Dear God
Response Number One
This is a response to Corinna Tate:
First, I appreciate all of your reviews and sharing of beliefs. It's nice to hear, because the subject of God is very near and dear to me, and I enjoy speaking about beliefs. I do not mean to offend you in any way at all in this response, so please stay as open as you are in your previous reviews:
I was born into a cold life. My grandmother said I was born in winter, and it was my job to find life in the summer. I no longer care if I sound egocentric: I was born to change the world.
There used to be a sort of demon haunting my house. It would plague the dreams of my family members and cast a feeling in the house like no other horror. I, being the youngest, should have been the most vulnerable. My brother, who is over ten years older than me, was the most easily affected. From when I can remember, which is the age of nine, all the way until twelve years old, it was I who woke up with a jolt and ran to my brother, bringing him out of the world of dreams and back into reality, where facts and truth are more easily accessible in comparison to a nightmare literally from Hell. It was I who ventured into the dreams because I knew if I could remind dream-me to pray, that everything would be fine. It was I who was strong enough to call to God for help; it was I who was brave enough to ask for help to get rid of the demon. Five years have passed and still no sign of anything evil.
My brother is mentally ill. He does not suffer from retardation, he is just chemically unstable; don't get the wrong idea, he is intelligent and a very capable person, he's still a regular guy; he's just severely bi-polar. When my family life completely crumbled, I did too. One night I was sucked into a fit of tears; it was one of the darkest days (well, really nights) of my life, and the details of it are no concern of any other than myself, but that night I was visited by God.
My room filled with light and in the corner – the corner that the demon had once had – was a light so bright that I should have been blinded. A man was seated at a grand piano, and he played songs of such sweetness that no artist on earth could come close to replication. He spoke with me, and that night I really did talk with God. I asked him questions about my problems, about life in general, about morality. I asked him if I was crazy, if I too would be afflicted with my brother's troubles.
No.
We are different people.
I didn't die because I was incapable of really doing it. I am alive because I have a focused purpose.
This 'letter' is not the one to speak about my conversation with God. This letter is my absolute true opinion: I believe that not a single line in the Bible is a lie, but I don't think that it is necessarily the absolute truth. I believe that faithful-to-God men wrote the Bible, not God himself. And I believe that everyone, no matter how fair and unbiased they are, project their opinions and their confusions and their truths into what they write.
If homosexuality were a sin, I would not have it. I'm only half-homo, but that half of me is not wrong. God put me on this earth in a time of great crisis. We live in a time filled with many troubles; my purpose is to help heal humanity. I, who has been blessed with knowledge beyond any 'five-senses' conventional gathering, who has been blessed with a visit from the Lord Himself, am not evil or wrong in my love. My first love was another young woman, and there was no shame or wrongness in it. No one, and I mean no one, can tell me that any form of love between two consenting, mentally healthy people, with free will, is wrong. A love between a child and an adult is not love, it's a sickness, but no one, and I truly mean no one, should ever compare homosexual love with pedophilia.
The only fight in love is the fight against the fear one holds. Everyone experiences anxiety about if their choice is right, if they pursue that special someone. God gave me the gift of unconditional love, but He has also equipped with me wisdom and free thought. I am with a boy now, and we love each other dearly, but in no way or shape or form is my love for him any different than that first. Both loves are from God, and neither have any evidence or feeling of wrongness. If God truly believed homosexuality to be evil, I would not have it.
I am in no way saying that I am perfect. I am not claming to be some sort of favorite. But I know my purpose, and I know who and what I am. I am a human of love and understanding, one who has been blessed beyond comprehension. I do not believe that he only wants my strength, but I believe he gave me said strength in order to help others. I know God will not let me fail because of the person he had made me. God did not save my life three times and visit me another just to let me be a failure. I am in charge of my own life and path, but He is right here next to me, He is in every choice I make and path I pursue. God guides me, and I in turn do my best to make the right decisions. I will not let Him down, and He will not let me fail.
