Hand of Blood

Matt's point of view

My eyes wandered the ceiling blankly as I allowed my mind to get back up to speed. Considering the amount of drink I had had tonight, my power nap seemed to have done the trick in sleeping some of it off, how ever it was I did end up falling asleep in the first place. I honestly couldn't remember actually closing my eyes. One minute I was laying down, speaking nonsense with Brianne, the next I was staring at the ceiling in this silent room. All I did know, was that I had been rudely awoken by what I assumed was the sound of breaking bottles. Not that I knew where it was coming from, but it still caused quite the smash.

I sighed inwardly as I slowly sat up, and the room rotated slightly. Okay, so maybe I wasn't as sober as I had originally thought. I rubbed my face, hoping my eyes would get into a clearer focus the longer I stayed awake. I glanced carefully around the room, to find it was already working, and also to find I was pretty much alone in the room. Moose was the only person I could see, curled up beside his drum kit and clinging onto a cymbal. I paused as I thought how odd it was, before a memory seeped into my thoughts. I could vaguely picture Jay bouncing around the room, ready to throw it like a frisbee, with a raging Moose going after him. Only Jay could do something so stupid, and not expect to get pummeled to the ground.

I slowly maneuvered my body around so my feet touched back on the ground, and I rubbed my eyes again before leaning forward, resting my arms on my knees. My gaze fell onto the floor, where there was a stray marker lying dormant at my feet, making me frown at it curiously, before my whole face dropped. If someone had drawn on me, I was going to kill them. My hands rose back to my face, where I quickly ran my fingers above my eyes and down to my chin. At least it still felt like I had my facial hair. Jay could have been seeking revenge from when we shaved his eyebrows off.

At the thought of my band mate I glanced around wondering where he could have got to, and the more I thought about it, Brianne too. I could have sworn I remembered her sitting beside me. Neither of us had left the music room all night, from what I could gather, and I had spent most of my time with her. There wasn't going to be another oppertunity for me to do that, so I had already told myself I would make the most of her company tonight. It was all we had left.

My head shot up suddenly, glancing to the side as I noticed the kitchen door swing harshly open. A moment later, Brianne stormed through the open doorway with her expression somewhere between infuriated and distressed. I couldn't work out which, though the tears shining in her eyes led me to believe the latter. She didn't even look at me as she rushed through the room, stepping over stray bottles on the floor before walking straight out through the hall door. It was quickly followed by the sound of the front door opening, before being slammed shut again. That's what really caught my attention, as my eyes widened in shock and confusion. Had that just happened, or was I imagining things?

"Hey, Bri-" I heard Jay call as he stumbled into the room from the kitchen a moment later, my gaze instantly snapping to him. As my eyes met with his, he froze to the spot, looking at me with a hint of fear in his eyes. I glared back at him as I quickly stood up, not liking what this was turning into. What ever Jay had done or said, he was going to pay for it.

"Matt-" Jay started, his face completely dumbstruck as he looked on at me.

"What the fuck is going on?!" I shouted at him, unable to control myself as I turned on him slightly. My concern for Brianne has suddenly sky rocketed, and my anger wasn't being contained very well by the toxins still in my system.

"I... She- I don't-" Jay tried, stumbling over his words as he looked around desperately, searching for the answers. I growled at him as I turned away, not having the patience to wait for his explanation. It would probably be a whole story of lies, anyway.

As I made it out into the hallway and opened the front door, Jay quickly followed me out into the cold night air. I paused as I turned back on him, glaring straight into his eyes as I approached him as threateningly as I could. It seriously helped to have height advantages over this guy.

"Oh fuck no. You are staying here," I growled at him, pushing him backwards towards the house again. I didn't give him time to object as I turned away from him, storming off onto the dark street and knowing in my head that if he followed me, I would not hesitate to force him to stay. Whatever had happened, it was his fault and I knew nothing he could do would make that better right now.

I jogged down the street in the only direction I assumed Brianne would go. It was the way we walked to Jay's house from hers. It would make sense for her to go that way, even in her probably drunken state, because she knew that way better than any other. Even if it was in the dark. Unfortunately though, this way had less streets lights, which made it much more difficult to see anything other than parked cars and garden walls beside me.

I glanced around desperately, trying to catch a glimpse of any movement in the quiet street. "Brianne, where are you?" I called out, hoping for some reaction. Maybe if she heard me she'd think twice and turn back, or at least stop and give me time to catch up. I frowned into the darkness as neither seemed to be working. I took a few more steps before squinting through the shadows, looking for anything.

"Brianne!" I called again, working my way a little further down the street. I just couldn't see her anywhere, almost like she wasn't here at all. She had to be. She wouldn't have gone the other way, would she?

