that redeems him.”
“I guess that is somewhat redeeming,” I mutter giving Gael a suspicious look.
“I have missed you Prima,” Millie laughs.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” I reply as I turned on some Pink Floyd on low volume.
“So what are you going to do about your camera?”
“I don’t know see if it can get fixed,” I answer with a sigh.
“I’m sorry about your camera Ro, I know that you worked really hard for it and treated it like your baby,” Millie states sympathetically.
“It’s okay.”

We began discussing random things until Millie and Gael had to leave then Matt and Zacky left as well. It totally bizarre having company over and I had exchanged numbers with all of them. Matt and Zacky were actually really down to earth and I enjoyed their company. But my mind wouldn’t stop wandering back to the night where there was that intense flash of emotion in Matt’s hazel eyes.