I do not mean to be lecturing or yelling at you, but I do think you should know where I am coming from. I apologize now if I have offended you or if you feel in any way attacked, for that was not my intention or goal.
My brother and I are still head to head. He resents me; he thinks my mother had me to replace him. And a little bit of me believes that I was sent to replace him, but not because my mother had any bit of disappointment. I look at my brother and we are almost the same, but we have key differences. He is weak and is unable to do the things I have done and the things I will. He is easily swayed and can be very treacherous; he has become selfish and mean and cold. He chose a wrong path and he followed it out of ridiculous rebellion. I am not like that, and I will not end up like him. A part of me thinks that the purpose I have was supposed to be his, but he didn't fully let God guide him, and he couldn't open his heart to a truth larger than he.
Call me egocentric, or call me correct. I know who and what I am, and my faith in God cannot be altered, swayed, or taken or lost. We have a relationship that I am grateful for, and as far as my character and morality goes, I don't feel like I hold evil, sinful flaws.
I believe the Bible is a guide for humanity, for most of humanity is confused, and in one way or another, lost. Divine truth is found with a strong relationship with God, and I am more than pleased to hear that you have one with Him. Humans add an element to religion that isn't necessary, and sometimes, not even true. Only God can shed light on true divinity and truth in general.
I advise you to not believe everything you read or hear; synthesize every piece of information that is given to you, and if you have troubles, pray and ask for guidance. What you hold in your heart is no real business of mine, but if you find its contents to be a truth you believe in, then you are just fine. Those who put hate in their heart – and I don't want you to think that I'm saying this about you, at all, because I really am not – and want others to suffer just because they think that those others are doing something wrong, well, that person is very unhealthy and susceptible to the tricks of the Devil. Find truth for yourself and keep your faith in God strong, because love and knowledge provide the light to happiness and a good future.
Your faith is obviously strong and you don't need my opinions are 'advice' or anything like that. I don't mean to alter your faith in anyway, just to shed light on mine.
First, I appreciate all of your reviews and sharing of beliefs. It's nice to hear, because the subject of God is very near and dear to me, and I enjoy speaking about beliefs. I do not mean to offend you in any way at all in this response, so please stay as open as you are in your previous reviews:
I was born into a cold life. My grandmother said I was born in winter, and it was my job to find life in the summer. I no longer care if I sound egocentric: I was born to change the world.
There used to be a sort of demon haunting my house. It would plague the dreams of my family members and cast a feeling in the house like no other horror. I, being the youngest, should have been the most vulnerable. My brother, who is over ten years older than me, was the most easily affected. From when I can remember, which is the age of nine, all the way until twelve years old, it was I who woke up with a jolt and ran to my brother, bringing him out of the world of dreams and back into reality, where facts and truth are more easily accessible in comparison to a nightmare literally from Hell. It was I who ventured into the dreams because I knew if I could remind dream-me to pray, that everything would be fine. It was I who was strong enough to call to God for help; it was I who was brave enough to ask for help to get rid of the demon. Five years have passed and still no sign of anything evil.
My brother is mentally ill. He does not suffer from retardation, he is just chemically unstable; don't get the wrong idea, he is intelligent and a very capable person, he's still a regular guy; he's just severely bi-polar. When my family life completely crumbled, I did too. One night I was sucked into a fit of tears; it was one of the darkest days (well, really nights) of my life, and the details of it are no concern of any other than myself, but that night I was visited by God.
My room filled with light and in the corner – the corner that the demon had once had – was a light so bright that I should have been blinded. A man was seated at a grand piano, and he played songs of such sweetness that no artist on earth could come close to replication. He spoke with me, and that night I really did talk with God. I asked him questions about my problems, about life in general, about morality. I asked him if I was crazy, if I too would be afflicted with my brother's troubles.
No.
We are different people.
I didn't die because I was incapable of really doing it. I am alive because I have a focused purpose.
