If I Die Young

We quickly flew apart. Jamie looked at me as she touched her lips with her fingers, unbelieving of what just happened between us. We sat there like that for what seemed like forever. We had forgotten all about the voice that called her. I could tell she had the same thing on her mind as I did. What did we just do?

“Moose,” Jackson said, revealing him as the voice. We both looked at him, breaking our glaze. “I’ve been looking for you. I was actually looking both y’all.” He stopped, looking at each of us. “I’m not interrupting anything am I?”

“Nah, not at all. We were just about to come in,” Jamie said, picking herself off the ground, gracefully. “Right, Scott?”

I only nodded in agreement, following her suit. Jackson seemed to believe the lie Jamie came up with.

“Good, because Zack is beyond wasted. He fell into a bush outside and refuses to get out of it. And he’s threatening a college football player that he’ll beat him up with his shoe. The guy is twice the size of Zack and twice as drunk. I need y’all to go get him out. I’ve tried but failed.”

“Again?” Jamie asked. But it wasn’t surprising. Zack got drunk at all the parties and was always doing something like this.

“Yeah, please go get him.” Jackson left us outside to go get Zack. Alone.

Jamie turned to go where Zack might be located but not before she gave me a look. A look that screamed we shouldn’t have done what we just did. Maybe it was because it would mess everything up in our lives right now or she was afraid I would fall in love with her and she knew she could never return those feelings. Maybe it would ruin her plans of having nothing to stay here for. I don’t know but that look bore a hole in my brain. I followed Jamie to a bush that was dented by Zack. He just looked up and smiled.

“Moose, I love you,” He screamed, slurring his words.

“I know you do, Zack. Why don’t you get out of the bushes? I’ll help you get to your room,” Jamie said sweetly.

“No, I’m good here. See, that guy over there.” Zack pointed his finger over to big dude with a football jersey on. I’m guessing that was the college football player Jackson was talking about. “I’m going to beat him up with my shoe. That how powerful I am. I don’t even need two shoes, just one,” Zack screamed so that the football guy could hear him.

“You wouldn’t do that. You’ll pass out before you’ll throw the shoe at him. Now get out of the bushes.” Jamie crossed her arms, showing she was serious.

“I already have thrown my shoe at him. So there.” I let out a chuckle at Zack’s drunken state.
Jamie rolled her eyes. She reached over, grabbing Zack’s hand. She pulled him out of the bushes despite his protests. She throw his drunken body at me. She glared at me before turning toward the front door.

“Well don’t just stand there. Carry him upstairs,” Jamie said, sternly.

I groaned, walking to the door. Zack was on his way to passing out on my shoulder. I walked passed Jamie, who held the door open for me.

“I want to go back to the bushes. I almost had that guy right were I wanted him. I don’t want to go to bed,” Zack whined as we passed Jamie, like some five year old.

“You’ll thank me later,” Jamie replied, smiling.

≈

“Jamie,” I said, trying to wake up the sleeping girl. “Jamie, wake up.” She groaned rolling over. “Jamie, rise in shine. You want food?”

Jamie opened her eyes, sleepily. She blinked a couple of times before she realized it was me.

“Go away, Scott,” she said, pushing my face away. “I don’t want to talk to you.” I knew she was still mad at me about last night.

We hadn’t talked the rest of the night. She avoided me by going to talk to some guy Alec knew. Jamie did give me many glares through the night. I still couldn’t figure out why she was mad about the kiss. I just wanted to talk to her. I tried last night before we went to bed but she closed her door in my face.

“Oh come on, Jamie don’t you want breakfast?”

“I’ll make me something later.”

“Good luck with that. Some guy went to the fridge looking for beer last night and throw up in it instead. So I thought we could go out for breakfast just you and me. The others will be nursing a hangover.”

She looked up at me. It was like she was searching for answers about the kiss through my eyes. I don’t think she was going to find them there.

“Fine.” She threw back the covers and got out. “Give me fifteen minutes.” She opened her bedroom door, signaling for me to get out.

“Got it.” I went downstairs, waiting for her.

Fifteen minutes later, Jamie came down wearing a striped sweater with holes and the bottom and skinny jeans that had holes in the knees and were frayed at the end. Even with all those ratty old clothes, she still manage to turn heads wherever she went, including the living room. I took her to the local café that was her favorite. I was trying to be nice, get on her good side before she asks questions. We sat in silence for awhile. I wasn’t quite sure what to say.

“I think we should forget about it,” Jamie stated, breaking the silence.

“Forget about what?” I asked. I was so happy she was talking to me that I forgot why I invited her to come with me.

“The kiss.” She said it with no emotion. She was ashamed of the kiss. “Why don’t we never mention it? It will only complicate things. Deal?” She stretched out her hand for me to shake.

“Does this mean we can go back to the way we were before? You won’t be mad at me?” I asked. She nodded as I shook her hand. “Good. Now eat up. I’ve got a place to show you.”

“Why?” She raised an eyebrow in question.

“Did you forget our deal last night? If I danced three songs with you, I got to show what’s there to stay for. I held up my part now you need to.”

She laughed. “Oh, right. I guess I did forget.” She smiled at me. I smiled back.

≈

“No peaking,” I said as I led Jamie down the steps. I had my hands covering her eyes. I wanted it to be a surprise.

“I’m not,” she said, laughing.

I got to the perfect place. It was the one of the most beautiful sights. I knew Jamie would love it.

“Okay, you ready?” I asked.

“Of course.”

I removed my hands, letting her see the beach in front of her. Sure it was cold but this beach was my favorite. “Ta da.”

Jamie looked at the beach, almost speechless. “Wow. This is incredible. Why did you pick this place?”

“My parents took me down here when I was a kid. I started coming down here with them when my brother died. They would take me every time I was sad. They would say that the ocean held all the tears ever cried. It was God’s way of letting us know that everything was going to be ok. I never understood it as a kid. But now I understand what they meant. The things were cried over is not as big as we think it is. Those problems are like waves. They seem like the worse things in the world but when it all comes down, it seems like they had no purpose. Well, that’s what I got out of it.”

Jamie just looked at me. “No, I get it.”

“You’re probably the only one.”

We stood beside each other, not saying a thing. Jamie put her head on my shoulder. We watched the waves crashing in. The sound was peaceful. The whole place was peaceful. I knew this wasn’t going to be the thing that made Jamie want to stay alive. I had tricks up my sleeves.

“Scott,” Jamie said, softly.

“Yeah.” I looked to her

“Thanks for this.” She smiled at me.