Ghost in the Machine
so the whole world knows .
There's a far away voice in the back of my head. I can't quite make out who it's coming from, and I can't place the direction either. It comes again, and this time I feel my head hit a hard surface, and I jerk myself to life.
“Whoa, Ellie, wake up. It's almost time to go, finish eating.” That's my mom's voice, and now I remember. I'm sitting at the kitchen table, a bowl of cold cereal in front of my. I've gotten so little sleep over the last few weeks that I dozed with my head on the table top.
I looked down at the soggy bowl of Cheerios and sighed. There was no explaining why I suddenly lost my appetite for eating anything this morning. I pushed my bowl away from me and stood, grabbing my backpack from the floor next to me and high tailed it out the door to my car without a word.
The car had been a gift to me for my seventeenth birthday last year from my dad before he went off to Afghanistan. When I drive it, I try not to think about the fact that he's probably hiding out in a desert somewhere, trying to avoid getting bombed.
I drive to school, and everything is normal. It's the normal Monday drag, and it's the normal chaos in the parking lot. I park in my normal place, and I set out into the normal parking lot, getting ready to start my perfectly normal day.
I make it up the front steps with nothing extra special.
I make it into home room.
I go through the routine hellos and how are yous to the usual people.
Then the abnormal moments start up.
Becky Norman reaches between the gap between our desks and nudges me with her elbow. “Hey, is that Peter?”
I snap my head to the door of homeroom, and there, sure enough is Peter Holmes. God. I haven't seen him... in at least two years or so.
The color drains from my face, and I can feel Becky staring at me, then back to him. “Is he back?” She say. “I thought... after...”
“Yeah.” I cut her off before she can finish. I don't want to think about what happened two years ago. I don't want to think about the reason why Peter left, and I don't want to think about why he could possibly be back, and what I was going to have to say to him since we're in the same home room. I don't want to think about the circumstances that I last saw him in.
“Whoa, Ellie, wake up. It's almost time to go, finish eating.” That's my mom's voice, and now I remember. I'm sitting at the kitchen table, a bowl of cold cereal in front of my. I've gotten so little sleep over the last few weeks that I dozed with my head on the table top.
I looked down at the soggy bowl of Cheerios and sighed. There was no explaining why I suddenly lost my appetite for eating anything this morning. I pushed my bowl away from me and stood, grabbing my backpack from the floor next to me and high tailed it out the door to my car without a word.
The car had been a gift to me for my seventeenth birthday last year from my dad before he went off to Afghanistan. When I drive it, I try not to think about the fact that he's probably hiding out in a desert somewhere, trying to avoid getting bombed.
I drive to school, and everything is normal. It's the normal Monday drag, and it's the normal chaos in the parking lot. I park in my normal place, and I set out into the normal parking lot, getting ready to start my perfectly normal day.
I make it up the front steps with nothing extra special.
I make it into home room.
I go through the routine hellos and how are yous to the usual people.
Then the abnormal moments start up.
Becky Norman reaches between the gap between our desks and nudges me with her elbow. “Hey, is that Peter?”
I snap my head to the door of homeroom, and there, sure enough is Peter Holmes. God. I haven't seen him... in at least two years or so.
The color drains from my face, and I can feel Becky staring at me, then back to him. “Is he back?” She say. “I thought... after...”
“Yeah.” I cut her off before she can finish. I don't want to think about what happened two years ago. I don't want to think about the reason why Peter left, and I don't want to think about why he could possibly be back, and what I was going to have to say to him since we're in the same home room. I don't want to think about the circumstances that I last saw him in.
♠ ♠ ♠
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