I paused as I took a deep breath, running my fingers through my hair stressfully as my eyes desperately searched the still street. If only I still wasn't slightly drunk, maybe I'd actually be able to work out where the hell she had got to. Once again, I'd fucked up in being able to look out for Brianne. I was so going to kill Jay once I got back to the house.

My attention snapped round as a sound caught my ears. The definite sound of footsteps. I turned to face the direction they were coming from, even further down the street. I paused as I realised what they were doing. They were getting quicker, and going in the opposite direction that I was in. I frowned a little as I took a few careful steps towards the sound, tilting my head as I tried to work out if it was who I was looking for. I didn't want to end up chasing after someone who was actually the wrong person, but it was incredibly hard to judge.

Suddenly the unmistakable voice of Brianne squeaked out across the quiet street, as her footsteps abruptly scuffled and stopped, telling me that she must have tripped. However, it was quickly followed by her unsteady footsteps still hurrying away, causing me to frown in confusion. Why was she running from me?

I started sprinting down the street in the direction that I now knew Brianne was in. After running past over a dozen parked cars, I finally saw her stumbling frame in the distance, still trying to get away. I frowned as I called her again, yet she didn't react and if anything started moving faster. My heart dropped as I heard her muffled cries echoing out across the street.

"Brianne, what are you doing?" I asked softly as I finally caught up, jogging just behind her as she continued to ignore my presence. I watched as she started slowly shaking her head, never once slowing her steps. I frowned to myself as I moved up beside her, trying to catch a glimpse of her face that was bowed to the ground. As I placed a hand on her shoulder she flinched away from it violently, speeding up as she tried to get away from me. I watched her in confusion before making my advance again, this time standing directly in front of her and walking backwards so I could face her.

"Brianne," I started again, my heart dropping at the sight of tears shimmering down her cheeks. "Please," I tried, but never once did she raise her eyes to me. They stayed fixed on the pavement below her feet as she walked.

"Go away, Matt," she mumbled stonily, bringing an arm up to roughly rub away her tears. I watched her at a complete loss of what to do, and the only thing I had left to think about was to stop her. I bought my hands up to rest on her shoulders, and she instantly tried to shake me off again. I frowned as I held onto her as she struggled, walking backwards to try and get away.

"Leave me alone!" Brianne exclaimed as she fought with me. In her desperation, her eyes finally turned up to meet with mine, filled with tears and fear before falling away a moment later to set firmly on the ground almost shamefully.

"You don't know where you are," I reasoned quietly, as Brianne's struggling gradually started to slow. She seemed to be running out of the energy to fight with me, which I was thankful for.

"I'll find my way," she mumbled back stubbornly, as she finally stood still, her head hung low as she kept her gaze on the floor. I paused as I slowly released my grip on her, only to have her bolt away from me the moment I did so, my reactions not fast enough to catch her as she moved around me. I sighed inwardly and watched almost irritably as she started running up the street, further away from the house. She really was pulling out all the stops to get away from me, even faking submission.

"Fuck, Bri," I breathed to myself, running my fingers through my hair before taking off once more after her. I honestly didn't have a clue what had gotten into her, but I had to bring her back whether she liked it or not. What kind of person would I be if I didn't?

I easily caught up to her again, taking a new approach in attempt to restrain Brianne by running straight into her and wrapping my arms around her waist. She naturally started struggling against me, kicking her feet as I pulled her backwards into my chest. I clenched my teeth from the pain as I felt her starting to dig her nails into my arms around her waist, desperately trying to pry my arms away from her.

"Brianne what the hell are you doing?!" I hissed down to her, more harshly than I had probably intended. But damn, she was being so difficult!

"Let me go," she choked quietly, still fighting with tears. "Just let me go!" She screamed, her voice piercing the air, her body furiously struggling against me now. I felt my irritation suddenly dissolve the moment the cries fell from her lips, echoing across around the street and bouncing back again. The pure pain and distress in her tone hit me hard. It stopped my heart beating for just a split second. She was so fucking scared, that's all this was, and the realisation was seeping into me with a huge punch of guilt. There was no real reason for me to be angry at her. I shouldn't be angry at her.

"Brianne," I mumbled softly. "I can't. You have to come back," I explained, trying to keep my voice as calm as possible. I couldn't stop it from shaking, though.

"No," she choked out again, ever defiantly as she continued to fight her way out of my arms. It took a while, but this time she genuinely was slowing down. I could feel her muscles relaxing and her whole body growing heavy within my tight grasp. I think I probably had alcohol, sleep deprivation and the after effects of an adrenaline rush to help me out.