This 'letter' is not the one to speak about my conversation with God. This letter is my absolute true opinion: I believe that not a single line in the Bible is a lie, but I don't think that it is necessarily the absolute truth. I believe that faithful-to-God men wrote the Bible, not God himself. And I believe that everyone, no matter how fair and unbiased they are, project their opinions and their confusions and their truths into what they write.
If homosexuality were a sin, I would not have it. I'm only half-homo, but that half of me is not wrong. God put me on this earth in a time of great crisis. We live in a time filled with many troubles; my purpose is to help heal humanity. I, who has been blessed with knowledge beyond any 'five-senses' conventional gathering, who has been blessed with a visit from the Lord Himself, am not evil or wrong in my love. My first love was another young woman, and there was no shame or wrongness in it. No one, and I mean no one, can tell me that any form of love between two consenting, mentally healthy people, with free will, is wrong. A love between a child and an adult is not love, it's a sickness, but no one, and I truly mean no one, should ever compare homosexual love with pedophilia.
The only fight in love is the fight against the fear one holds. Everyone experiences anxiety about if their choice is right, if they pursue that special someone. God gave me the gift of unconditional love, but He has also equipped with me wisdom and free thought. I am with a boy now, and we love each other dearly, but in no way or shape or form is my love for him any different than that first. Both loves are from God, and neither have any evidence or feeling of wrongness. If God truly believed homosexuality to be evil, I would not have it.
I am in no way saying that I am perfect. I am not claming to be some sort of favorite. But I know my purpose, and I know who and what I am. I am a human of love and understanding, one who has been blessed beyond comprehension. I do not believe that he only wants my strength, but I believe he gave me said strength in order to help others. I know God will not let me fail because of the person he had made me. God did not save my life three times and visit me another just to let me be a failure. I am in charge of my own life and path, but He is right here next to me, He is in every choice I make and path I pursue. God guides me, and I in turn do my best to make the right decisions. I will not let Him down, and He will not let me fail.
I do not mean to be lecturing or yelling at you, but I do think you should know where I am coming from. I apologize now if I have offended you or if you feel in any way attacked, for that was not my intention or goal.
My brother and I are still head to head. He resents me; he thinks my mother had me to replace him. And a little bit of me believes that I was sent to replace him, but not because my mother had any bit of disappointment. I look at my brother and we are almost the same, but we have key differences. He is weak and is unable to do the things I have done and the things I will. He is easily swayed and can be very treacherous; he has become selfish and mean and cold. He chose a wrong path and he followed it out of ridiculous rebellion. I am not like that, and I will not end up like him. A part of me thinks that the purpose I have was supposed to be his, but he didn't fully let God guide him, and he couldn't open his heart to a truth larger than he.
Call me egocentric, or call me correct. I know who and what I am, and my faith in God cannot be altered, swayed, or taken or lost. We have a relationship that I am grateful for, and as far as my character and morality goes, I don't feel like I hold evil, sinful flaws.
I believe the Bible is a guide for humanity, for most of humanity is confused, and in one way or another, lost. Divine truth is found with a strong relationship with God, and I am more than pleased to hear that you have one with Him. Humans add an element to religion that isn't necessary, and sometimes, not even true. Only God can shed light on true divinity and truth in general.
I advise you to not believe everything you read or hear; synthesize every piece of information that is given to you, and if you have troubles, pray and ask for guidance. What you hold in your heart is no real business of mine, but if you find its contents to be a truth you believe in, then you are just fine. Those who put hate in their heart – and I don't want you to think that I'm saying this about you, at all, because I really am not – and want others to suffer just because they think that those others are doing something wrong, well, that person is very unhealthy and susceptible to the tricks of the Devil. Find truth for yourself and keep your faith in God strong, because love and knowledge provide the light to happiness and a good future.
Your faith is obviously strong and you don't need my opinions are 'advice' or anything like that. I don't mean to alter your faith in anyway, just to shed light on mine.