Deceptive in Truth

Some wonder, about what happens after you lose a loved one. Some some think they know the answer. But only she knew the entire affect. Because only Candy had lost all of her loved ones before her very eyes. She was lying on her bed, in Surrey, London, trying not to remember the one year anniversary that was about to come about any minute. The one year anniversary of her death and the deaths of those around her. Candy heard the clock ticking slowly away, and she knew it had come. The anniversary of the Blackstone’s death, and several of her body guards.

The day she watched them die. The day she held her dying love in her arms. The day she watched the life trail away like a ghosts as his eyes rolled back into his beautiful head. As she lay splayed out on the soft bed, she choked on tears she didn’t even know had sprouted in her eyes. She had thought she had grown strong enough not to have cried. But obviously, she had been wrong. Candy rolled over onto her stomach, stuffing her face into the soft sheets. This was all her fault.

A flashback of Gaspard’s beautiful face the second before his throat had been slit open like a pig in a slaughter house. He was the most beautiful then. The pallor of his skin; like something caught between life and death. The shape of his large ocean colored eyes, which begged her to save him. The way his hair so carelessly fell, as if he had done nothing to it at all. That was when Gaspard had been most beautiful to her. When he was about to die.

It was horrible for her to think like this, she knew. It was what kept her sane though. When one had lost everything and had nothing to go back to, they tended to lose themselves. They began to fill up with animosity, loneliness and regrets to the world. They began to feel like nothing was ever going to be good enough for them. Like they would be at fault for everything, and lose everything they ever had. Like their soul would never be reunited again, like they would never feel the subtle joy they got when they saw a loved one. But instead the sudden longing of hope that they indeed, did see their loved one when they saw someone who looked similar to them. But it wasn’t. It never would be because their loved one was dead.

She rolled over onto her side, suddenly restless. She needed to feed. Needed to get her mind off of everything. She wanted to kill. Candy rose from her bed with subtle ease, barely leaving an indentation from where she had just been. Her eyes glowered at her reflection, filled with that animosity that came with looking at oneself. The image of the killer of your loved ones; and sometimes, they didn’t even have to hold the weapon.