I sighed to myself in slight relief as I finally felt like I was getting somewhere, whether or not it was real on Brianne's part. I slowly took a few steps backwards, turning us around so I was leaning back against a garden wall and allowing us both a moments rest. I could feel Brianne falling back against me as I allowed myself to relax a little more, making a small hopeful smile tug at my lips.

"Okay?" I breathed to Brianne, setting my head against hers while trying to keep my voice as soft as possible, considering how erratic my breathing was after our tussle. I could feel Brianne's stomach rising and falling quickly beneath my arms as she caught her breath. My own heard was pumping furiously in my chest, making me almost certain she would be able to feel it against her back.

Instead of a response, Brianne sniffed back her tears as she bought her hands up to her face, shaking her head slowly. I frowned as I allowed my grip to loosen on her just slightly, just enough to try and be comforting rather than restraining.

"I can't, I can't..." She mumbled into her hands, as I felt her whole body start to shake from cries again. I slowly slid my hands back from her stomach to rest loosely on her hips, before pushing both of us up from the wall. I gradually myself moved around her body, making sure my hands ran across her skin just in case she tried to run again. I couldn't see it happening, and it hurt me a little to assume it, but I had to be careful. I didn't understand her tonight, more than ever.

I looked down on Brianne curiously as she kept her hidden from me beneath her hands. Timidly she slowly lowered them, looking up at me with wide, lost eyes. I swallowed hard as the black smudges down her cheeks brought back bad memories, my grip on her hips tightening just a fraction as I pushed the thoughts away. After a moment Brianne timidly rose her hands upwards towards my face, appearing to watch me in disbelief. My eyes travelled over her in confusion as her finger tips lightly brushed my cheeks, slowly running upwards along the bones beneath the skin. It took me a while to notice I had been holding my breath in anticipation.

Brianne slowly started shaking her head again, eyes filling up as her hands slowly fell away, her fingers retraced their steps. I could feel her subtly moving backwards beneath my touch. Instinct seemed to take over as I quickly moved forward, wrapping my arms around her tightly and holding her close, refusing to let her go again. Her hands instantly moved forward again, having no choice but to settle on the back of my neck as I felt her whole body starting to shake like before.

"I'm sorry," I heard her mumbled into my shoulder. "I'm so fucking sorry," she choked, gripping onto me tightly before her fingers worked their way upwards through the back of my hair. The action sent goosebumps through me, just like the first time she had done that tonight. I swallowed back the nerves suddenly spiking through me as I shook my head slowly in response, simply holding onto Brianne without another idea of what to do. I had to get her back to the house, but I had to find out was wrong or we would get no where. I had to sort this out and make her feel better. She was breaking down on the inside, so much so she couldn't even believe I was here. She was somewhere between wanting to be alone and not wanting me to let go. She couldn't leave like this.

"C'mon, let's go home," I whispered, slowly raising my hand upwards from her back to stroke her hair. She instantly started shaking her head, trying to pull away again, though my other hand on her back held her firmly in place against me.

"No, I'm not... I can't," Brianne mumbled, pulling away from me and successfully creating distance between us. She paused in confusion the moment I didn't stop her, my hands now sitting on her waist again as she stood back from me, her own hands holding my face lightly again. It only confirmed my suspicions that she didn't know what she wanted right now.

"You're coming back one way or another," I replied quietly, making the curiosity in her eyes grow. "So lets just make this simple, okay?" I requested softly, not breaking Brianne's eye contact with mine. I could see her still desperately fighting with herself to run away from me, but at the same time she knew she had to come back. What I couldn't understand was what could have shaken her up so badly to make her question it that much.

Brianne's hands slowly fell away from my face as her gaze fell down the the ground, almost defeated. I sighed inwardly, stepping a little closer to her again.

"Let's go," I whispered softly, placing finger lightly on Brianne's chin and raising her gaze to meet back with mine. They were still so full of pain. "Aren't you cold?" I asked lightly, causing just a slight reaction as she nodded a little. I smiled back weakly, before slowly moving forward and lightly pressing a kiss to her forehead comfortingly. I could have sworn she flinched away from it, which instantly made me regret the action. I frowned to myself as I moved back, before carefully and firmly taking her hand in mind and turning us back around, towards Jay's house.

As I started walking Brianne stood still for a moment, making me glance back at her curiously. Her eyes were blankly watching the ground again, and I tugged at her hand to get some of her attention. She glanced back up at me, her eyes cold as they met with mine. I swallowed hard as I turned away, not being able to keep the contact. Those eye's weren't Brianne, but some part of me told me they were. I felt like it was that part of herself she had always hid from us, but I couldn't work out why. It just felt so real; so raw. It hurt like hell to see.

I frowned deeply as I started leading the ever reluctant Brianne back to the house. This was going to be a long night, I could feel it.