If I Die Young

“I’m bored,” Jamie stated while we were watching TV. She had her feet thrown over my legs. “I think you should take me to the next place.”

“Oh so you look forward to it now?” I asked amused.

“Only because I get to spend time with you.”

Jackson rolled his eyes from the other side of the living room.

“Please,” she said, giving me the puppy dog look.

“Fine, go get your coat,” I finally gave in.

“Yes,” she screamed jumping and running to her room.

“I have to say that Jamie seems to be taking a likely to you,” Jackson spoke up.

“You sound like her father,” I said, rolling my eyes.

“Shut up, Scott. She means a lot to me. I would kill you if you ever hurt her. Now I don’t know what you two have going on but if she ends up with a broken heart, you’ll be the one with a broken face, got it?”

“Got it.” I never messed with Jackson when he was all serious like he was now.

“Ready?” Jamie asked as she jumped down the last stepped.

“Yea, let’s go,” I answered taking her hand and leading her to my car.

≈

“Do you have a thing for water or something?” Jamie asked as she watched the lake out of the car window.

“Hey, don’t hate on the places,” I said, making her laugh.

“Sorry. Are we just going to sit in a field somewhere and look at the lake?”

“No, we’re going to sit on a dock.”

“But those are usually on private property.”

“Yea, we’re going to my grandfather’s lake house.”

“You’re grandfather has a lake house?” Her eyes widened. “Won’t we be disrupting him?”

“No, they never come up here.”

“Oh okay,” She said as I pulled the car into the drive way of the cabin.

“Come on,” I said, taking her hand and leading her to the dock.

I sat down and she did the same. The sun was setting. The water was so still it looked like glass. It was a sight that I would love to capture on film.

“This is my favorite time to come up here. Right when the sun is setting,” I whispered in her ear.

“It’s beautiful. The colors are just breath taking,” Jamie stated in amazement. “Why did you pick this place?” She turned to look at me.

“My whole family would come out here during the summer. When it was about this time, every night my brother and I would come out here and stare at the sun set. We would talk about anything and everything. I guess coming out here makes me feel closer to him.”

“Wow, Scott. I would never thought a guy would have so many places that mean so much to him.”

“You don’t give guys enough credit.”

“I guess I don’t.”

“Do you feel any different about dying young?”

“I guess I’m afraid of missing moments like this.”

“Moments with me?”

“Yea,” Jamie said in a small voice.

Her eyes met mine. I could read every emotion in them. She was feeling lost but she was also happy. I leaned closer, feeling a replay of the party. I felt her breath on my lips. I cupped her cheek before pressing my lips gently against hers. This kiss was different from the other one. But it was a good different. She wrapped her arms around my neck pulling me closer to her. I tangled my hands into her red hair. We pulled away, still looking in each other’s eyes. Jamie shook her head, getting up from where she was sitting. I started after her.

“Jamie where are you going?” I asked, grabbing her forearm.

“You shouldn’t have done that. We promised that we would never do that again,” she said, looking down at my hand.

“I’m sorry. I know it was wrong. But I don’t regret it.”

“You should.”

“But I don’t. You shouldn’t either, Jamie.”

She shook her head once again. I tried to reach out for her but she pushed me away, making me fall off the dock into the lake. I heard her footsteps walk away as I came up from the water.

≈

Jamie shut the door behind her, leaving me outside. I pushed the door after her, watching her storm away.

“Jamie, I said I was sorry,” I screamed after her. “What else do you want me to do?”

“Don’t talk to me,” She said before walking up the stairs.

I slid against the door. I messed up. I know I promised not to kiss her but the moment was so perfect.

“What happened?” Jackson said. “And why the hell are you wet?”

I looked up to find him standing over me.

“It’s a long story.”

He threw me the towel in his hand and motion for me to follow him. “Come on let’s talk.”

I dried my curls with towel as Jackson made coffee. I’m guessing we were going to be up for a while.

“So sit and tell me what happened.”

“I kissed her, Jackson. I kissed Jamie and she pushed me into the lake,” I said, waiting for him to smack me.

“You kissed Moose?” He asked. I nodded. “And she pushed you in the lake?” I nodded again. He laughed. “That sounds like something you would do.”

“I’m glad that you’re finding this funny.”

“Sorry, Scott. Why wouldn’t Jamie want you to kiss her?’

“That night at the party when you came looking for her, I kissed her. She told me the next day that we shouldn’t do it again or speak of it.”

“And you said that you wouldn’t do that?”

“Yea.” I looked down at the cup of coffee Jackson had given me.

“Listen, Jamie is scared of someone caring for her. She thinks it makes her weak. And no matter how much she says she trusts you, she doesn’t completely. She’s broken and scared. It’s not that she doesn’t want you to kiss her and care for her. She just wants to take care of herself and be strong. She’ll come to her sense soon enough.”

“So what should I do?”

“Beg for her forgiveness until your knees are bleeding. When she gives it to you, just be her friend.”

“Thanks, Jackson.”

“Anytime bud.”