Love Shows When It's There

I carried Alex to the car feeling guiltier and guiltier with every step. Why had I just left him? I should have fucking stayed with him. Then maybe he wouldn't be unconscious and loosing blood fast. I began sobbing a lot. And heavily at that.

"Jack, you gotta keep yourself together man. You've gotta for Alex's sake," Matt said in a soothing tone. He put his arm around me.
"Here, I'll take him," Zack said, attempting to pull Alex away.
"No! Please. I'll carry him," I insisted.
"As long as you're sure," Zack said falling behind, in the opposite direction from Ross, who was leading the party. Had Ross and Zack argued or something?

We got to the car and I sat Alex on my knee in the back seat. It was a seven seater so we all fit in. Matt and Greico sat in the very back, Ross, Alex and I sat in the middle back and Zack at the drivers wheel with Vinny beside him. We got to A and E quickly.

As soon as I walked in carrying Alex, nurses and doctors came rushing over and immediately pulled him away from me. I began sobbing more, but it was silent. Zack and Matt led me over to one of the seats and we all sat down.

It was an hour later when the doctor came out of his room.
"How is he?" Zack asked as soon as he walked over to us.
"He's doing okay. He's woken up and doesn't seem to have any memory loss. His face will take a while to heal and we've done all we could to help that heal. You can all go and see him now," the doctor said. My baby was okay! That's all that mattered.
"Thank you," Zack said quickly before helping me up. We all walked through to the room.

Alex looked completely broken. His face looked worse now that the blood was cleaned off. He also looked terrified.
"Lex," I said just above a whisper.
"Jay," he said, holding out his hand. I walked over and held it in mine, sitting down next to him.
"I'm sorry I left you," I said, a tear falling down my face. Alex reached up and wiped it away with his really soft hands.
"I'm sorry our date was ruined," he replied.
"How are you feeling?" I asked.
"How a normal person would after being beat up," he said, chuckling lowly. Only Alex Gaskarth could laugh in a situation like this. I half smiled back, more tears falling.

"Aww, c'mom Jacky. Don't cry. I'm almost perfect and very alive," Alex said, wiping away the tears that continued to fall. He gave up and took my hand back is his before quickly pulling it up to his mouth and kissing it.

If I knew Alex was completely fine and able to talk, then why the hell was I crying?